Empath Manipulation

[TonySG]

Originally Posted by engellstein

An empath manipulator.. I've never heard of that. I've heard of empaths being manipulated. This sounds akin to charisma. If you have an outgoing, charismatic personality, manipulation is the order of the day.

I thought being an empath meant you took in the emotions of others and let them affect you. What you're describing is more of a psychic influence where you get inside a person and influence their thinking towards your thoughts.

The short advice is, you gotta stop doing that lol. Live and let live. Let life flow more. Don't take the bull by the horns in every social interaction you face. Just allow.

If you were raised in a controlling environment that may be hard to, but all it is is a limiting belief active in your mind. Figure out how to transform limiting beliefs.

You hit the nail on the head here. I am hyper sensitive however at the same time I use some psychic influence on others. Having been raised in a controlling environment it is something I have struggled to shake off. I am practicing on having healthy strong boundaries. Hopefully it helps.

[kapamati1]

Originally Posted by engellstein

Those are excellent articles. They pretty much sum up all my key relationships over most my life.

If I ever told people that I could sense emotions or thoughts I would immediately get hit with criticism. And the critics were always manipulative people with something to hide. I always knew they were just trying to get me to doubt myself so they could continue pulling the wool over my head.

And that article on narcissists was spot on too. They will play games with your head til the cows come home. It never ends. One moment they are your friend, they got your back. The next moment they're tearing you down and running you under the bus. It all comes from their need to control. If they create enough chaos then you never know what's coming and they can maintain control because the chaos is being introduced in a very controlled manner from their point of view.

I solved that issue by moving away from those "friends". Plus doing some internal work so I don't attract new people like that.

I had to move away from a group of people that I was involved with for several years. They even have a "king narcissists". Looking back, I have no idea how I didn't realize it. The hardest part was letting go of a friend in this group that I had grown close to. Only because she had told me her life story and then told only me her dirty laundry. I kept her secret and always will. But, after the last two years of it....it was sickening. She was cheating on a man who loved her very much. And if she wasn't cheating she was leading on and flirting with any man that would notice her. It was sad. I tried to be there for her. But, then, I got tired of her wanting pity and support for a seedy drama that she was creating. Toward the end, she became very condescending and cruel with her words to me when I began to distance myself because I couldn't be her dumping ground anymore. At the end, I realized, she was never there for me. When I needed her...she always had an excuse why she didn't have time to listen. But, bully ME if I truly had something going on in my life that required my full attention and briefly little for her. Longer story. But, I will stop there. She was one of the best specimens of a female narcissists I'd ever witnessed. I bought it hook line and sinker. I truly did learn a lot from the failed friendship and the "group" I was in which the friendship originated from. I will no longer be a magnet for these self serving pretenders.

Yes, great articles. I had a feeling they would be appreciated here. And most certainly understood.

[Sarella]

Hi tonySG , wow I could have written your post. I feel other people's emotions. I can read it from them because I am sensitive to it. I have a controlling mother and I have noticed a trend of being controlling as well. Seven years ago I broke the apron strings so to speak and once aware you can control the "being controlling ". It doesn't really bother me that she was so controlling until it did lol.

[starcatcher.1122]

This is great advice. I am an empath as well Tony and I also had a lot of issues with being manipulative and controlling at times. Being an emapth then being able to use psychic influence, lol, yea..I did that for a while. I learned to stop in the middle of me doing so and would just tell the person..

Originally Posted by TonySG

You hit the nail on the head here. I am hyper sensitive however at the same time I use some psychic influence on others. Having been raised in a controlling environment it is something I have struggled to shake off. I am practicing on having healthy strong boundaries. Hopefully it helps.

[engellstein]

Just out of curiosity, for those that say they find themselves trying to control others, where do you notice you focus goes?

So when you're just sitting quietly, where is your attention/focus/awareness? Is it inside your head? Is it outside of you?

Compare this to when you're around other people. Where does your focus go? Does it change?
And especially when you're around someone you know you are trying to control. Where is your focus at?

This may be an easy or hard exercise. It takes an observant eye to notice the subtle presence of your focus, but it can be done. I'm curious what people are noticing.