Popped into my head...

[Michelle11]

I am going to say something here and this is just my opinion so take it for what it is worth but I am not certain he is thinking about your or contacting you from afar. From what you describe it sounds like you have profound regret and remorse about the relationship. This sort of pain can creep up when we are in a settled state a lot of times doing something mundane. The thing is no matter what you did to him you are not responsible for how he feels towards you. He is. He is the one whose job it is to come to terms with the relationship. You can't do that for him. Your role in his life was to give him the opportunity to learn forgiveness. You as well have an opportunity to learn self forgiveness. Focus on that and not on how he feels because when you take it with you like I have it can be hard to understand why you feel so guilty in life. Self blame will do a number on your well being so take some time to reconcile the fact you were under a lot of stress from the miscarriage and your previous life troubles. Everything that happens to us and how we handle it is a learning experience. Even things that appear to be failures still have lessons learned. You are human and will make mistakes, sometimes some that seem pretty big but you are not judged for them for this is the playground we have devised for such things. So please do try to spend some time releasing the guilt, self blame and the man from your energy. Carrying him with you will only cause you pain and hold you back. I think it is great you are sending out sincere apologies to him but also spend some very much needed time on learning to forgive yourself for being human so you can move forward. Your Ex will be fine and will sort it out one day if he hasn't already. Take care.

Ok, so since i have been channeling (which i think i can call it that) the way i perceive higher consciousness thought has changed. At first my experience started off communicating with 1 person, then more and more. These days, I don't hear the same spirits usually... I hear the people around me, specifically the ones thinking about me, or judging what I'm thinking about. I try to confront these thoughts, but to no avail. Not many people will be aware of their thoughts surprisingly. It's almost as if they have a consciousness they are not aware of and is wondering around without them! I hope this can be helpful to you, as I am no professional in this subject.

Dear all

Its been a while but I'd like to give you all an update.

After many, many weeks of wondering, last night (or rather the early hours of this morning), I plucked up the courage to email the man to whom I think i have been either channeling thoughts and feelings to over issues I have detailed in this thread.

I had an email back this morning from him telling me he bares me no grudge and doesn't think badly of me. It wasn't a long email but one that I am deeply grateful to have received. I am hoping that tentatively a communication line of friendship can now be opened up between us. I sincerely believe that somehow he has gotten the thoughts and feelings I have had and maybe somehow channeled towards him.

Anyway, just thought I'd give an update. I'm no expert in spiritual matters but maybe something did happen that is out of my control and reach and beyond my understanding but has with the greatest of appreciation from me can now give some peace to a situation that should never have taken place.

Peace to all of you.

LW x