Reacting or Not Reacting to Violence

[blackraven]

Originally Posted by Vinayaka

I boycott it as much as possible. If we all did, Hollywood would no longer make such shows. I feel like the schoolyard watcher cheering on the fight, but of course in a less subtle way.

So it's like stealing a grand, or a penny, the principle remains the same.

Vinayaka - I think you're right about if there were more boycotting of violence in films and on TV programs, there would be less production of it. Hollywood imitates life and life imitates Hollywood.

Blackraven

[IsleWalker]

Originally Posted by blackraven

IsleWalker - I would so much like to have your attitude! It seems much healthier than mine. I guess the pain I feel is driving me a bit crazy. Perhaps I need to take a break from watching, reading and listening to too much violence in the world. I've taken a hiatus from meditating. Not sure why, but it's something I need to get my self back to in order to become centered and less concerned with all the madness in the world. Thanks for your input, IsleWalker.

Blackraven--

What helped me most to actually feel this calm acceptance is a book about a channeled entity called Emmanuel. Now I don't really like the idea of channeled entities, because the person through whom the channeling comes, often gets in the middle of it.

I just stumbled across this book, but it's been one of those that I just can't get rid of because I keep it by my bedside for those times that the world or my life seems to be spinning out of control. I turn to a random page, and suddenly I feel calm and loving and understanding of what is going on around me and why everyone is doing what they are doing.

Unfortunately I don't stay in this mood all the time, but it's worth the price for the book to be able to find it. It may be an ebook too.

It's called Emmanuel's Book by Pat Rodegast and Judith Stanton. Maybe it can help you find some peace with this.

Lora

[blackraven]

Originally Posted by IsleWalker

Blackraven--

What helped me most to actually feel this calm acceptance is a book about a channeled entity called Emmanuel. Now I don't really like the idea of channeled entities, because the person through whom the channeling comes, often gets in the middle of it.

I just stumbled across this book, but it's been one of those that I just can't get rid of because I keep it by my bedside for those times that the world or my life seems to be spinning out of control. I turn to a random page, and suddenly I feel calm and loving and understanding of what is going on around me and why everyone is doing what they are doing.

Unfortunately I don't stay in this mood all the time, but it's worth the price for the book to be able to find it. It may be an ebook too.

It's called Emmanuel's Book by Pat Rodegast and Judith Stanton. Maybe it can help you find some peace with this.

Lora

Thank you IsleWalker! I will try to find this book.

Blackraven

[Gem]

In a simplistic sense, we have compassion for victims and there's social mechanisms to help them, but very little is done to address the violence itself.

One main problem is that people who are kind, and dedicated to human service, are repulsed by violence and it upsets their sentiments, which is understandable. For example, a woman I know worked with families and child abuse, which a a hard job, but when she had a little baby of her own, she couldn't do that kind of work any longer.

The point is, we can take the victim out of the crime much more easily that we can take the crime out of the criminal, so we have a stockpile of violent people who rotate through the criminal justice system...

The protection of victims is important and society does do a lot to help survivors of violence, but the perpetrators simply move on to their next victim, and therefore the source on violence remains unaddressed, and violence continues as part of society.

[blackraven]

Originally Posted by Gem

The point is, we can take the victim out of the crime much more easily that we can take the crime out of the criminal, so we have a stockpile of violent people who rotate through the criminal justice system...

Gem - I believe society in general tends to work more with victims then with criminals. I hadn’t thought of violence in society this way. You’re right in that perpetrators go on committing crimes and their makeup that drives them to these crimes goes untreated; they just go to prison for a short stint. And those that go uncaught just keep going after innocent victims.

I’m so tired of hearing on the news how often drivers hit a walking person along side the road and just keep on driving, leaving them dead. I wouldn’t do that to a deer or a dog! I’d stop, check on them and call for emergency personnel.

The story you told about the woman that works with victims is so pertinent. Having worked in a setting like this I know when you have people at home or in your family that you care about, these kinds of cases become more personal and it’s harder to be objective and effective.

I’m inspired by the resilience of victims in society that persevere after crimes have been committed against them. It’s a much better way of getting through the rest of life, rather than giving up and sinking into a cyclical victim of everything. That’s when the original crime just holds the victim captive. Then again some things just break the human spirit.

Blackraven

[IsleWalker]

Blackraven-

I also want to point out that the more you focus on these kind of events, the more you will see. It becomes a vicious cycle.

I'm not advocating you "don't see"--just that you remember that your thoughts create reality in your own world, so thinking "the world is so cruel"--will eventually become your reality.

Find the examples of behavior that you would want for yourself and for the world, and focus on those. Just a suggestion.

Lora

Originally Posted by blackraven

I'd like to be one of those kind of people that cares enough to get involved personally and make a difference, but unfortunately I leave it up to others. That is why I feel as guilty as the criminal sometimes.

Blackraven

Please don't feel guilt over this ...
I was an activist for civil rights & women's rights back in the 70's ...
It was brutal & took alot of me ...
You have to possess great strength to not give up on people as well as stamina to keep fighting for changes in the future ...

What I find more disturbing closer to home is the bullying I see on-line ...

[Gem]

It's not that I create the violent world or anything, It's out there and from the grand pooh bah to the drunk, there is war in the world. They say ignorance is bliss because our private world is far more bearable when we live in a cocoon.

In my view, it's reckless to say that we as individuals create our own violent world because individuals who are perpetrators of violence usually blame their victims (they justify it in their own minds), and victims will believe their aggressor to some degree.

Depends really; personal lives and society are completely different contexts.

[IsleWalker]

Gem--

Not sure if you were responding to my post or not, but I want to address two things you brought up.

I wasn't implying that people create their own violent worlds--I was saying that the more you focus on violent worlds, the more you notice.

And I also wasn't saying that ignorance of what is going on around us is the answer. I was talking about a simultaneous acceptance that it happens and gaining the wisdom to see it for what it is--learning by someone, somewhere, whole societies. It is choices being made. If not all choices are allowed, then we never learn what the consequences of them are.

I'm not condoning the choices, I just don't control them. And if you spend your life thinking you can, that will make you crazy!!

Lora

[Gem]

Originally Posted by IsleWalker

Gem--

Not sure if you were responding to my post or not, but I want to address two things you brought up.

I wasn't implying that people create their own violent worlds--I was saying that the more you focus on violent worlds, the more you notice.

And I also wasn't saying that ignorance of what is going on around us is the answer. I was talking about a simultaneous acceptance that it happens and gaining the wisdom to see it for what it is--learning by someone, somewhere, whole societies. It is choices being made. If not all choices are allowed, then we never learn what the consequences of them are.

I'm not condoning the choices, I just don't control them. And if you spend your life thinking you can, that will make you crazy!!

Lora

I always thought that people don't actually look into violence because it's a nasty bit of work, and the issue is largely ignored, so never really resolved, but if people really did look into it, violence would have a hard time surviving in society... and it's worth noting that most violence occurs behind closed doors, and most abuse or murder is perpetrated by a person the victim knows. It survives in secrecy.

Choice is complicated because people have different kinds of pressures on them, and there's ways of disempowering people... and trauma causes stress disorders which also incapacitate individuals... so choice and empowerment are partners, which means a victim has the choice to remain it or return to a violent situation, which is most often the case.

I would like to work with perpetrators of violence so as to root out the cause of violence, but they don't often seek assistence... I mean there is usually a guilt and shame involved with the anger episodes, and it's like, I'm so sorry I'll never do it again, and then, pow biff smash, and around and around it goes.

The other problem is, society isn't compassionate toward perpetrators, so it's more difficult to get funding to be used to assist violent people to break the cycle they're caught up in.

Actually, I believe it needs to be looked into more and more deeply, and turning a blind eye and taking a save the victim approach isn't really reducing the incidence of violence in society.