Finding Privacy in a Separation

[Lynn]

Hello

Lately I have been struggling with the issues of privacy in the separation I am working towards. Its interesting how you start to re claim your body and your personal space in places like the bathroom. Though the mate I have is not getting that aspect. "feels its all HIS" so he can go and come as he pleases.

It feels like an invasion by an army as I am hugely empathic, he does it knowing it bothers me a great deal. Its not easy this selling the house separation thing. I have a whole new compassion for those facing the same or that have faced it. Trying to find that balance is not easy.

So whom else is maybe in this place or has faced this and survived it in tack. Right now I feel showered but not showed when I take one if that makes sense.

I know its all part of the process and that there are spiritual growth lessons here to learn from and grow from.
Lynn

My view for what it's worth is that you really can't start to reclaim your individuality and privacy until separated.

It sounds as if your attempts to change the parameters of a relationship are meeting with resistance which, in a way, is to be expected unless the other person is equally concerned to do the same. Two people lodging together. It would work/be like if it had started like that but if the relationship had prior depths/involvements it isn't going to be easy.

All good wishes though. No doubt spiritual lessons will come with amelioration.
...

[Clover]

Originally Posted by Lorelyen

My view for what it's worth is that you really can't start to reclaim your individuality and privacy until separated.
...

I agree with this statement. I completely removed myself from the home when I went through a separation. It really is unhealthy for sometime to swallow the tension and negative energy, and for safety reasons too. You never know when someone is going to "snap". Silence does speak volumes, it's a calm before the storm. Please be careful!

Hoping your home sells quickly!

[sea-dove]

Originally Posted by Lorelyen

My view for what it's worth is that you really can't start to reclaim your individuality and privacy until separated.

...

I agree with the above too. To form a new kind of relationship with another, you need the space to be able to do it otherwise the ways the other is trying to interact, are quite unlikely to change.

[Silver]

Originally Posted by BlueClover

I agree with this statement. I completely removed myself from the home when I went through a separation. It really is unhealthy for sometime to swallow the tension and negative energy, and for safety reasons too. You never know when someone is going to "snap". Silence does speak volumes, it's a calm before the storm. Please be careful!

Hoping your home sells quickly!

Yes, this makes sense....but if your situation doesn't allow for you to live separately for now...just remain mindful that it's transitory and maybe your learning to be relaxed in this situation will make him realize that he's not having the impact that he'd hoped for and ease up on that behavior.