WHY I TRY NOT TO JUDGE OTHERS

(To me) the important thing is not to JUDGE others for whatever is their behavior. Maybe your right. Maybe a person is displaying an unhealthy need for approval. If that is the case then wouldnt the lovely thing to do be to bless them and pray they find their need for approval from within.

The other reason i think its important not to judge others is, when we do we are just manifesting and sustaining that kind of energy and judgementalness in our own personal reality.

I believe everything we think is reciprocal, with every judgemental thought, we reap what we sow. We cause others to be judgemental of us.

You're right in that we should value people as individuals which means allowing them their behaviour, foibles, habits and on. But spiritually we are allowed our likes, dislikes and indifferences. To like or dislike something isn't judgement as long as we don't weigh them in on our moral weighbridge.

However, when circumstances demand that we interact with others we're forced to make some judgements. Just part of living. Depends what the occasion is. Work and play may be different, maybe not. We have a right (so I'd guess from this forum) to "defend" our spirituality so if what we can glean about another or their situation doesn't accord with that - a judgement - we can decline the interaction. Part of judging concerns whether we can learn by deferring judgement and letting things take their course.

It's a complex subject but here on terra firma we have to get through with the least discomfort to ourselves...otherwise we just make the terror firmer!

[teak.]

Originally Posted by Lorelyen

You're right in that we should value people as individuals which means allowing them their behaviour, foibles, habits and on. But spiritually we are allowed our likes, dislikes and indifferences. To like or dislike something isn't judgement as long as we don't weigh them in on our moral weighbridge.

However, when circumstances demand that we interact with others we're forced to make some judgements. Just part of living. Depends what the occasion is. Work and play may be different, maybe not. We have a right (so I'd guess from this forum) to "defend" our spirituality so if what we can glean about another or their situation doesn't accord with that - a judgement - we can decline the interaction. Part of judging concerns whether we can learn by deferring judgement and letting things take their course.

It's a complex subject but here on terra firma we have to get through with the least discomfort to ourselves...otherwise we just make the terror firmer!

Yes! So agree with this.

Most humans are making judgments all the time. It's likely how our species survived so long (determining which plants, animals, people would be dangerous to us, which places would make safe homes, etc.). Now a lot of our judgments aren't needed for survival. The instinct to make them remains.

Originally Posted by Lorelyen

You're right in that we should value people as individuals which means allowing them their behaviour, foibles, habits and on. But spiritually we are allowed our likes, dislikes and indifferences. To like or dislike something isn't judgement as long as we don't weigh them in on our moral weighbridge.

However, when circumstances demand that we interact with others we're forced to make some judgements. Just part of living. Depends what the occasion is. Work and play may be different, maybe not. We have a right (so I'd guess from this forum) to "defend" our spirituality so if what we can glean about another or their situation doesn't accord with that - a judgement - we can decline the interaction. Part of judging concerns whether we can learn by deferring judgement and letting things take their course.

It's a complex subject but here on terra firma we have to get through with the least discomfort to ourselves...otherwise we just make the terror firmer!

I don't have time to read all the posts but I'll add here I agree with you. Plus, there is a such thing as constructive criticism judging. Judging gets such a bad rap and it isn't a dirty word most people think it is.

Psychics/people with excellent instincts may not say the thoughts aloud but many of us judge constantly within ourselves because we know how people are and it's a good way to avoid spiritual, emotional and even physical harm.

I'm a huge defender of judging. It's helped to keep me away from a lot of horrible experiences in the past. It's human nature. And with a combination of using common sense, it's a wise thing to do.

I know I'm in the minority about this, but then again, I tend to go against the grain on a lot of things--lol!

Originally Posted by LorriePaige

I don't have time to read all the posts but I'll add here I agree with you. Plus, there is a such thing as constructive criticism judging. Judging gets such a bad rap and it isn't a dirty word most people think it is.

Psychics/people with excellent instincts may not say the thoughts aloud but many of us judge constantly within ourselves because we know how people are and it's a good way to avoid spiritual, emotional and even physical harm.

I'm a huge defender of judging. It's helped to keep me away from a lot of horrible experiences in the past. It's human nature. And with a combination of using common sense, it's a wise thing to do.

I know I'm in the minority about this, but then again, I tend to go against the grain on a lot of things--lol!

To me it would be a saint who never, ever judges, just allows individuals to be themselves with no "like, dislike, indifferent" judgement; no decisions about whether to indulge the person's habits, modus operandi, etc. "Oh, right. You're a rapist. Well, I have no opinion about that or you at all...."

I have never met such an entity among humans I know and anyone with their feet on the ground who claims they never judge or feel negative when they do judge are victims of delusion....or doormats. So you judge that you like someone...? Negative? Do leave off. I have met a few who say "I don't judge but.....(predicate)". How can anyone get through the day without assessing anything?
...

[Terra Tourist]

Originally Posted by Robertj

(To me) the important thing is not to JUDGE others for whatever is their behavior. Maybe your right. Maybe a person is displaying an unhealthy need for approval. If that is the case then wouldnt the lovely thing to do be to bless them and pray they find their need for approval from within.

Hi Robertj

I know you have your heart in the best place, but I'm just going to be the devil's advocate here for a moment...

If a person is displaying an 'unhealthy' need for approval, in your estimation, then you have already judged them to be (a) unhealthy (b) less than perfect in some way. Bottom line, you have judged them.

To add to that, praying for someone because you have judged them to be 'unhealthy' or less than perfect in some way is an action - albeit a passive aggressive action - but an action nonetheless to remedy their pre-judged imperfection.

We certainly can judge a person's behaviour to be unprofitable for your particular path, it's sensible to hold that power of discrimination, however, unless that person is causing you great harm, then perhaps it's best to accept your perceived differences and carry on with your journey. Their actions are relevant to their path. Perhaps their 'unhealthy' behaviour is a gift to you, to mirror back to you what you see flawed about yourself (?)...perhaps.

So, in general, it seems to be a sensible approach to be wise and discriminate towards certain behaviours, but perhaps it's not so wise to get too involved in another person's path.

[joyfirst]

Originally Posted by Terra Tourist

Hi Robertj

I know you have your heart in the best place, but I'm just going to be the devil's advocate here for a moment...

If a person is displaying an 'unhealthy' need for approval, in your estimation, then you have already judged them to be (a) unhealthy (b) less than perfect in some way. Bottom line, you have judged them.

To add to that, praying for someone because you have judged them to be 'unhealthy' or less than perfect in some way is an action - albeit a passive aggressive action - but an action nonetheless to remedy their pre-judged imperfection.

We certainly can judge a person's behaviour to be unprofitable for your particular path, it's sensible to hold that power of discrimination, however, unless that person is causing you great harm, then perhaps it's best to accept your perceived differences and carry on with your journey. Their actions are relevant to their path. Perhaps their 'unhealthy' behaviour is a gift to you, to mirror back to you what you see flawed about yourself (?)...perhaps.

So, in general, it seems to be a sensible approach to be wise and discriminate towards certain behaviours, but perhaps it's not so wise to get too involved in another person's path.

You go very deep.
There is broader perspective, from which everything is perfect, in which we just are and do not even think, so definitions are not needed to begin with. That's why being in the now feels so good - we connect to our essence and eternalness.
When we think though, we define, we think about our strategies and plan. So when we see a dramatic person, we define him or her as such and make decisions based on that, if we want to keep in touch with that person. If we feel disgusted or angry, then we judge, I think. When we make moral value decisions, then we judge. When we make decisions simply based on wanted/unwanted plane without reducing in our minds intrinsic value of that person, is that still judgment?

[Howla Dark]

It's good not to judge. On my experience I often fail to come across as non-judgemental. It overlaps with my ability to sense another person's feelings and read their actions and body language. I often feel able to tell what the other person feels and thinks about me or someone and I base it one that.

[dream jo]

try noy 2 judg any 1 had plent pele judg me i hav it alwazy seam2 be 1s it dos wrse thn me

100% true, Robertj. When we allow ourselves to judge other people, all we do is inviting negative emotions in our own life. That results in underachievement, low self-esteem and procrastination.