Deathwish

I agree that you should live life to the fullest and take what you can while you are here. Although, it is good that you do not fear death. Life, while is a temporary state, it is just as important as what waits for us on the other side. Although I must say, I am determined to ake sure that this life is my last incarnation, even if I were promised a beautiful,happy life after this one, hell no. I will Pass!

Completely understand, you'll be home soon enough my friend, be patient :>)

Originally Posted by rainbowcrow

Yes Childheart, I have felt like this for as long as I can remember. My life has just always felt temporary. It is nice to know that it's not only me that feels this. I just wish that I had a set of instructions that outlined my purpose in this life lol.

rc

Where's the adventure in that though?
I think that all of us, to different degrees, has a purpose of serving others. (Nearly(?)) Every occupation is helpful to others in some way.. So how would you like to do your best- to make life better for others as well as yourself?

Ha ha ha, how right you are Childheart! And I do agree with you that each of our lives should touch others in a positive way, from the smallest gesture to the biggest sacrifice, so long as it is done with love

rc xo

Well, I can definitely relate to looking forward to the day death finally comes a calling. My passion for helping others, including earthbound trapped spirits, has left me feeling so drained, that I'm just worn out. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm sure there's still a bunch more people/spirits that need my help, but I really am getting very tired from a lifetime of serving others. Lately, it's just been getting harder and harder to keep myself going when so many just see my compassion as a resource to be exploited. I need a break. Whether it be through death, or a positive life changing event, I'm getting to the point to where I just don't care any more.

[Sarian]

Sadly, since I was 3 and 4 I began to feel this way, but yet knew I had to be here... Now all these years later, sometimes I get so grief stricken and distraught because I'm not sure of the purpose...

My 2p, for what it's worth. One cannot participate fully in the joys and wonders of this life with one foot in the door towards a possible "next life". Death in this mortal life will come when it comes. Why go searching for a permanent exit from this state of reality? Death is on the horizon for everyone; we need not fear death or strive towards it. Look to satisfy your spiritual yearnings in the present moment.

[Internal Queries]

when i was a little kid, like 5-6 years old, i'd stand on the outside of the railing on the back porch which was located on the top story of our house. facing forward i'd hang out over the edge and try to will myself to let go so i'd fall head first onto the concrete below. or i'd try to will myself to jump out in front of a car. i delighted in freaking my friends out doing really dangerous crazy stuff. and it's a miracle i survived my teen years. yikes!

and yet ... here i am. the instinct for survival overrode my desire to escape. i don't yearn for escape nowadays so much as for the Love i didn't receive from those who were supposed to be nurturing me when i was young.

Hugs to you Internal Queries

Originally Posted by Internal Queries

i don't yearn for escape nowadays so much as for the Love i didn't receive from those who were supposed to be nurturing me when i was young.

I think you just said it all right there.

I think my biggest problem with fighting for reasons to keep going, is that there has always been a serious lack of love in my life. No matter how much I do to try and put love, hope and understanding back into the world, it has yet to really make its way back to me long enough to sustain me enough for the remaining duration of this lifetime. Or perhaps even the remaining durations of my soul's lifetime, I don't know.

Even amongst all the various degrees of enlightened people out there, there is still this stigma that disrupts the flow of true love, hope and understanding for everyone. We're constantly trying to sway people to our own personal beliefs too much, instead of just understanding, accepting and loving each other for our differences, as well as our similarities. It's just too easy to sit there and tell someone else they are not as enlightened as we are, or that they're just being mislead from the "real" truth, instead of truly showing them enough love to be understanding and accepting of the things we don't agree with.

Yes, I do understand the need or desire to have such immense diversity as a way of feeling more complete. But does that also not segregate us into too many smaller groups just a little too much at times? And what happens when you simply can't find enough people who are similar enough to you, to make you feel like you actually are a part of something bigger? Where is our feeling of completeness then? Where is all this love, hope and understanding, when we cling to our needs and desires for diversity so much?

I should probably shut up now.