Work Colleague - Potential TF

[Akira]

Hello There
One of the basic truths here is that relationships are complex regardless of whether or not we wrap them up with the twin flame label.

Labels are just that, labels - they do not help us. In fact as my other half regularly says they are window dressing, sent to entice us to purchase etc etc.

The main thing here, is be careful what you wish for, the twin flame connection is the hardest most intolerable journey, when a genuine tf experience starts up, often the pair run as far away from one another as they can, when the real tests start.

I would look at this a different way - the Japanese and Chinese have something they call the red string of fate, there are other cultures where the thread/string is golden. This string links us to others and it is not specific to love connections, it embraces all our connections and the roles that they play in our life.

We are after all spiritual beings, having a human experience. In these connections, we learn something about ourselves, whatever we need to learn. Yes, they are important, they will change us, re-align us and help us to move forward in life with maybe a different view of the world.

However, they are not there to make us crazy and often knowing about the tf theory does this. If you are wondering if another is your tf, drop the label. Usually when they are your tf, you just know. Although, I am not saying here that this connection is not a tf one.

What I am saying is that when you release the need for it to be anything and enjoy the connection for what it is, as the red string of fate says you will be able to clear some of the tangles of the thread. Gain clarity as to the purpose of your connection through your own inner feelings and work with them as opposed to what you may think, want or need the connection to be.

Remember you don't even need to be connecting to someone in some ways for the lessons/experiences to be imparted to you. You say that she dis-connected from you, accept this. Let go for the need to be anything more than it is, the pain is an internal war with self, work with it release it and clear it. As for your job, it's your decision, however I would counsel against being too hasty. Release any meaning that you have created around this, see things for what they are and get on with enjoying your life.

When we question something, become confused, want the thing we are not in alignment with love, we are in alignment with fear. Release the need for this to be anything at all and explore your feelings for what they are...

[leader_of_ten]

Originally posted by Lorelyen

If you'll excuse my saying so, I love your writing style!

My comment about 'it's as simple as that' just referred to the phenomenon. Call a twin flame a phenomenon, relationship, whatever you choose but if it's a false, a logical 'not' then it's still a not. Attaching a label is fine as long as semiotically it has meaning. So I reckoned a false twin is a not-twin and somehow that origin of false twin came into being for reasons I suspect rather than substantiate. I believe that in 99% of cases it's a con even if not deliberate. It's a way of trying to pin someone down to a long lasting relationship by quasi-spiritual means so ownership of someone's emotions, their compliance, in aeternum, as an entitlement. No cynicism on my part. Millions of life-long relationships exist without the participants ever being aware of the Blavatsky/Olcott tie up. Using a pretty shaky spiritual theory to exert a hold isn't necessary and can lead to spiritual disease if the theoretical precedents aren't present. You see it here: obsession, anguish, sorrow because one person is unwilling to subject themselves to the control of another.
In your particular case you seem to have arrived a sound conclusion.

Thank you, Lorelyen, that's very kind of you:)

To arrive anywhere here, or go anywhere, it helps to operate from a theosophical place. What one might have suffer to get to that place might signify the one-in-one-hundred.

[leader_of_ten]

Originally posted by Lorelyen

If you'll excuse my saying so, I love your writing style!

My comment about 'it's as simple as that' just referred to the phenomenon. Call a twin flame a phenomenon, relationship, whatever you choose but if it's a false, a logical 'not' then it's still a not. Attaching a label is fine as long as semiotically it has meaning. So I reckoned a false twin is a not-twin and somehow that origin of false twin came into being for reasons I suspect rather than substantiate. I believe that in 99% of cases it's a con even if not deliberate. It's a way of trying to pin someone down to a long lasting relationship by quasi-spiritual means so ownership of someone's emotions, their compliance, in aeternum, as an entitlement. No cynicism on my part. Millions of life-long relationships exist without the participants ever being aware of the Blavatsky/Olcott tie up. Using a pretty shaky spiritual theory to exert a hold isn't necessary and can lead to spiritual disease if the theoretical precedents aren't present. You see it here: obsession, anguish, sorrow because one person is unwilling to subject themselves to the control of another.
In your particular case you seem to have arrived a sound conclusion.

Thank you, Lorelyen, that's very kind of you:)

To arrive anywhere here, or go anywhere, it helps to operate from a theosophical place. What one might have suffer to get to that place might signify the one-in-one-hundred.

[Captain_Oblivious]

Thanks to everyone for answering my long message. It means a lot.

Originally Posted by Lorelyen

My views are rarely welcome here as I'm practical and try to be realistic about things in my life. Point is, most of the stuff out on the web, the youtubes and splurges of words, are claptrap. This twin flame thing is probably the most unhealthy spiritual concept I've encountered. I didn't arrive at that conclusion lightly; I spent (now I realise) too long trying to find out what it really is - and I failed because there are hundreds of theories: some about deeply rooted bonds with a certain inevitability, to fairly superficial encounters between those with certain needs. It seems its value is more just a label

Thanks Lorelyen. Some very good points, and most certainly not unwelcome from me. It's funny, after writing this post I've become less inclined to use the twin flame term because it's a label that places too much pressure on our connection, as well as perhaps being a tad self-important. It's also dangerous to identify synchronicities all the time, to the point where I'm almost looking for them. I've received enough confirmation already. Now it's time to focus on being the best possible version of myself.

In the last few days I've focused on letting go of negative emotions, while being as giving as I can to everyone in my life. It's already made a huge difference, and likely one of the main reasons she became drawn to me in the first place.

Whether her and I are simply work colleagues, friends, lovers, whatever label we want to use, it doesn't matter. The quality of our interactions is all that matters, and the universe takes care of the rest.

Originally Posted by Lorelyen

I reckon your best bet is to stay as friendly with her as you can. Her initial avoidance of you could be because in the time you were very friendly she divulged things that now embarrass her. It could even be because she's been derided by other people in the workplace. Could be because She's going through a phase of hating romance, maybe even men to whom she's attracted. I mean, you can't blame her really, can you? Could also be because she ALSO encountered this twin flame idea but in a different form - and in the wake of her break-up she really doesn't want the sort of intense commitment twin flames demand.

They're brilliant points. I never really thought about it this way. The idea of her perhaps just wanting to avoid close relationships with any man - besides her father - has crossed my mind, but she could well feel embarrassed, or at the very least she perhaps just wants our relationship to return to the way it was before her breakup. Back then we were carefree with no attachments, given that she was married and we didn't feel any pressure to be anything other than ourselves. We also teased each other playfully (sometimes relentlessly), which I've diverted from in recent months.

I was also emitting a vibe of neediness, wanting to be close to her and even moving towards a romantic relationship. No doubt she felt this. Whenever I asked how she's traveling in email or message, she wasn't answering that part of my message. My gut feeling is that she just wants things back to normal, and focus on her new life. The past is the past, and there's nothing she can do about it now.

Whether or not we become a couple in the romantic sense doesn't matter. Maybe we're destined to be lifelong friends, and I need to accept this.