The Art Of Forgetting

[thespiritual1]

I was scrolling my phone when I came across the name of a person that was once a friend but later turned into a foe. He was not my lover or anything. Just a normal friend, with whom I did not get along and we ended up with a fight. As time passed, I forgot about him and I do not like to remember him, but I noticed that I am unintentionally thinking about him and remembering the past. I did not want to recall this past, However it all happened so simultaneously that I could not prevent this from happening.
It started when I was in a relaxed state, just browsing my phone. I came across his name and before I could realize what is happening to me, a lot of memories that I did not want to recall had been recalled. It all happened when I came across the name. So I notice that the name works like a trigger to recall all the memories related to it. Although it is important that I remember stuff that I need to remember but I notice that the process of remembering is out of my control. This got me thinking upto how much control do I have over my memory and this remembering process.
I know I can prevent my self from looking at the name, which will prevent any memory related to it from resurfacing and In case that I have already looked at the name and its memories have resurfaced, I can just concentrate on other things, which will make me forget about this unwanted memory. But I wonder if I can look at his name and prevent the associated memories of him, from entering into my head or surfacing into the conciousness? This will be a very tricky thing to do. It seems almost impossible to control. I wonder if any of you spiritual masters can do this, or have such control over your memory?

[Sapphirez]

hi thespiritual1 I think this is an interesting topic about the art of forgetting, and also what's associated with remembering.. but it seems you are specifically looking for a technique to help you overcome unwelcome memories and thoughts so luckily that is something I'm more familiar with than the topics in general. I know of a technique which there's actually a section of this forum devoted to, though you may find more information, insight and instructions useful about it elsewhere online, and in books too.


It's called Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) and there are some other variations too like Emotional Self Management (ESM) of which I have a nice book about called 'Instant Emotional Healing' anyways, it's a rather simple technique though it has profound far-reaching effects and can be quite a complex healer. Basically it involves tapping on a handful of acupressure points on the body, primarily the face, and saying what may be summed up as affirmations. I'll wrap this up here so you can explore it on your own if you wish, but if you want me to share any more information or details about it I'll be glad to do that too.

There are many youtube videos you can follow along with, or you can learn the basics and do it entirely on your own too. It doesn't take very long, but to get to deep roots of issues and unravel all sorts of things that may've been plaguing you it can take more time and commitment. but anyways, the beauty of this technique is it's actually been clinically studied and research confirms its incredible efficacy, even if it seems like the silliest thing upon first glance and bare investigation. (and when you do it yourself I can admit you will probably feel silly doing it, but it's worth it) I think learning and using this technique, or using it as a spin-off to make your own unique version will help you a great deal. If you try it please give it a chance and let me know how it goes.

[ocean breeze]

You can always rely on techniques which only suppresses the memories. Deep down still carrying this fear.

When unwanted memories of the past resurfaces, i consider it a blessing. The universe telling me that i still haven't made peace with my past. And that perhaps that is the next step i should take. To make peace with it, then finally let go of it.