When your partner is sceptical?

[Harmony1007]

I’m 50 & have been married 24 years.
Having experienced ‘awakening’ recently, both psychological & spiritual (accidental kundalini), after years of not really understanding what was happening to me...pain, constant hot flushes, being a doormat to most around me. Not comprehending why some very nice people would tell me I’m an old soul, ask me if I saw colours & auras... told me I was ‘different‘. One lovely friend told me I was an ‘enigma’ & I couldn’t see it.
Since Awakening my 15 years of pain & debilitating hot flushes have stopped. My perception of everything around me has changed. I’m not afraid anymore.
I have changed the dynamics in all my friendships, my relationships with family & my husband, just by being true to myself.
I’ve gradually told my husband of my spiritual experiences, the signs I’ve encountered, the energy I frequently see, what I experienced during my awakening, the colours, & how I was astounded & amazed to see my own aura.
He looks at me like I’m a nutter each time I tell him something new. In fact, he seems quite empty, which leads me to think that deep down he knows it’s true & is worried it might take me away from him, although he would not admit this.

Has anyone encountered similar issues in their relationships? My emotions feel ‘flat’ now. I don’t get angry or stressed about anything as I feel I understand people’s behaviour & egos & the reasons behind them.

I would be very honoured to hear your thoughts on this.

[iamthat]

You are on your path of learning and growth,and your husband is on his. It sounds as if you are further along than your husband, and it seems quite common for one partner in a relationship to be more spiritually advanced than the other. No doubt there are karmic reasons why you are together, and there are lessons for both of you in your relationship.

You say that your husband does not understand when you share your experiences and you think that deep down he knows that what you say is true. This is possible. Or it may be that he was comfortable with the old you, and he simply doesn't know what to make of the changes within you. And yes, he probably does feel threatened by these changes because they are outside his understanding.

Perhaps the question is, do you and your husband still have enough in common to enjoy each other's company? Or is there a widening gulf between you which is getting harder to bridge? You have to be true to yourself and what is happening to you, but you also have to accept that your husband may never be ready to understand what is happening. If he is afraid of losing you then maybe you need to show him that your awakening does not threaten your relationship. Then he might be more comfortable with these changes.

Good luck.

[Harmony1007]

Originally Posted by iamthat

Perhaps the question is, do you and your husband still have enough in common to enjoy each other's company? Or is there a widening gulf between you which is getting harder to bridge? You have to be true to yourself and what is happening to you, but you also have to accept that your husband may never be ready to understand what is happening. If he is afraid of losing you then maybe you need to show him that your awakening does not threaten your relationship. Then he might be more comfortable with these changes.

Good luck.

I agree totally. Thank you for your kind advice. Only time will tell, as they say 🤔

[carebear]

I personally don't care what my partner thinks about my beliefs, tbh He has his own. I have my own.

I something think couples like to fight about anything and or nothing when all they really have to do is enjoy each other

[iamthat]

Originally Posted by carebear

I personally don't care what my partner thinks about my beliefs, tbh He has his own. I have my own.

I something think couples like to fight about anything and or nothing when all they really have to do is enjoy each other

Having different beliefs need not be an issue. It is more of an issue when you realise that you and your partner want different things in life and are moving in different directions. Then you have to ask yourself "Can we be happy spending the next thirty years together?" Some couples seem happy leading quite separate lives while still being a couple. Others may decide that they would rather be with someone who shares their ideas and goals.

People change over time. Who we are in our 50s may be quite different from who we were in our 20s. So relationships also change, for better or for worse.

Peace

[Harmony1007]

Originally Posted by iamthat

Having different beliefs need not be an issue. It is more of an issue when you realise that you and your partner want different things in life and are moving in different directions. Then you have to ask yourself "Can we be happy spending the next thirty years together?" Some couples seem happy leading quite separate lives while still being a couple. Others may decide that they would rather be with someone who shares their ideas and goals.

People change over time. Who we are in our 50s may be quite different from who we were in our 20s. So relationships also change, for better or for worse.

Peace

Yes, undoubtedly this is a learning curve for both us, and we do share a lot of other ideas & goals. Hearing your replies has helped me put it into perspective.
I know it can work, I guess now the real question is do I want it to? I guess my higher self will be quite busy over next few months 🤔

[Starman]

Harmony1007, as a former college teacher I had a female student who had been in a marriage a long time, and her husband was jealous of her getting and education, and also felt threatened by her pursuing such. This is a common experience. Especially in the traditional mindset of males who feel they are “king” of their castle, provider, protector, etc. Many feel like they have lost, or are losing, control of their kingdom, which includes their spouse. It is purely the result of a very fragile ego.

You may, or may not want to address this directly; there are consequences either way. I have learned that I must be careful who I share with, and how much of my spiritual experiences I share. Yes, we want to share these things with those who are closest to us, and possibly invite them to join us on this wonderful expansive journey. But your spouse may not be ready, just like for many years you were not ready.

It took me decades to become accepting of a reality far removed from the prevalent everyday reality that is pervasive in our society. The experience, once embraced, is so dynamic you can not help but want to share it. But I learned I have to find like minds, those who are more receptive, because everyone grows, or travels, at their own pace. I was not open to someone telling me but I was open to someone showing me.

Your presence alone can change people in ways where words may have failed. View this as a test, or and opportunity, to share on another level. Radiate love and light, and that will eventually grab your husbands’ consciousness, as well as the awareness of others. It is a matter of becoming sensitized. You might want to invite him to practice meditation with you, or yoga, tai chi, or try sensual massage together. If you do it together it may lessen the perceived threat. There are lots of books and websites on things couples can do together for spiritual development. Start small and simple and don’t use too many words.

Peace and Good Journey

[Harmony1007]

Originally Posted by Starman

Harmony1007,

You may, or may not want to address this directly; there are consequences either way. I have learned that I must be careful who I share with, and how much of my spiritual experiences I share. Yes, we want to share these things with those who are closest to us, and possibly invite them to join us on this wonderful expansive journey. But your spouse may not be ready, just like for many years you were not ready.

It took me decades to become accepting of a reality far removed from the prevalent everyday reality that is pervasive in our society. The experience, once embraced, is so dynamic you can not help but want to share it. But I learned I have to find like minds, those who are more receptive, because everyone grows, or travels, at their own pace. I was not open to someone telling me but I was open to someone showing me:

Thank you for giving me the benefit of your experience, it’s so good to know there’s a lot of support out there & likeminded people.

Last night I did tell my husband in detail of some of my experiences. I asked if he believed me. He said ‘you only ever tell the truth, I’ve no reason not to believe you, what an amazing gift to have’. It was a gamble but I think it’s paid off 😍

[Sunshine111]

Originally Posted by Harmony1007

Thank you for giving me the benefit of your experience, it’s so good to know there’s a lot of support out there & likeminded people.

Last night I did tell my husband in detail of some of my experiences. I asked if he believed me. He said ‘you only ever tell the truth, I’ve no reason not to believe you, what an amazing gift to have’. It was a gamble but I think it’s paid off 😍

I am so happy for you Harmony, so glad that it paid off!!!

I love your husband's answer/response and the outcome so much!!!

It paid off because you are brave and not just honest, brave to tell the truth and speak from your heart!.

Lucky fellow!

All the best, take care.

[Harmony1007]

Originally Posted by Sunshine111

I am so happy for you Harmony, so glad that it paid off!!!

I love your husband's answer/response and the outcome so much!!!

It paid off because you are brave and not just honest, brave to tell the truth and speak from your heart!.

Lucky fellow!

All the best, take care.

Ahh my sunshine, thank you. Your kind words made my day yesterday, and you’ve done it again today