Ok so how do you let go ?

Kiwigirl11 · #1 01-03-2013, 12:39 AM

I know everyone on here ,myself included has talked about ,letting go ,but how do you actually do it? .....I go to meditation classes i have done little rituals ,things like writing that i surrender and am letting go on pieces of paper and burning them in the fire ....i have tried visualising letting him go .....but so far nothing has worked .....or they only work for a little bit ....so how do you actually do it ,does anyone know ?

Teal · #2 01-03-2013, 12:49 AM

First bake a cake second ice it with a lot of icing. Then get a big glasses of milk and cut a big slice of the cake you made and eat it.lol

I think you are almost to the point where I am. I have lost interest in how to "talk" or "get" the tf. I am now at the point where I am on to me now. Making myself happy. Having happy kids.....Finding other interests.

I see the tf is a portion of my life. But I think I am the bigger portion OF MY LIFE...

Teal · #3 01-03-2013, 12:51 AM

I want my world to revolve around me. I owe it to myself to find other interests and things.

Liladeryn · #4 01-03-2013, 12:56 AM

I agree with Teal get interested in you and your life,not him ..Its also helped me to stop seeing it as this magical connection and see it without the rose colored glasses on..Reality helped me move on and a good dose of I was just sick of it all

Kiwigirl11 · #5 01-03-2013, 12:56 AM

Yes Teal ,i think i'm slowly getting there .....i have tried to undrstand this whole TF mess i'm in ,but i get nowhere ,all i get is more and more confusion ,asking questions and getting no answers ......I want so badly to know what this is all about ,yet i get nothing .....I sick of the ups and downs and my TF who seems to go out of his way to hurt me time and time again and i sit and wait for him everytime to do it to me all over again.how stupid is that ..def time to go within now think about myself and once and forall let go ,if i can figure out how .....Yep and perhaps make that cake also,once i'm not feeling so sick ...sounds great:)

#6 01-03-2013, 12:57 AM

How it is starting to work for me in general is by changing my perception which alter my perception of reality. A mantra of mine is: if you do not like it, then rewrite it. It is not necessarily about letting go but more about not getting affected in an unbalanced way.

#7 01-03-2013, 01:03 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kiwigirl11

I want so badly to know what this is all about ,yet i get nothing

Maybe that is the answer, it is about nothing

and you can give it the meaning you want it to have. That you are the master of your own life, not just a piece of life but a masterpiece

#8 01-03-2013, 01:05 AM

HOW??? Take a deep breath, fill your body with lots of love all for you, then go to a mirror, tell yourself how awesome you are and the next guy is gonna be even BETTER

but for now your going to focus on you, forget him, tell yourself , who cares, so what and leap into your future.

Kaere · #9 01-03-2013, 01:05 AM

I know some won't like my advice. Take it or leave it, it's not meant to hurt.

In order to let go, there must be some sort of acceptance of situation. If you haven't accepted the situation the way it is, there's nothing that your mind and heart has to let go of, do you see what I mean? In order to let go of an apple, you have to have an apple to let go of...

So what I might suggest if you're looking to 'let go' of this man who you love is... to accept that you love him. Don't even worry about the details, etc. Sit in silence and just accept that you love him. When a thought comes up like "but he did this" or "what a jerk"... let them fly away and return to the idea that you love him. You may need to do this many times with many different problems, letting them fly away and returning to centre.

You may find that this eases the ache in the heart, softens it. You may find that you like the feeling of being full up with love for no reason... it's pretty cool. You may even find that you can feel that love without having it connected to him at all (eventually let the idea of him fly away like the other things).

It's okay to love. It's okay to love without condition. It's okay to kick a jerk to the curb too. Be gentle and kind to yourself... take deep breaths.

I hope this helps.

SomewhereInTime · #10 01-03-2013, 01:42 AM

I've been feeling kind of overwhelmed myself and wanting to let it all go. I'm a work in progress on that. For me, I'm accepting things the way they are and then letting it go while reminding myself that if it is meant to be it will be. When thoughts of him are constant, I consciously try to think of something else, something happy & positive. Change your thinking, change your world.

This doesn't change the unconditional love I have for him and I don't think of him in a negative way at all. I can't. I have no reason to. I acknowledge that I'm always going to love him until the day I die, whether he knows it or not, whether he is married or not, whether he would feel the same way back or not. It just is.

You can do this...it just takes a conscious effort.