What Makes Us Feel How We Do?

[Saggi]

What are these emotions we feel for the opposite sex and why do we feel them?

Why are we attracted sexually to some yet not others?

Why do we fight some that in truth are good for us, yet can follow those that are no good for us to the end of the earth and back again if we get the urge to?

Why do we have a line that's so fine it's hardly there for some, yet wouldn't even consider letting others cross the line?

I'm in a state of confusion!

Love and hugs

Jo

XxXx

[Perspective]

Originally Posted by Saggi

What are these emotions we feel for the opposite sex and why do we feel them?

Hi Jo,
Emotions result from thoughts. Our body, including our brain is uniquely feminine or masculine & naturally craves the opposite, for unity... not just sex, but also in many other ways.

Why are we attracted sexually to some yet not others?

It depends a lot on thoughts & what we've told ourselves is "sexy" & I've also heard that each person has their own unique aroma, from their body's chemistry & when we smell someone - we either share similar "chemistry" or not.

Why do we fight some that in truth are good for us, yet can follow those that are no good for us to the end of the earth and back again if we get the urge to?

Several possible reasons...
1. Competition - if there are others interested, one may want to "prove themselves" by winning their love/interest above the others.
2. Recreating past drama. Subconsciously, we often choose partners who remind us of maybe a parent, which gives us another opportunity to heal old wounds, with more maturity this time.
3. Maybe part of the "naughty" (or shadow self) in us... wants what appears to be adventurous passion... which at first, feels euphoric & exciting, but then usually ends up crashing down with the same energy.

I hope you're alright, Jo.

[Saggi]

Originally Posted by Perspective

Hi Jo,
Emotions result from thoughts. Our body, including our brain is uniquely feminine or masculine & naturally craves the opposite, for unity... not just sex, but also in many other ways. It depends a lot on thoughts & what we've told ourselves is "sexy" & I've also heard that each person has their own unique aroma, from their body's chemistry & when we smell someone - we either share similar "chemistry" or not. Several possible reasons...
1. Competition - if there are others interested, one may want to "prove themselves" by winning their love/interest above the others.
2. Recreating past drama. Subconsciously, we often choose partners who remind us of maybe a parent, which gives us another opportunity to heal old wounds, with more maturity this time.
3. Maybe part of the "naughty" (or shadow self) in us... wants what appears to be adventurous passion... which at first, feels euphoric & exciting, but then usually ends up crashing down with the same energy.

I hope you're alright, Jo.

I'm ok hunny, thank you! Just a little mixed up! I threw my questions out into the void and it seems I was given the opportunity to see my situation in another 'Perspective' ;)

I need to retrace, there's obviously something still not been dealt with.

The only thing that confuses me with that is, where I am within the situation there seems to be two complete opposite ends of the spectrum. The feelings I have seem to stem from other's thoughts as well as my own and them being in line or even not in line with mine, in the case of the latter there's a void!

Is this why people have affairs?

What they feel they need from one person isn't being fulfilled, so they find it in another?

What happens when you discover that no-one can fulfill it other than you? How does that help?

I miss being single! When I only had myself to consider, it was easier!

Love and hugs

Jo

XxXx

[Perspective]

Originally Posted by Saggi

The only thing that confuses me with that is, where I am within the situation there seems to be two complete opposite ends of the spectrum. The feelings I have seem to stem from other's thoughts as well as my own and them being in line or even not in line with mine, in the case of the latter there's a void!

Is this why people have affairs?

What they feel they need from one person isn't being fulfilled, so they find it in another?

What happens when you discover that no-one can fulfill it other than you? How does that help?

I miss being single! When I only had myself to consider, it was easier!

I'm glad you're ok, Jo.
Let me see if I understand you....
You feel like your not in harmony with your partner?
Like there's some "voids" of disconnect in the relationships?
It that's the case, I can relate!
And I have been tempted to have an affair, but distance among other things like, I have really dedicated little chaparones! lol
Seriously, I think no 1 person can possibly meet all of our needs, nor are they meant to. We're meant to have many people in our lives...
I'm not saying to have many romantic partners... although it's easy to tie intimacy (emotional even) with romance.

I've also discovered that the base of my happiness & needs can only be fulfilled by me.
It helps to know this because then you don't go "looking for love in all the wrong places."

I can relate with missing those single care-free times! (sigh)
To not have to worry or ask anyone - just do what you want when you want!
To have fun, falling in & out of love...uh - that wasn't always so fun, was it?
I also remember wondering when I was going to meet Prince charming. lol
Sometimes I felt lonely, coming home after work to be alone.

Maybe what's needed is some time away. You know how you get a part of a song stuck in your head?
Well, I unknowingly changed the words, & keep playing them over in my mind...
"Everybody needs a little time a way... I had to say... from each other.
Everybody needs a holiday, far away from the one that they love."

Maybe a bunch of us girls should get together & go on a cruise or something!

[Roselove]

phermones and biology we are programmed to lbe attracted to people that look like us (feature wise) or like the opposite sex parent.


as for fighting truth/reality that would be our emotions coloring situations.

[Silver]

Originally Posted by Saggi

...I need to retrace, there's obviously something still not been dealt with.
The only thing that confuses me with that is, where I am within the situation there seems to be two complete opposite ends of the spectrum. The feelings I have seem to stem from other's thoughts as well as my own and them being in line or even not in line with mine, in the case of the latter there's a void!
Is this why people have affairs?
What they feel they need from one person isn't being fulfilled, so they find it in another?
What happens when you discover that no-one can fulfill it other than you? How does that help?
I miss being single! When I only had myself to consider, it was easier!
Jo

XxXx

I think it's to do with being on the same wavelength ~ at the same time.
As is said, timing is everything?
There seems to be a hunger that people have, and as with every individual, the timing of it and strength varies all the time, and who has time for figuring out the whys and hows of it? I think this wavelength and timing seems to explain it on a very simple level, and it sure plays havoc with our social expectations of being true to our promised ones. It's a painful situation for sure.
I think there's a whole lot to this subject.

{Hope I'm reading you right}

[Miss Hepburn]

Originally Posted by Saggi

What are these emotions we feel for the opposite sex and why do we feel them?
Why are we attracted sexually to some, yet not others?
Why do we fight some that in truth are good for us, yet can follow those that are no good for us to the end of the earth and back again if we get the urge to?
Why do we have a line that's so fine it's hardly there for some, yet wouldn't even consider letting others cross the line?
I'm in a state of confusion!
Love and hugs
Jo
XxXx

I am so sorry. I've read a couple of your posts - you're in deep ___ aren't you?
Been there!!!!


I found that reading 'Getting the Love You Want' explains alot. Harvelle Hendricks
Just 2 chapters and you'll get it.

[Saggi]

Originally Posted by Perspective

I'm glad you're ok, Jo.
Let me see if I understand you....
You feel like your not in harmony with your partner?
Like there's some "voids" of disconnect in the relationships?
It that's the case, I can relate!
And I have been tempted to have an affair, but distance among other things like, I have really dedicated little chaparones! lol
Seriously, I think no 1 person can possibly meet all of our needs, nor are they meant to. We're meant to have many people in our lives...
I'm not saying to have many romantic partners... although it's easy to tie intimacy (emotional even) with romance.

I've also discovered that the base of my happiness & needs can only be fulfilled by me.
It helps to know this because then you don't go "looking for love in all the wrong places."

I can relate with missing those single care-free times! (sigh)
To not have to worry or ask anyone - just do what you want when you want!
To have fun, falling in & out of love...uh - that wasn't always so fun, was it?
I also remember wondering when I was going to meet Prince charming. lol
Sometimes I felt lonely, coming home after work to be alone.

Maybe what's needed is some time away. You know how you get a part of a song stuck in your head?
Well, I unknowingly changed the words, & keep playing them over in my mind...
"Everybody needs a little time a way... I had to say... from each other.
Everybody needs a holiday, far away from the one that they love."

Maybe a bunch of us girls should get together & go on a cruise or something!

Thank you!

You seem to have a good understanding of where I am,,, And the confusion behind it!! LOL!

Since posting, I've spent some time by myself and also with my partner.

It seems it's more what I can and it seems what I must do for him, rather than what I feel he can do or must do for me!

Personally, I don't need nor want anything, I am a self-sufficient, independant woman, who also knows her own body,,,

I enjoy our relationship, I like being a part of it with him and I'm concentrating on that rather than it ending,,,, this is what he's doing though.

We've passed the argue and it's over point.

There is still a way to go before he feels more secure and confident within the relationship, I'm happy to see it out or not if this is the case.

It took me a long time to let go and see things go with the flow, now I'm here, I wonder whather this is the reason why there's less emotional turmoil within the relationship and when it turns up it's hard to turn away from it.

The cruise sounds good to me,,,, the situation being what it is, not sure it would go down so well with my partner,,,

Love and hugs

Jo

XxXx

[Saggi]

Originally Posted by Rosewater

phermones and biology we are programmed to lbe attracted to people that look like us (feature wise) or like the opposite sex parent.


as for fighting truth/reality that would be our emotions coloring situations.

My partner looks nothing like me or my Dad

I know I quite able to put my rose tints on and see things as they're not!

But are my feelings wrong?

Love and hugs

Jo

XxXx

[Saggi]

Originally Posted by Silvergirl

I think it's to do with being on the same wavelength ~ at the same time.
As is said, timing is everything?
There seems to be a hunger that people have, and as with every individual, the timing of it and strength varies all the time, and who has time for figuring out the whys and hows of it? I think this wavelength and timing seems to explain it on a very simple level, and it sure plays havoc with our social expectations of being true to our promised ones. It's a painful situation for sure.
I think there's a whole lot to this subject.

{Hope I'm reading you right}

Yes, wavelength!! Thank you!

In lots of ways my partner and I are on the same one, in others we're not and in some ways I wonder whether we ever will be.

As I stated up there, I can wait and see whether it is just timing, whether it will sort out because I enjoy the rest of it.

C'est La Vie, if we had it all would we be happy?

Love and hugs

Jo

XxXx