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Go Back   Spiritual Forums > Spirituality & Beliefs > Healing

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  #11  
Old 14-02-2007, 01:56 AM
ljepotica
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Ancestral and Woman Who Loves Nature-I admire you so much, you both are brilliant examples of people who are amazing-to have gone through what you did and then sorting out all those things that happaned certainly make you both not only survivors but the types of people I look up to and have ultimate respect for

What a wonderful idea Space Man

Cweiters-I can understand where you're coming from-I mean I didn't suffer from spiritual abuse but from other types of "abuses" that were not sexual, physical or mental in nature.

We are all surviviors and we are most certainly not alone and I want to thank you wonderful people for sharing your stories here!

Lots of love and angels blessings to you all

S xxxx
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  #12  
Old 22-02-2007, 02:39 AM
Woman Who Loves Nature
Posts: n/a
 
People who have been abused

Thank You Ijepotica for the wonderful complement. I so admire the people here who have come forward and spoke of their personal experiences of abuse and I know that it is a very hard thing to do. To me talking about these things is the First and Most Important step to Healing and Help. I have found in all the aspects of the Spiritual Forums site that I have seen Much Understanding, Support and Genuine Compassion. I am so GLAD that I found this site and joined it, I feel at home in a Great Big Loving family! Thank You All!!!
Love, Light, Joy and Healing To One and All. WWLN



The First Step to any Success is in Ones Intent and Perseverance and then
what follows Is Movement.
WWLN

Last edited by Woman Who Loves Nature : 14-03-2007 at 06:58 AM.
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  #13  
Old 22-02-2007, 07:05 AM
anonymomr
Posts: n/a
 
My coping strategy

I have spent many years remembering and writing about the incidents, the people involved, the decisions I made when facing that situation and what I would like to do about it now.

Mainly, the healing has been in Forgetting, Forgiving and moving on...

An automatic Kundalini arousal hastened this process a lot...more like a roller coaster ride.
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  #14  
Old 25-02-2007, 03:12 PM
hnasc
Posts: n/a
 
No victims

I had to learn to be intimate again. I went from total suppression to total abandon after my childhood abuse and then, through healing the inner child within me, I got to the point where I began to be clear about what I wanted as a woman, from an intimate relationship.

It was challenging to voice that, and insist on my needs being met, but it was a vital part of my healing. I'm very glad that Ancestral was with a man who did not take her flashbacks personally. That, in itself, must have helped the healing process.

Another thing that I've realized, and that may be very hard for others to accept, is that there are no victims.

I was hurt, terribly, but I've come to know in my adult life that my abuser suffered as much as I did.

Because I understand that I am more than this body, more than the experience of this particular lifetime, I am able to see this experience as one that was co-created at some point. Certainly, I did not create it conscioulsy in this lifetime, but the seeds were laid down at some point for myself and this person to connect.

In my particular case, the abuser was given the opportunity to change a legacy of abuse. He was not strong enough to do that and I suffered greatly as a result but I am empowered by knowing the nobility of my path and the opportunity I provided him.
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  #15  
Old 25-02-2007, 03:37 PM
janspirit
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Hi

I was abused sexually, mentally, phyically and emotionaly from age 5 - 16 by my mum's live in boyf. My sis was too (she is 3 yrs younger) and my bro. He passed at 18... We have all made suicide attempts.. but survived that.

Have had counselling and been in survivor group (1999)... didnt remember all of it til i was 40... and then flashbacks came and my body told me in no uncertain terms the truth and horror of it all. Have just come out of an abusive relationship (see myspace) and am going thru a v difficult time at the mo. My spiritual path has always been my life raft and I'm holding on tight..

am hoping soon to be a thriver not just a survivor

lots of love and hugs to u all

janspirit x


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  #16  
Old 25-02-2007, 07:47 PM
OceanWaves19161
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You guys are all so unbelievably strong. Its amazing the strength people have. You should all be really proud of yourselves:)
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  #17  
Old 27-02-2007, 04:10 PM
lemmex
Posts: n/a
 
some things you and do

Quote:
Originally Posted by OceanWaves19161
I was wondering if anyone could advise me on how to help her and support her as best I can?


There is no clear cut advise anyone can give about this, but to show unconditional love and when necessary be strong for her. You might even call it interfer. People are dealing with the memory is like living it over again and there's this (invalid) shame. It's something that (usually) takes years and years just to deal with without help. People tend to withdrawl and be self destructive just to deal with it because they blame themselves when they (even) aren't at fault (but they feel they are). Quilt is a terrible motivator. I tell you this because I want you to be prepared. Your freind will have to go trough many levels of forgiveness (and pain). First she must learn to forgive herself (believe it or not), then her abuser. She will have to give herself permission and the first is to free herself and to be honest. She's probably that little girl in an adults body carrying the weight few can imagine. Then it will probably turn to anger, then hate and have to go full circle since she will not (hopefully) abuse herself. The abuse is lashing out turned inward, in others it is projected outward. It is how she is trying to deal with it. This is not an easy road and I know you mean well, but profession help is the safest way, but you can't, I repeat, can't, be judgemental, force her, or patranize her. She's made the first step by confiding in you. It how people test other people. We do this by signals. Talk to her and suggest what's in your heart. Educate yourself and be supportive and if necessary support her. Drive her to her appointment the first time. The difficulty is (from what I sense from what you wrote) and is typically ture she does not love herself, who she is right now (she does not want to be this future person). It's about hope! (which can be both positive or negative) She feels she does not have the right to. She is going to have to learn to trust again. But in the end it is up to her. I hope all goes well.

Last edited by lemmex : 27-02-2007 at 04:34 PM.
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  #18  
Old 14-03-2007, 08:25 AM
Woman Who Loves Nature
Posts: n/a
 
Janspirit, I am so proud of you and I think you have gone past what I would call that first step. You will realize that you deserve the best in life and will come to know that you will not settle for less because you do not have to ever! It will come and you will know it by the warmth and confidence you will feel in your own heart and then look out world here is the new, strong and deserving the best Janspirit! Trust in yourself, Love yourself, Forgive Yourself! For as it took me so long to realize and believe... "It Was Not My Fault, I Was the Innocent, I Was the Child and I Was taken advantage of and I No Longer Feel or Hold the self-guilt. The guilt I held was never mine to carry or accept. I Am Now and Forever Will Be Released from This Burden" It was at the age of 44 when I reached this realization and how I wished it had been much sooner. I am grateful that I found my strength and freedom from the nightmare I lived in all that time. As you will too I am sure! I send Prayers of Healing to you Janspirit and to all whom have experienced these horrendous acts against us as children and as young adults, which in turn has affected most of us into our adult lives. I send Prayers of Healing daily. I, through Professional help over several years, finally found that part of me that was lost, hated, ashamed, and believed guilty only to find I was none of those things ever! I was the Victim, I was the Innocent, and did not deserve the abuse and I will No Longer Hold Any Guilt that was never mine. I will no longer be ashamed for I did nothing to be ashamed of. I have found my inner Strength and my Spirituality and I Trust in myself and I Love Who I Am now. And...what was the most difficult for me...but was a miracle experience, when I felt the forgiveness not only for myself but also my attackers. Something I didn't believe could ever happen. That was 10 years ago and that once said and felt, released me to be the person who I am today. I strive to live a loving, caring, compassionate life and always trusting in myself to know I am deserving of the good in life. I am Bonnie Masson and I am Woman Who Loves Nature.
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  #19  
Old 14-03-2007, 01:28 PM
Philip
Posts: n/a
 
Reunite us in oneness with you in response to our allowing those who have lent us aid in our reunificaton process to come to their own reunification. Jesus said this as "Forgive us our trespasses AS we forgive those who trepass against us.". While it is all about me it can never be about one. It is in seeing the ordinariness of the one/s who have "abused" us that we leave the place of seperation and rejoin the wholeness that is Love/Life.

The peace of oneness will refresh you in Body, Mind, and Spirit.
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  #20  
Old 14-03-2007, 02:44 PM
nibbles
Posts: n/a
 
Hi from Dublin

hello all,

I am here to share. I am 34 years old, I have three beautiful boys and I am in the slow agonising process of either saving or letting do my marraige. I have always felt different. I was told often not to be so soft, that I was way to sensitive to tkae a joke. Anyways I have been through so much especially in the last 8 years. That I have now turned inward stasrted to ask very valid questions. As to why I react sometimes.

I think I may have been sexually abused as a child I say think as the memories only surface every now and then especially when I am feeling hurt or humiliated little snachets...like a cine film being played beneath eye lids.....but there not very tangible.

I know I have to seek professional advice but I ahve had a bad expierence with counselling....maybe I wasn't ready...

Anyways love and light to you all you are all brave brave individuals
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