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  #1  
Old 21-05-2012, 05:39 PM
peteyzen peteyzen is offline
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Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: leicester
Posts: 1,562
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flapping

one of my short stories, hope you like it:

FLAPPING

`God is constantly bombarding you with answers`. He said.
Ron scratched his nose, his irritation growing.
`Look around you, God isn’t miles away he’s here`.
Ron watched the smile cross the man’s face as he had spoken and hated it, once he had trusted that smile.
Several of the others sitting in the darshan hall did actually look around, trying to see the self same presence of God that Krishna had just referred to.
`Fools` he thought.
Krishna then bowed his head, `Please meditate with me on the colour red`.
There was some shuffling and re arranging as they all moved their bodies into the lotus position and fixed their mudra’s into place and set their minds, all that is bar Ron.
The anger was running too free in his mind.
Four years, four long hard wasted years. Nothing, no experiences, no peace, no visions, he knew that there was no God now. It was all just a great big sham. Krishna didn’t take money, so it wasn’t some sort of scam. His motivation had to be some sort of `master complex`, that was it, he presumably got off on being the source of spiritual knowledge, his peoples fount of the esoteric. Sad really thought Ron, so many duped, him self included. It was obvious, how could a young man in his early twenties really be a spiritual master. How could he have been so easily duped by simple words.
Well, at least he was stopping now. Ron settled into his half lotus and waited for his moment, avoiding the pointless meditation, keeping the momentum of his anger up.

The class meditated on for twenty minutes and Krishna rang a small jingly bell to end the session. Ron realised he had always hated that bloody bell, he realised that it signified failure to him, failure to achieve anything. Every time it rang he would be close to tears, another bit of his life passed and no gain, nothing achieved.
He used to think that he was just rubbish at meditation, like a bad footballer or artist. But then he realised that wasn’t the case. It had to be that the whole spiritual thing was just a lie. The trap of course is that if there is no spiritual element to life, then what is there? The fact that there might be nothing seemed to keep most of theses folks trapped, searching for the rest of their lives, because the hope that there is something divine or esoteric is better than the reality of nothing, no God, no spirit. Ron had made his peace with that.
He wanted to stop wasting the time he had left and do something with his life, especially as he was now pretty sure that there was nothing after it.

`Thank you for coming`.
There was that big smile again, as he bowed his head and put his hands together. The group unfolded out of their assana’s and stretched , picked themselves up from the floor and made their way out, chatting in whispers conspiratorially. Probably making up stories about how wonderful their meditations were thought Ron, poor misguided fools.

`Ron, might I have a moment`. Krishna asked him, almost too quietly to be heard.
How does he do that? Wondered Ron. How did he know that I am upset?
He was good you had to give him that, he must read faces well.

As the room emptied Ron stood and walked over to Krishna, who turned from putting out his candles and switched on his smile.
`We need to speak I think`?
`I’m leaving`. Spouted Ron, he had wanted to say so much more before he got to the point of issuing his coup de gras and was disappointed with himself.
`I know` said Krishna simply.
That got Ron’s dander up. He did this all the time pretending he knew the future.
`It’s a shame because you’re very close`.
Ron’s anger flooded out in a torrent of words.
`You don’t know….. you know nothing , it’s all ****. I’m not close, whatever that means, you have been saying I’m close for years and that’s just more rubbish. Truth is there is nothing to be close to. I have been trying for years and I would have got somewhere by now if there was anywhere to get to`.
`Come with me to the window` Krishna said.
Surprised at Krishna’s calmness in the face of the storm of his words, Ron simply followed, feeling a little ashamed at his out burst.
Before they reached the window Krishna turned and smiled, he looked like somebody who had been wrestling with a problem and the solution had presented itself. He put his hands together in the prayer position and bowed his head slightly, as he did when he thanked his students for bringing him a glass of water. He walked on.

`It’s about flapping` Krishna said.
Ron wrinkled his eyebrows questioningly.
`You understand the theory that you have had many lives before`. Ron was about to tell Krishna that he now understood that that **** wasn’t true, when submissively Krishna said; `Just bear with me, hear me out if you will, as this is a crossroads for you`.
Ron nodded his head, it certainly was. He would listen, ignore it and go, so he smiled back.
`In each life we have a lot to learn, lessons to grasp, many lessons but usually one or two massive ones. Once learned we move on, if left unlearned we return, we come back in a different body time and time again until we get it.
So if you leave now, it really doesn’t matter, I like you as a friend and will miss you as such. However, as your teacher I think it’s time I explained the main thing you’re here to appreciate, the thing your about to miss….again.
Many people think that spirituality is laid back, that by just turning up the universe will change them. Just `be` they say and they sit in meditation letting their mind drift and dream. This is helpful for some but it won’t get people anywhere significant`.

Ron was shocked at the directness of Krishna.
`Look` Krishna said and pointed out of the window.
`God is constantly bombarding us with answers all of the time`.
Ron, not yet looking out of the window, said. `Didn’t you say that earlier`.
`Yes, you heard the words but were too upset to realise that in them lies your salvation, look`. Again he pointed out of the second storey window.
The garden below had chunks of bread scattered across the grass and several thrushes wandered amongst them nervously feeding on the pieces.

`Watch the thrush on the left`. Said Krishna, immediately it flapped its’ wings and shot off into the air.
`Therein lies your problem`. Said Krishna
`Your right`. Said Ron getting annoyed again, and adding sarcastically,
`I can’t fly`.
`No you can’t` said Krishna seriously, `And it’s all down to flapping`.
Ron shook his head as the ridiculousness of the conversation irritated him.
`If a bird just stood on the ground and flapped it’s wings gently,…. you know just lightly up and down, how long would it be before it took off`?
`I don’t know` said Ron still irritated.
`Give me a rough guess`. Krishna laughed.
`Well, obviously if it flapped its’ wings too gently it would never take off` Said Ron.
`Exactly`! Shouted Krishna clapping his hands together, then he pointed excitedly into the clear blue sky, `See the birds up there, soaring effortlessly, when they are up there it is easy, but getting up there in the first place, beginning is not so easy`. Krishna turned and still smiling, looked into Ron’s eyes, worlds turned in those eyes.
`People want to fly without flapping hard enough, they want the sky but first they need to get off the ground. Watch the thrushes now, the ones eating the bread, watch how hard they have to work to get up off the ground as they start to fly, and the bigger the bird the harder the effort required`.

Ron, smirked, still irascible, `I suppose that as I’m a lot bigger than the birds then that’s why I’m not getting anywhere`. It was sarcasm and he regretted it immediately, he loved Krishna, but his hurt and disappointment flooded out, his restraint gone.
`No, the size of the bird in our analogy with Humans, is equivalent to the size of our ego’s, the smaller the ego the less the effort required but even with small ego’s , like our thrushes, enormous effort is required to first raise us up from the material world`.
Ron couldn’t meet the truth in Krishna’s eyes, he turned his head to look out of the window again.
Just then, down on the grass a young brown and mottle grey thrush struggled to take off, it had eaten a lot of bread and was new to flying. It took three serious attempts of flapping like a machine gun before it took to the skies, once up, just a few extra flaps and it was soaring.
Something clicked in Ron, the anger decreased, he knew, his attempts over the past few years had been half hearted. As he thought and appreciated this, Krishna said. `Give me everything you have, all of your inner content, focus, trust, love and desire and using them, meditate with total concentration for the next five days Ron, flap like you have never flapped before.`
Ron considered this for a moment; he was perched on the edge, wobbling, unsure. Then his anger returned, he had tried for four years, how much longer would he waste, he made his decision.
`No`.
He bowed with respect, a bow Krishna returned.
`I am sure you are making the right decision for you`, said Krishna`.
`You have my blessings, God bless you`.
Ron turned and walked away. In the doorway an attendant bowed to Ron as they passed, Ron nodded and went off.
The attendant entered the room and bowed to Krishna, `My Lord, is Ron leaving us`.
Krishna turned and his large eyes smiled at the attendant.
`Yes he goes on to other experiences`.
`Why is he leaving`? He enquired.
Krishna answered, `He is too big a bird`.

Sixty years later
The new acolytes entered Krishna’s darshan room, they waited nervously until everyone in the room stood, and they got their first glimpse of the great spiritual master as he was wheeled in by one of his attendants.
Smiling Krishna signalled for everyone to sit.
One by one the new acolytes stood and moved forward, Serena was just sixteen and scared, this had been a big decision, one her parents had not agreed with, but she was strongly drawn to spirituality and something in the smile of Krishna in his picture had captured her heart.
As the acolyte in front of her moved away, at last she stood before the great man.
`Aah you have returned to me, as a little bird` He said.
`I beg your pardon`? Said Serena.
`You are here to learn to flap my dear`
Krishna chuckled. `So good to see you again my friend` He said.
Serena began to wonder if she had made a mistake.
He took her hand and smiled that smile, and said. `You will understand soon enough, I Promise, just watch the birds`.
Serena stepped away from Krishna and moved over to the window, where a sudden movement out of the side of her vision caught her attention, she turned and watched as a thrush lifted off from the ground flapping it’s wings like a mad thing.
And she understood.
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  #2  
Old 21-05-2012, 09:20 PM
amy green
Posts: n/a
 
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Oh I really like the depth of this story Pete, i.e. especially the last paragraph....if not in this life.... Wonderful!
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  #3  
Old 22-05-2012, 11:21 AM
mArIya mArIya is offline
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Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: Perth Australia
Posts: 791
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Beautiful story Pete.......really enjoyed reading it....well done
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