what are men attracted to in women

[Kaere]

Originally Posted by im.actually.you

i would love a woman to be bold, free spirited, have good humor, fearless, loving, understanding, compassionate, passionate, chill, freaky, and focused.

if you're out there let me know lol

Sorry, I'm taken

[Silver]

Originally Posted by Alternate Carpark

But then again...if sex is popular because there is nothing to talk about..
then why, in so many marriages where the couples have stopped talking to each other,
the sex has stopped too?

Man, you must be everywhere, what are you doing in all those people's bedrooms and lives? L-O-L

I think it's only certain issues that people stop talking about, not talk in general?

[Roselove]

Originally Posted by Kaere

Sorry, I'm taken

LOL! i'm actually you add confused, emotional and paranoid to your list and i'm yours lol

Originally Posted by Silvergirl

Man, you must be everywhere, what are you doing in all those people's bedrooms and lives? L-O-L

They're not in the bedroom, they aren't having sex, remember.

I think it's only certain issues that people stop talking about, not talk in general?

Please list these certain issues that are not spoken of when couples stop having sex any more.

Being open and honest with the man they are with and to themselves.
Knows what give and take means (50%/50%)
Trusting and trustworthy.
Knows how to cherish and be cherished.
Knows the value of one's word and the word of others.
To know the power of love when they receive it and the power they have to destroy the man that loves them, as he hopes she won't, but is given to her and received knowing this.

Originally Posted by kpo6969

Being open and honest with the man they are with and to themselves.
Knows what give and take means (50%/50%)
Trusting and trustworthy.
Knows how to cherish and be cherished.
Knows the value of one's word and the word of others.
To know the power of love when they receive it and the power they have to destroy the man that loves them, as he hopes she won't, but is given to her and received knowing this.

I find it interesting you list being open and honest. I find most men incapable of handling that in a partner!

Give and take and compromise are certainly needed in any good relationship.

Trusting? Depends. Have you earned her trust?

Trustworthy... certainly. That is a matter of inner character and integrity.

Knows how to cherish and be cherished? Most of us love, therefore most cherish. There's no "knowing how" to it. As for BEING cherished and loved, that's likewise easy and comes naturally when you know you are loved.

Knowing the value of one's word (and the word of others) ties in with honesty and trustworthiness.

Knowing the power of love to destroy the man who loves her?
Sorry, I don't buy that. What you describe is not love. Love does not destroy. If a man believes himself destroyed by love, he needs to re-examine what he defines as "love". True love wants the object of one's love to be happy and fulfilled above all things.

IMO

Originally Posted by LightFilledHeart

I find it interesting you list being open and honest. I find most men incapable of handling that in a partner!

Give and take and compromise are certainly needed in any good relationship.

Trusting? Depends. Have you earned her trust?

Trustworthy... certainly. That is a matter of inner character and integrity.

Knows how to cherish and be cherished? Most of us love, therefore most cherish. There's no "knowing how" to it. As for BEING cherished and loved, that's likewise easy and comes naturally when you know you are loved.

Knowing the value of one's word (and the word of others) ties in with honesty and trustworthiness.

Knowing the power of love to destroy the man who loves her?
Sorry, I don't buy that. What you describe is not love. Love does not destroy. If a man believes himself destroyed by love, he needs to re-examine what he defines as "love". True love wants the object of one's love to be happy and fulfilled above all things.

IMO

Love does not destroy

What if it was based on lies, deceit, and deception?

True love wants the object of one's love to be happy and fulfilled above all things.

I couldn't agree more and they know it. So why do the lies and deceit and deception still play like a broken record in my head some 2 years later?

Thank you for your reply, it just seems I'll never know why.

[Silver]

Originally Posted by Alternate Carpark

They're not in the bedroom, they aren't having sex, remember.

Please list these certain issues that are not spoken of when couples stop having sex any more.

Well, people still have to sleep! LOL.

money, jealousy issues, stuff like that, all the mundane **** and jealousy stuff...

It's the one thing they aren't talking about that could lead to having 'it' - SEX!

What if it was based on lies, deceit, and deception?

In my considered opinion, lies, deceipt and deception have nothing what-so-ever to do with love but are the tools of the ego

Thank you for your reply, it just seems I'll never know why.

As I said, lies, deceipt and deception are not expressions of love. Whoever expressed them to you did not feel love for you, and therein lies the answer to your question.

[Perspective]

Originally Posted by LightFilledHeart

What if it was based on lies, deceit, and deception?

In my considered opinion, lies, deceipt and deception have nothing what-so-ever to do with love but are the tools of the ego

Thank you for your reply, it just seems I'll never know why.

As I said, lies, deceipt and deception are not expressions of love. Whoever expressed them to you did not feel love for you, and therein lies the answer to your question.

This reminds me of a couple of quotes I have around...

"There are people who love you dearly,
but simply do not know how to express or show their feelings."

I've had my share of heart-breaks too & I know there is a tendancy
to wall people off - to avoid getting hurt again... So I remind myself of this...

"There is no magic pill. There is no Prince (or Princess) charming who will come & solve all your problems. If you want to feel fulfilled, alive & happy, you first must endure some pain. This may mean weeping, raging, & an aching heart. It may mean long stretches of feeling alone & unhappy. The alternative is to cut off your feelings, dull your senses, & shrink from life. In the end, if you avoid pain, you'll love less, feel less, be less. True fulfillment comes at some cost."

No pain, no gain? lol Actually, it's not that funny. It can be heart-wrenching - both being deceived & realizing how we've deceived ourselves.
I think that loving, really loving others, exposing ourselves (emotionally with our clothes on lol) - can be scarey. What if we're rejected - or taken for granted?
But if we don't take the risk & always live in our little safety zones, then we miss out on what makes living most meaningful.
And if we do open ourselves up & get hurt, how much sweeter love, laughter, peace & joy are... when we feel it again.