Free Love

[Matthias]

The experience of spontaneous intimacy is a rare occasion in our times, and it almost always comes down to these do-or-die situations, where we are called to act like humans, but often hesitate to, because things move so quickly in our world and we feel, that we are either not allowed, or unable to deliver under the given circumstances.

It might be part of the game in the challenge that love is, that we have to find the courage and wits to jump at the chance, but i find it too easy to only blame ourselves for all the lost opportunities and could-have-been relations in our lives.

I recently read a story about a man who tried to flirt with women in sub trains. He did it in a polite way. He wouldn't become rude or intrusive. A couple of days later he was stopped by the police and brought to a mental hospital where they examined his condition to decide whether his behavior was dangerous and he should be kept and treated. Eventually they let him go, because he didn't behave wrong in a legal sense.

First of all, that guy isn't me , but I must say that I feel for him, because I ask myself, why it is seen as so bizarre what he did. Is it because we think, that someone who does such thing must be kind of desperate, must be a loner, a no-lifer, a weirdo an antisocial man, etc...?

So what we do is, we blame the guy for not playing along, the way he is supposed to. He is seemingly not capable or willing to undergo the kind of procedures, like getting a job, buying a nice home and a car, dating a woman in style, take her out to a nice restaurant, etc., the kind of things you are supposed to do in order to start a sound relationship with a woman nowadays.

The more you think of it you realize that this guy is a rebel of love. Let's make of him the worst we can imagine: he is broke, he's got no job, no friends, no nothing, but he still wants to make love and doesn't get it, why that shouldn't be possible in this world. He doesn't want to accept his fate of vegetating on the edge of society as a loner for the rest of his life. But instead of trying to live up to all these complicated, materialistic rituals that are embedded into our social behavior, he breaks the rules of engagement.

Another scene, that I have witnessed some time ago, that puzzled me, was about a homeless guy sitting in a public place. He seemed kinda rough but witty, with shabby clothes. He probably didn't smell to good, missed some teeth, had messy hair and held a can of beer in one hand. Pretty much the typical picture-book homeless guy. But what amazed me was: there was an attractive, well-dressed, mature woman sitting next to him, listening to him, holding hands with him. And when i saw that i thought it was beautiful.

I find, that this woman too is a rebel of love. She wasn't afraid to show everyone that she had sympathy for this man, that she cared for him and wasn't rejecting him for his outer appearance. She probably left him then and they never met again, she probably was a social worker, but who knows. The point is: such signs of devotion and kindness have become so rare in our world, that they almost seem like an out-of-this-world experience when we stumble into them.

There is this song from the 70s, that goes something like "Nobody gets too much love anymore, it's much harder to come by and harder to find" and that fits. We are in dire need of love and we are lost in a society that doesn't help us to turn it on. We only produce it on the screen, while in real life, we are trapped in a possessive behavior that limits our social human to the highest degree.

Though these songs about love are true and nice to listen to, we can find hypocrisy in the displays of our popular culture. There are the beautiful people in movies and music, who party and dance all over the place, do all the things that seem quite crazy and get it on with each other. But that's only good on the screen. Try that in real life and people call the police and say you are mental.

When we look at how the homeless are treated today, how they are looked at in general, as if there was something essentially wrong with them. we know, that we are far off from a culture of love. Fine, even if they don't care to apply for a job in the current system, does that degrade their value as a person so that our society has the right to deny them a dignified life? In a system I'd like to imagine, they didn't even need to work.

I think in coming times, we have to accept, that there are people out there who just want to live and enjoy their life in simple terms. They are not into making a career, into getting involved with stressful occupations. It is a shame to bash these people, when we know that the true damage to our society and environment is done by these other people of seemingly high integrity.

You might know that the famous Greek philosopher Socrates had kind of a difficult relationship with his wife Xanthippe. She wanted him to be a responsible head of the family, do a job, go out and earn money. But he preferred to spend his time in the streets or in public places talking to young people, philosophizing with them. That was what he loved the most, that was his calling. It didn't earn him any money, but thereby he made a name of himself, that has lasted through the ages. And the only reason that his wife's name is on the screen, is because of his legacy and the stories of how she mistreated him.

We could say, that this society treats homeless people, like Xanthippe treated Socrates. Their life style is being bashed and seen as futile, but they too represent love in their way. Even if they don't possess the spirit of a great philosopher they are valuable and they should be accepted as they are.

Love is buried inside of us and often not allowed to shine, because possessive thinking corrupts the desires of love in our culture and limits us in the way it defines the morals of our relations.

The Hippies understood, that in order to love free, you have to free yourself from possessive thinking and possessive relations. That's why they founded communities, where they lived together, shared and loved each other with no restraint. A couple would be together as long as they wished, and if the relation cooled down, they were free to be with someone else. There was no outer or inner compulsion to stick together, no phoney morals, no envy, no jealousy, no bad blood. Not even their kids caused a problem since they were raised in the comfort of a big loving human family. It wasn't of such big relevance of who's flesh they were, they loved and raised them together.

I find that this is the way to go for us again, though with a little more precaution this time, less anti-technological and less excessive in terms of sexual behavior and drug use.

Since the core of the moneyless-society movement has already grown out of the harsh scientific utopia of the original Zeitgeist and come to the point of a gift economy, that is is basically about a modern culture of love in harmony with our planet, we might as well call it now the Hippies 2.0.

I've never been into drugs, but I've always liked sleeping and i felt, that the dream world speaks to us from the depth of our soul. When at night, we leave behind the worries of our daily lives and step into the realm of dreams, there is this intuitive connection with the scenery. It's like we are soul mates with all the wonderous characters and beings that we encounter and all the feelings are very intense. The way we behave and express ourselves is quite natural and fluent. I find that a fascinating thing. In our dreams the emotional restraints that bother us in the awake-state fall off and we are free to show our true desires. We might not be in full control of ourselves and aware of the ongoing, but in that setup we become very real and get down to the basics of our existence.

That should make us wonder, why we shouldn't manage to establish such fundamental communion and sympathy in our real lives and make the business of getting in touch with each other, one of less complicated and suspicious sort.

We need a society that makes love our calling, makes love our main occupation, puts it before all other things. Love shall shine on us like the sun, it shall glow in us from the bottom of our hearts and illuminate us with joy. We would always rely on it and feel it in every given situation regardless of our preferred job or life style.

A world of free love, is a world free from the corruption of love, is a world free from the reign of materialism and its restraints, where we become accessible and respond to each others essential desires and share a deep understanding for the gift of life and its basic priorities.

[Smiler]

Hi ~ An interesting read that was :) .. I am wondering what exactly did the man do in his way of polite flirting? ~ What did he say or gesture for example? I guess there is a fine line also between Media and facts.

~ In recent past weeks I was actually chased by a man whilst I was out exercising ~ It was very VERY obvious what he wanted to do if he caught me. ~ I reported him .. yet he apparently had not committed an offense as I was not touched... He is still out there . Makes you wonder about who is being protected really?

Love and Light
:)

[muileag]

I only have 15 minutes or so to read in the morning while enjoying my tea before heading to work, and I'm so glad that I chose to click on your thread...full of positive energy

It would be nice, wouldn't it, to live as you described (at least it would fit my temperament), but I just don't see it going mainstream. We can all play small parts though, like the lady interacting with the homeless man that others passed by and shunned because he "doesn't fit in." We never get to know another person until we take the time to sit down and listen to them...and share ourselves with them. This takes time...something our society is in short supply of.

And now I am off to wake my boys so we can all get ready for school/work.
Have a fantastic day, Matthias!

Another interesting post, Matthias.

About the polite flirting among other things, the latitude allowed people with their behaviour, just as the diagnosis of mental ailments, is a cultural issue and culture changes over time, sometimes a short time. My parents talk about the freedom of the 1960s, spoken of as the permissive society when, if parents wanted to be in the scene, they were classed as "progressive". It was one-an-a-half revolutions by the sound of it.

Behaviour considered perfectly natural back then could well be considered a mental aberration these days. In many respects, the pendulum of openness and enlightenment of those times has swung the other way and taken us into a darker age where taboo and censorship are the norm. My mother is one of the traditional, Greer-styled feminists - or was, and now rues the way feminism has gone, doing more to distance the genders rather than promote dialogue, thus some signifiers of "flirting" half a century ago are now considered sexual misdemeanours.

The Hippies understood, that in order to love free, you have to free yourself from possessive thinking and possessive relations. That's why they founded communities, where they lived together, shared and loved each other with no restraint. A couple would be together as long as they wished, and if the relation cooled down, they were free to be with someone else. There was no outer or inner compulsion to stick together, no phoney morals, no envy, no jealousy, no bad blood. Not even their kids caused a problem since they were raised in the comfort of a big loving human family. It wasn't of such big relevance of who's flesh they were, they loved and raised them together.

A paradisical idea that the establishment soon hated...because, I'm told, people were too ready to drop out of established institutions like "work" and mortgages and whimsical authority (as embodied in the drug laws) so it did all it could to end this bliss, certainly in the uk.

♫

[linen53]

I seldom read long essays, but I felt compelled to read yours.

I was of that hippie generation you spoke of and yes, we were much less concerned about possession and ownership than previous societies. You have to understand, the beatnik and hippie revolution evolved from a very repressive society. We gave birth to a new way of living and thinking.

We started to question everything and we thought outside the box. We were happy after living in a repressed and oftentimes abusive childhood. We threw open the doors for everyone to see what was inside.

I look at teens and young adults today and I feel proud to have been a part of the hippy era when we were all about awareness and feeling our emotions.

We lost our connection with one another when we entered our technological era, which we are in now. Can you see a hippie at a sit-in smoking a joint and talking on a cell phone? That would be an emphatic no. The hippies were living each moment in the now. You had their full attention even if they were high.

So the kids of today have their DS or whatever handheld gaming system or smart phone with a kagllion games downloaded to keep them entertained and quiet while the adults talk or in an airport or restaurant.

How can today's society love one another when they don't even talk to one another?

We interact on a intimate level when two bodies are occupying one space we converse and our auras intermingle, and that, my friend just doesn't take place much anymore.

So if you want a society with love and consideration and interacting, throw the televisions, phones, electronic gaming systems out into the landfill and we will get back to what matters. But we both know that won't happen.

[Matthias]

Thx for you kind words of endorsement, muileag!

Hello Lorelyen!

You are right, sexes are in disharmony and more fighting than loving each other nowadays and I didn't want to give the impression that I only blame the female part for it. It's hard to say what is cause and effect in that area and who's mentality is to blame originally. I think the blame lies on both and in the end both are losers, because they need each other. Tho there is a tendency today to see homosexual behavior as normal, I feel that it is a sexual disorder, that has its deeper cause in this. One sex trying to simulate sexual intimacy with itself because it is frustrated and saddened with its relation to the other. They might make themselves believe that it is right, but I don't think so.

Hello linen53!

I'm happy to speak with someone who experienced the era, because I just about missed it.

I think we don't have to throw all of our modern technology away, but only those items of a commercialized culture that corrupt our ambition for a loving community and that for sure contains a whole range of mindless products of the entertainment industry that is just there to dull peoples minds with superficial stuff and illusion, making them unaware of their deeper desires.

I enjoy how technology enables us to communicate our thoughts to people all over the world as if they were sitting next to us. That is a fantastic possibility. Of course you have to find the right places, where people are about the serious stuff.

You can use that tool to grow a global consciousness, that could bring about a revolution of hearts that will ultimately show its effects in the way we manage ourselves in the real world. And I think it's already happening. We just have to be willing to look for the signs and endorse them.

Of course you can argue, that, if the hippies had succeeded, we'd probably didn't have to connect via internet to find our connection and soul mates. But I see potential in it, even in further supporting a modern culture of love, connecting real communities and giving us the feel of a global family.

[someguy92]

Yes your intentions are good and idea is right, but sorry to say this, your are wrong and it doesnt work this way. Let me clarify, your point of views are kind of naive.

Let start with that flirting thing, people are insecure and world is harsh place. Everything is upside down, while they give rapists and murderers a chance, but they call police on normal nice people. That is mistake of misjudgement and their faulty thinking. Of course this doesnt happen always, but its more ussual than ever. There is of course difference between flirting and "flirting". One can be just fun and if you two are interested in each other, increase sexual tension, the other is just fuffiling basic need of sex, while not doing the act, but siphoning the sexual energy. Of course again, when people are not in the mood or interested, than they shouldnt flirt.

You would be surprised how many relationships are just finding alternative mother/father. The stunning majority, believe it or not, are just finding alternative mother in ther partner...just look around you and you will see ugly and beautifull together. And outer beauty with inner beauty are interlinked, as above so below, it follows this same principle and thats why physiognomy works, from my own experience your face and eyes are mirror of your soul, of course there is beauty is in the eye of beholder, but I am mainly talking about symetry, symetry is good looking to all, symetry in face means the person is balanced and body is your responsibility, its a mirror of your lifestyle, of how you take care of yourself and how you see yourself. Dont start with the hollywood poppycock of ugly and the beast wich promotes parents in partner relationship. You see, real relationships should be when two independent people on the same level who want to make their life easier and care about eachother. But how many are those types of relationships? Almost none, they are almost non existent. You only see parents in partner, golddiggers or karmic relationships...

Feeling pitty for homeless people....you see 95% of homeless people CHOOSE to be the way they live. There ARE places for them to have another chance at life, but they dont join them, you know why? Because they love being without responsibilities and alcohol more than anything else. They are outcasts who dont want to change their life. Why should I feel pitty for someone who is happy? They have alcohol and no responsibilities, its their life, their choosing and they have to pay the full price. Giving them love, gets them nothing. You see many people dont get second chance and you want to give another to someone who threw so many chances out of window? That is injustice and that is against natural laws. You must understand we are all responsible for ourselves, its about our growth and our life is about growth. They have to pay for their foolish decisions, mistakes, we all do mistakes, but what they do are decisions and decision is something you and only you do. There are tons of ways to get out of street.

Hippies were just bunch of again responsibless people who misused drugs and mistaken sex with love. Those are TWO different things. And they were experiment of the goverment, they wanted to test LSD and other drugs for army and when experiments were done, they just let the hippie movement die. Dont be foolish.

Giving love to everyone? Free love? Sorry, but you must deserve love at first. Life is not fair, but only we can change this, by bringing justice. Evil thrives when good does nothing. We live in Godless society, that is the problem. The only real TRUE GENUINE love, is within us. There is no person that can give you real love. Love is connection with God, its being Godlike, its when you are human being to the core.Other people look for love in other people, drugs etc. but its there, when you live as you should, when you are with God and independent. But you see, we live in Godless times, because it is needed for our growth. Without darkness you cannot see the light. Without bad you cannot know what is good. Your idea of pure love world is...just daydreaming and well not real. You must understand how this world works and than, you will understand one important thing. Everything is going as it should be. Yes it may be cruel, it may be hard to read...but what is good? Is it better to go trough hard times and punishment, when in the end it will either break you or make you a better man, or live in luxurious life, where you stagnate and will never grow?Life is neverending stream, you either float or drown. I never had it easy in my life, but of course there are many people who had it worse...but you know what? I am gratefull for all the bad things in my life, they made me powerfull and stronger than anything else. You see everything is about how you look at it, what is obstacle to one person may be chance for growth for another. Now I look at things differently too, when bad things happen I see it as chance to grow and win in the end. Our ultimate goal is to reuinte with God and grow in the hierarchy, the pyramid of life. Your idea would be against this very principle, against the principle of life. Remember, Everything is as it should be, life is not fair, but its about dancing in the rain. Ofcourse you should be empathetic, but to those who deserve it. But again you must be cruel to those who deserve it. Like budhism teaches, golden middle road.

[Ascension]

Amazing read ...

[Matthias]

Hello someguy92!

You have made your point clear: the world is evil and we have to accept it. Everything has to be as it is. All ambitions to change something is naive and doomed to fail. We can only hope for a better afterlife. You had a hard time in this godforsaken world, therefor you want all others to suffer the same hardships in order to find more meaning in your own.

It doesn't sound like you are a powerful person, but rather a frustrated and paranoid one. Can't you see how you are pushing your frustration onto others? You're telling me that life isn't fair. That is nonsense! Life is perfectly fair in the way we get exactly what we deserve as we fool ourselves in this destructive mentality. If we choose to abandon love, our society becomes loveless and every part of us feels the pressure.

In terms of the homeless. There is a reason that people fail in this system. Not because they are stupid or irresponsible, but because they are doomed to fail by demanding to be treated like human beings rather than products and services. They are vegetating, because this society is incapable of seeing the true value of life.

[someguy92]

Originally Posted by Matthias

Hello someguy92!

You have made your point clear: the world is evil and we have to accept it. Everything has to be as it is. All ambitions to change something is naive and doomed to fail. We can only hope for a better afterlife. You had a hard time in this godforsaken world, therefor you want all others to suffer the same hardships in order to find more meaning in your own.

It doesn't sound like you are a powerful person, but rather a frustrated and paranoid one. Can't you see how you are pushing your frustration onto others? You're telling me that life isn't fair. That is nonsense! Life is perfectly fair in the way we get exactly what we deserve as we fool ourselves in this destructive mentality. If we choose to abandon love, our society becomes loveless and every part of us feels the pressure.

In terms of the homeless. There is a reason that people fail in this system. Not because they are stupid or irresponsible, but because they are doomed to fail by demanding to be treated like human beings rather than products and services. They are vegetating, because this society is incapable of seeing the true value of life.

Clearly you didnt even grasped basic things what I wrote. What you assumed is all wrong. Clearly you are not ready to face the truth. I dont know from where you got those assumptions, but if you are projecting your problems and viewpoints onto me, than no, it doesnt work this way. Maybe you just misunderstood what I wrote and fueled by emotions you understood things wrongly, because I didnt wrote what you wanted to read, or you are protecting yourself emotionally by attacking me. Eitherway, one day, please read it carefully if you want to and you will understand what I wrote. And about those homeless people...dont be naive, please stop watching TV and go outside, live in reality, reality is different than what you are feeded everyday.

Amazing read ...

Dont know if you are sarcastic or actually genuine.