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Go Back   Spiritual Forums > Spirituality & Beliefs > Auras & Chakras

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  #11  
Old 13-02-2018, 01:54 PM
SpiritofZoe SpiritofZoe is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2016
Posts: 84
 
The mood and assumptions of reactions such as this- and the OP's, the whole idea of easily labeling your own good friends and lovers as "energy vampires" without realizing that, if that does happen to hurt their feelings, then, well, maybe that is your problem. What do you get out of it? A feeling of control and influence over others where you are only secure if it seems they are jealous of you or demanding of you? A feeling of security and self-justification and validation when you can call others clingy and feel like you are sought-after?
OP, Why does the current BF have so little awareness that this contact is bothering you? Aren't you & Happyhorse when they're in the same situation - putting out the signals to elicit and approve of this to some degree?
No one tries to snitch another's energy like a burglar breaking into a house. They are just doing what they learned; they came from a particular environment where people affected each other, demanded from each other, controlled, and taught kids (mostly unconsciously, by example) how to try to get their own needs met. Then kids reach adolescence and young adulthood and attract certain vibes of people to them to replay certain patterns that the higher self wants to have to reveal its own insecurities and room for growth.

Quote:
Originally Posted by happyhorse
I have started to "show" or being aware of when I notice people doing this. Some are just wanting to connect physically for bonding, but some do it as they have a lack of own energy. You need to show that it's not OK, by moving away and thus creating a physical sign that what they are doing is not appreciated, and they get aware of what they are doing. But only if you really feel that you know what is going on, and I'm pretty sure that you do as you describe what is happening in so much detail. I can really relate to what you are writing.

After that you have shown enough times that you don't appreciate their behavior, either they will find that you are hurting their feelings (not your problem in this case), and either change their behavior or stop seeing you. Emotionally, this kind of people behave like dogs, not to be demeaning in any way, just to give you some plattform to understand why they do as they do, and how you can act to encourage a certain behavior (that don't suck the energy out of you).

You have already pointed out that he has a problem, but he won't accept it. There is not more you can do to help him (sorry I am maybe a bit codependent so don't buy into my thinking that everyone should be helped ;) ). I have learned that my energy is sacred and no-one is allowed to snitch from it. If you don't have your own, start doing some work on getting more, it's not my job to share it with you.

If the situation is unbearable you maybe should consider ending the relationship.

The question why you are attracted to those kind of guys - maybe can be because that you also have some codependent tendencies (good book on the matter - codependent no more). But that is hard for someone else who don't know you to understand. Try meditate and sit with the question for a while and answers will pop-up. As it have happened for all you last three guys, maybe it's a pattern, maybe not. If it is, it's because something in your subconscious programming is driving you towards it, some part of you that isn't healed are leading you toward unhealthy behavior. As I said, it's not sure it's a pattern, but it could be. Sitting and meditating on a certain problem and just listening to answers that come by themselves is often rewarding for me, and I could really recommend it.

Best of luck! Keep your energy for yourself, and keep us posted.

//Happyhorse
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  #12  
Old 18-02-2018, 11:51 PM
evariste evariste is offline
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Haven't posted to this forum in a while but I have been experiencing the same problem as first posted :( It's been entirely perplexing. I've gotten a lot of feedback here and in another section I posted, but nothing is quite on the money. If I spend more than a few hours around my boyfriend I still feel the symptoms. Maybe I will go into more details... 1) completely drained, like I had almost all of the life force energy sucked out of my being 2) my skin/body feels warm and nervy/irritable, almost like a certain feeling I associate with the flu (sometimes when I get the flu my skin feels nervy and when I take a shower and the water hits my skin it is almost painful... reminds me of that). 3) very un-grounded. I have been earthing and using an earthing mat for over a year and can't live without them now. After being with my boyfriend it is like the opposite feeling of being earthed. I feel a nasty static-y charge, almost like a current was being run through my body all night. Similar feeling to experiencing too many EMFs from cell phone, ect. 4) Mental drain and brainfog. To the extent that I have a difficult time functioning for the remainder of the day after he leaves, and cannot do normal tasks. Also my text messages will become littered with spelling errors. 5) Sometimes it is as if my joints have aged and are somewhat arthritic.... Still asking, what is going on?! I am not buying the emotional/psychological/codependency theory at ALL (@SpiritofZoe, OEN34, happyhorse). I was raised by a mental health therapist, know healthy boundaries, etc. This feel more like a purely energy thing. Interestingly enough I am taking a class on supernatural Chinese literature, and recently there has been a lot of material about this notion they used to have about either women (yin) or ghosts (very yin) sucking the male lifeforce energy (yang) out of the man in the story and killing him or nearly killing him. Sometimes when I've read these stories, they go into great detail about the experience and I'm thinking, "That's me!" hahaha. The catch is, me and my boyfriend are both men :) So according to that theory, would be 2 yang energies and no yin around to drain us. The other thing I've been researching is this notion in traditional Chinese medicine about the unique elemental personalities we each have. I am definitely mostly earth and water. I would say my boyfriend is fire. I don't know how that would make such a huge difference. This is all so "out there" for me. I wouldn't actually believe this stuff unless I was so desperate for an explanation. I am afraid this relationship is literally killing me by slowly draining my lifeforce energy which cannot be replaced. :'( The problem is I can't just throw my boyfriend away, he is such a good guy and loving. I have prayed many times to my "guides" and guardian angel. No clear answer. It's like a "figure it out for yourself" situation.
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  #13  
Old 19-02-2018, 07:05 AM
OEN34 OEN34 is offline
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Two options IMO:

1) If it is that draining and you are convinced it isn't a psychological issue causing these symptoms, then end the relationship and be free from it.

2) Continue with the relationship but try even harder to work on yourself adapting to the symptoms.

On one hand you're saying the relationship is literally killing you slowly (quote), yet on the other you're saying you cannot end the relationship.

What gives? You can't have your cake and eat it.

He might be the most kind, gentle and loving person in the world, but if the energy isn't matched and it's causing you issues to the point you're miserable and drained around him, then the answer is very clear IMO.

Alternatively, look at diet, water consumption, vitamins and minerals, adequate rest etc.
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  #14  
Old 19-02-2018, 08:40 PM
evariste evariste is offline
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@OEN34

I'm just hoping someone comes along and says, "Ahah, that's (insert energy explanation that makes sense), here's how to fix it." OR, if they were to say, "Ohhh... that's (alternate energy explanation), you're doomed," if it finally made sense to me what the root problem was and I believed it it would give me the confidence to end it immediately. But ending an entire relationship without knowing why I'm really doing it (just based on symptoms), seems to me like saying some body part hurts so it's best to cut it off (without even a proper diagnoses). I'm on this message board looking for a diagnoses I guess.

I've searched the internet as well... apparently this problem is quite rare, as I haven't seen a directly similar case, just some energy vampire stuff which has a similar flavor but not precisely the same as what I'm experiencing. :(
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  #15  
Old 19-02-2018, 09:10 PM
OEN34 OEN34 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by evariste
@OEN34

I'm just hoping someone comes along and says, "Ahah, that's (insert energy explanation that makes sense), here's how to fix it." OR, if they were to say, "Ohhh... that's (alternate energy explanation), you're doomed," if it finally made sense to me what the root problem was and I believed it it would give me the confidence to end it immediately. But ending an entire relationship without knowing why I'm really doing it (just based on symptoms), seems to me like saying some body part hurts so it's best to cut it off (without even a proper diagnoses). I'm on this message board looking for a diagnoses I guess.

I've searched the internet as well... apparently this problem is quite rare, as I haven't seen a directly similar case, just some energy vampire stuff which has a similar flavor but not precisely the same as what I'm experiencing. :(

Others have chipped in, but it seems you're looking for something that is in-explainable.

There may not be a proper diagnosis. You're very aware and have have very fine, accurate details to a tee, so if they're there, they're there. It is what it is.

It's a case of like it or lump it, unfortunately

Oh, and I'd absolutely end a relationship if it was causing me huge discomfort like you say, even without a diagnosis.
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  #16  
Old 27-02-2018, 02:26 PM
SpiritofZoe SpiritofZoe is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2016
Posts: 84
 
I just hope you realize there are many many possibilities for the cause of your symptoms, all of which have NOTHING to do with an intimate relationship. It comes from the environment, the air, water, food as well as energy, EMF, scalar energy, mind programming, all part of an agenda to have an unhealthy population.

Quote:
Originally Posted by evariste
Haven't posted to this forum in a while but I have been experiencing the same problem as first posted :( It's been entirely perplexing. I've gotten a lot of feedback here and in another section I posted, but nothing is quite on the money. If I spend more than a few hours around my boyfriend I still feel the symptoms. Maybe I will go into more details... 1) completely drained, like I had almost all of the life force energy sucked out of my being 2) my skin/body feels warm and nervy/irritable, almost like a certain feeling I associate with the flu (sometimes when I get the flu my skin feels nervy and when I take a shower and the water hits my skin it is almost painful... reminds me of that). 3) very un-grounded. I have been earthing and using an earthing mat for over a year and can't live without them now. After being with my boyfriend it is like the opposite feeling of being earthed. I feel a nasty static-y charge, almost like a current was being run through my body all night. Similar feeling to experiencing too many EMFs from cell phone, ect. 4) Mental drain and brainfog. To the extent that I have a difficult time functioning for the remainder of the day after he leaves, and cannot do normal tasks. Also my text messages will become littered with spelling errors. 5) Sometimes it is as if my joints have aged and are somewhat arthritic.... Still asking, what is going on?! I am not buying the emotional/psychological/codependency theory at ALL (@SpiritofZoe, OEN34, happyhorse). I was raised by a mental health therapist, know healthy boundaries, etc. This feel more like a purely energy thing. Interestingly enough I am taking a class on supernatural Chinese literature, and recently there has been a lot of material about this notion they used to have about either women (yin) or ghosts (very yin) sucking the male lifeforce energy (yang) out of the man in the story and killing him or nearly killing him. Sometimes when I've read these stories, they go into great detail about the experience and I'm thinking, "That's me!" hahaha. The catch is, me and my boyfriend are both men :) So according to that theory, would be 2 yang energies and no yin around to drain us. The other thing I've been researching is this notion in traditional Chinese medicine about the unique elemental personalities we each have. I am definitely mostly earth and water. I would say my boyfriend is fire. I don't know how that would make such a huge difference. This is all so "out there" for me. I wouldn't actually believe this stuff unless I was so desperate for an explanation. I am afraid this relationship is literally killing me by slowly draining my lifeforce energy which cannot be replaced. :'( The problem is I can't just throw my boyfriend away, he is such a good guy and loving. I have prayed many times to my "guides" and guardian angel. No clear answer. It's like a "figure it out for yourself" situation.
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  #17  
Old 28-02-2018, 05:16 PM
pluralone pluralone is offline
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Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 234
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by SpiritofZoe
I just hope you realize there are many many possibilities for the cause of your symptoms, all of which have NOTHING to do with an intimate relationship. It comes from the environment, the air, water, food as well as energy, EMF, scalar energy, mind programming, all part of an agenda to have an unhealthy population.
This is what you personally think, based on your beliefs. While I agree that there may be some major environmental factors going on here, I don't understand why you would state your opinion in this way ("I just hope you realize..."). That kind of assertion doesn't invite further conversation; it's more apt to evoke a defensive response in the OP or, less severely, no response at all. End of discussion either way. That's unfortunate; I think you may have had some interesting info to add here.
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  #18  
Old 28-03-2018, 06:02 PM
evariste evariste is offline
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Join Date: Mar 2016
Posts: 27
 
So I had a few theories about what was going on. I've been struggling with this about 6 months, been together with my boyfriend almost 1 year (symptoms didn't start until a couple months after being together). I thought it might be that he was somehow draining my energy; that he was a psychic vampire; that he had some bodily / aura / energy wound or deficiency and that I was being drained of my healer energy; that is was all in my head; etc. Bottom line I didn't want to make any moves until I had "figured it out." And for some reason beyond my pleas for insight, my guides/angels were mostly silent on the issue. I think I finally got it though. I have an answer that clicks and allows me to walk away. Basically I did an I Ching and oracle card and both said the same thing which confirms with the most recent intuition... he's an unbalanced fire element (not a mixture of elements to create balance), and I'm a water element. Basically his fire was putting out my water, evaporating off my element essence (therefore the "drain" feeling), as well as manifesting all the heat symptoms I've tried to articulate such as arthritis, staticy/achy/ungrounded feeling, fuzzy head, etc. which only appear after being around him some time. Otherwise, I'm completely fine. What's very interesting is that a Chinese person came into my life (from Singapore, Chinese nationality), who knew about the personal elements. He explained that many combinations of elements can sustain or support each other but water/fire is irreconcilable. One gets burnt up the other put out. I can't take it anymore, as I said before, I feel like the relationship was slowly draining the life out of me. Let's just say I spent a few days with him again this week and reached the end of what I could tolerate. I have no choice. I have to walk away. The problem is I feel so weak, and am concerned I lost a lot of lifeforce. I'm also afraid of his stalker/codependent nature and that I will have to put up a fight to end this. I just need some supporting words right now as I try to find autonomy and regain my strength.
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  #19  
Old 01-04-2018, 01:36 AM
SpiritofZoe SpiritofZoe is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2016
Posts: 84
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by pluralone
This is what you personally think, based on your beliefs. While I agree that there may be some major environmental factors going on here, I don't understand why you would state your opinion in this way ("I just hope you realize..."). That kind of assertion doesn't invite further conversation; it's more apt to evoke a defensive response in the OP or, less severely, no response at all. End of discussion either way. That's unfortunate; I think you may have had some interesting info to add here.

well I apologize to the poster in question if saying "I just hope you realize" sounded confrontational. Does she, the recent commenter, agree?
I can see how you might be right, but I can see how your perspective is overly sensitive - think of it this way- my passing observation and input to the comment is, gosh, there is a lot going on there physically - that's all.
There was a lot going on there physically, it's that simple. They posted their issue, asked for feedback, and some random person such as me notes, maybe you could hold off on the psychic vampire or black magic or voodoo hokey pokey and just acknowledge there is a lot of physical stuff going on. IMO it's a rational response to what he posted from someone who doesn't know much more about the situation to just suggest that maybe she or he should see a doctor, and out of concern that someone might "just hope she realizes" there is a wider array of possible interpretations here. I didn't intend it to start more discussion; I just hoped for their sake that their bases were covered.
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  #20  
Old 01-04-2018, 01:48 AM
SpiritofZoe SpiritofZoe is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2016
Posts: 84
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by evariste
So I had a few theories about what was going on. I've been struggling with this about 6 months, been together with my boyfriend almost 1 year (symptoms didn't start until a couple months after being together). I thought it might be that he was somehow draining my energy; that he was a psychic vampire; that he had some bodily / aura / energy wound or deficiency and that I was being drained of my healer energy; that is was all in my head; etc. Bottom line I didn't want to make any moves until I had "figured it out." And for some reason beyond my pleas for insight, my guides/angels were mostly silent on the issue. I think I finally got it though. I have an answer that clicks and allows me to walk away. Basically I did an I Ching and oracle card and both said the same thing which confirms with the most recent intuition... he's an unbalanced fire element (not a mixture of elements to create balance), and I'm a water element. Basically his fire was putting out my water, evaporating off my element essence (therefore the "drain" feeling), as well as manifesting all the heat symptoms I've tried to articulate such as arthritis, staticy/achy/ungrounded feeling, fuzzy head, etc. which only appear after being around him some time. Otherwise, I'm completely fine. What's very interesting is that a Chinese person came into my life (from Singapore, Chinese nationality), who knew about the personal elements. He explained that many combinations of elements can sustain or support each other but water/fire is irreconcilable. One gets burnt up the other put out. I can't take it anymore, as I said before, I feel like the relationship was slowly draining the life out of me. Let's just say I spent a few days with him again this week and reached the end of what I could tolerate. I have no choice. I have to walk away. The problem is I feel so weak, and am concerned I lost a lot of lifeforce. I'm also afraid of his stalker/codependent nature and that I will have to put up a fight to end this. I just need some supporting words right now as I try to find autonomy and regain my strength.

I hope you are feeling much better and I support whatever interpretation you want ot give the whole experience. Sounds like you are blessed and mature enough to know you are both divine beings and wish no one any harm. As I wish you no offense in questioning a paranormal interpretation; as we all know it all works together. There are times when the causes of one's symptoms might be psychosomatic or spiritual/astral/paranormal and yet for brief periods the physical manifestation of it builds up and spills out in a mess, and the picture changes... take best care of yourself and I see you strongly standing and walking away, you might meet an Air sign soon
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