Suicide

[Sarian]

I'm sorry for the pain you are dealing with regarding the loss of your beloved aunt. I don't believe that anyone goes to hell. I have struggled with suicidel thoughts and desires and attempts my whole life. At one point, while trying to be a 'christian', I could no longer take it, and cried out to God that I didn't believe a god of love...that people claim is 'love' would cast me to a place like hell in my despair and pain. I asked for forgiveness and I cried out how I simply could not continue living in the mental and emotional anguish I was...at that moment, it was a truly liberating moment for me. All pain ceased, I got the urgent sense that I feared a place that didn't exist, all that existed was love. All my surroundings even looked different, calmer, peaceful, beautiful. It's funny because I've been listening to one of Eckhart Tolle's books on CD while driving to school each day...I read the book before and it was not doing much for me during the dark period of my life...but hearing it now and how he came to be out of his darkness, I could totally relate to.

Anyway, sorry for the rambling, please be at peace and while you miss your aunt, please don't worry she's in hell. She is not a loser, she was a hurting woman....