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Go Back   Spiritual Forums > Spirituality & Beliefs > Spirituality

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  #1  
Old 21-07-2011, 12:50 PM
3dnow
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Is there such a thing as "fault"

Hi forum,

Working on self-forgiveness... Accepted that nothing is/was my fault. Reasons of faults are uncontrollable inputs from life...

Now whenever I realize that I am judging a thought I stop and say it is not my "fault", I don't even know why I have this thought. It works! I forget the issue immediately and move on. Doesn't mean I am not sorry for what happened, but not my "fault".

However, now I am wondering if there is such thing as "fault". I would say that with the above reasoning there is not.

What do you think?

3dnow
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  #2  
Old 21-07-2011, 12:59 PM
BlueSky BlueSky is offline
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I have hurt people in my life and I have been at fault. Sorry I can't apply your line of reasoning to my reality.
James
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  #3  
Old 21-07-2011, 01:10 PM
3dnow
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Quote:
Originally Posted by WhiteShaman
I have hurt people in my life and I have been at fault. Sorry I can't apply your line of reasoning to my reality.
James

OK but I want you forgive yourself what about me? (I have no idea why)

I have also hurt my ex girl friend for example. I took alcohol and insulted her. She cried and ran away.

Now looks like accusing myself is a good idea. But it is not. My ex doesn't even remember the issue its was 15 years ago. How to forgive myself? What is the excuse? There is only one and very good excuse. I HAVE NO IDEA WHY THIS HAPPENED. (not because of alcohol it was just one beer).
It was a random accident caused by previous events in my life, how they were interpreted in my brain, etc. When you look this way it is impossible to judge me neither. In addition, when you accept this you can easily apply to others and stop judging them. Impossible to judge.

3dnow
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  #4  
Old 21-07-2011, 01:18 PM
Shabda Shabda is offline
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i also dont agree with the line of reasoning...the way i see it, random, or at least seemingly random events occur in life, but then the individual choose how to react to, or act upon, whichever set of circumstances, and the choice we make may seem random, but are still courses of action chosen by ourselves, so who else can possibly be at fault for those choices? they cant be simply random because we chose those actions....for myself, there has never been an occurrence in life where i couldnt have chosen a different, and perhaps better, or more beneficial course of action.
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  #5  
Old 21-07-2011, 01:18 PM
Internal Queries Internal Queries is offline
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the only thing guilt is good for is to create an aversion to repeating mistakes. one can accept that one made a mistake ie was at fault and then move on from there. just don't do it again. guilt lesson completed. problem solved.
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  #6  
Old 21-07-2011, 01:21 PM
Natalia
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Um...well..

I have learnt and am learning to take responsibility for my actions and not pass the buck on to something. I've done and said rotten stuff too but it wasn't the only option i could have gone with. Loosing self control is never an attractive thing. To control the self and not get explosive is easier for some though but it's not to say it can't be achieved. If i have been angry it's generally because i have bottled up a hurt which then turned to a resentment then frustration and finally anger and instead of getting it out on the table and sorting it out i allowed it to erupt and yeah alcohol can easily bring that out. Now i'm not speaking for everyone here. This is my personal past experiences.
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  #7  
Old 21-07-2011, 01:24 PM
BlueSky BlueSky is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 3dnow
OK but I want you forgive yourself what about me? (I have no idea why)

I have also hurt my ex girl friend for example. I took alcohol and insulted her. She cried and ran away.

Now looks like accusing myself is a good idea. But it is not. My ex doesn't even remember the issue its was 15 years ago. How to forgive myself? What is the excuse? There is only one and very good excuse. I HAVE NO IDEA WHY THIS HAPPENED. (not because of alcohol it was just one beer).
It was a random accident caused by previous events in my life, how they were interpreted in my brain, etc. When you look this way it is impossible to judge me neither. In addition, when you accept this you can easily apply to others and stop judging them. Impossible to judge.

3dnow

We can judge ourselves with compassion and understanding and sympathy but in the end I am responsible for my actions.
I hear what you are saying though and it is obvious in extreme cases such as a young girl being sexually abused her whole life. She may not be strong enough as a result to not act the same way as she gets older but that is the extreme. In essence she never had a chance and maybe those who abused her never did either. I can only speak for myself on this..............I know better so therefore I am responsible.
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  #8  
Old 21-07-2011, 01:28 PM
BlueSky BlueSky is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Internal Queries
the only thing guilt is good for is to create an aversion to repeating mistakes. one can accept that one made a mistake ie was at fault and then move on from there. just don't do it again. guilt lesson completed. problem solved.

Years ago I mentally put all my guilt into a suitcase and dropped it off in an alley. I visualized this.
That and attempts to make things right seemed to work quite well. As well as can be expected anyways.
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  #9  
Old 21-07-2011, 01:41 PM
Mathew James Mathew James is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 3dnow
...I took alcohol and insulted her. She cried and ran away.

....it was just one beer).

It was a random accident caused by previous events in my life, how they were interpreted in my brain, etc. When you look this way it is impossible to judge me neither. In addition, when you accept this you can easily apply to others and stop judging them. Impossible to judge.


It was surely not the alcohol, you would need about 10 more drinks in you to have a real good drunk being an idiot event. So forget about it being alcohol related. Sounds like there was a series of events in your life that gives you a reason to feel guilty about. Where you judged by people about something and you know you were guilty?


mj
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  #10  
Old 21-07-2011, 02:00 PM
moke64916
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 3dnow
Hi forum,

Working on self-forgiveness... Accepted that nothing is/was my fault. Reasons of faults are uncontrollable inputs from life...

Now whenever I realize that I am judging a thought I stop and say it is not my "fault", I don't even know why I have this thought. It works! I forget the issue immediately and move on. Doesn't mean I am not sorry for what happened, but not my "fault".

However, now I am wondering if there is such thing as "fault". I would say that with the above reasoning there is not.

What do you think?
3dnow

I think it depends on what type of 'fault' you are talking about. If it involves two parties I think both parties are responsible regardless of fault. It's the mature thing to do, to take responsibility for ones actions. I don't know what type of fault you are talking about. If it has to do with yourself and your thoughts, then "Forgive, and let give." The let give part may take a little bit to grasp. If you are wondering the psychology of what frame of mind you have been in lately the conscious, subconscious, and superconscious mind.

Here is a thread on it:

http://www.spiritualforums.com/vb/sh...ad.php?t=18979
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