Out of my mind

[Aloneyetnot]

Originally Posted by DaisySunshine

It's been 18 days now of my tf ignoring me. Nothing specific happened, we were just texting as friends. Then radio silence despite him being active on social media. For 2 weeks he didn't even read my messages, then this past weekend he finally did but no response. 10 months as close friends and now this.

I know I'm supposed to just let go and focus on myself but I can't. This is driving me out of my mind. Even if he told me he doesn't want to talk anymore, I'd have something concrete. But I am a wreck and am just crazy over this. How do I do this? What do I do? What do I not do?

Every time I start to attempt to let go for my own peace and sanity, I think how unfair it is. He doesn't get to just hurt me like this and pretend I don't exist while he goes on to have a picture perfwct fairytale life. No, he doesn't get to.

Not sure if this helps or not, but I've read your past posts and I don't believe that he really feels nothing romantically. I think it's there, it may be subconscious, but there. Perhaps what he is currently feeling for the other person is lust? Hard to say. He "just" needs to wake up. (And I'm not implying that it's easy - but once he does, things will turn around quite quickly.)

[A human Being]

I feel for you, Daisy, I really do - I know of the heartache, sadness, resentment, anger, doubt, confusion, and so on, and it just is not an easy thing to go through. I'm thinking that maybe you need to communicate your feelings to him, preferably from a place of non-resistance - tell him of the hurt his actions (or inaction) have triggered in you, tell him of the upset you're feeling. Maybe try writing it all out beforehand, really vent all your pent-up anger and frustration and unearth those hurt feelings (try not to get bogged down in some story about how unfair it all is, even though I know how easy it can be to do so). He might not respond favourably, if at all, but at least you'll have got it out of your system.

Originally Posted by ONEsoul

Daily Sunshine You may not believe me, but I have been where you are at EXACTLY this point.... It is HELL on earth, but here is what I know....You have been hand selected to experience this hell....Consider yourself blessed....A great friend /pastor once told me....Darkness does not come after the weak and mild....why would it? That is no threat to God's kingdom...Darkness comes after those whom are filled with LIGHT, and are able and willing to do good in this world...It will come at you in every imaginable way....So as he told me I am telling you.."Consider yourself blessed" , that darkness finds you a threat....BUT I WILL ALSO TELL YOU...If you turn on a light in a dark room, darkness disappears.. LIGHT TRUMPS DARKNESS, EASILY...Keep your light present..and you can EASILY say "shoo fly" go away. It is no longer a threat... Find your light love, and dont let go xoxoxo

This is very inspiring, thanks for that :)

(It does rather get me to thinking that God's mistaken me for Conan the freaking Barbarian, mind )

[DaisySunshine]

I appreciate all of your words, really I do. But I just can't comprehend and accept. He has issues with bipolar, anxiety, and anger. He is one that avoids conflict and hises his feelings. He's been dating someone for a few months, so obviously he had to throw me away so he could have a perfect fairytale life with her. No more negativity, just the dream wedding he talked about with me but with her instead. He'll probably name their kids the names he picked with me. And occasionally think of me and breathe a sigh of relief he dodged a bullet. Thinking of how had we had a child together it would have been the ugliest thing inside and out to be on this planet. Grateful that getting rid of me made his lifetime of issues go away and make way for a heavenly life with her. That. That is what I can't accept.

[A human Being]

Originally Posted by DaisySunshine

I appreciate all of your words, really I do. But I just can't comprehend and accept. He has issues with bipolar, anxiety, and anger. He is one that avoids conflict and hises his feelings. He's been dating someone for a few months, so obviously he had to throw me away so he could have a perfect fairytale life with her. No more negativity, just the dream wedding he talked about with me but with her instead. He'll probably name their kids the names he picked with me. And occasionally think of me and breathe a sigh of relief he dodged a bullet. Thinking of how had we had a child together it would have been the ugliest thing inside and out to be on this planet. Grateful that getting rid of me made his lifetime of issues go away and make way for a heavenly life with her. That. That is what I can't accept.

Looking at it objectively, it's starting to sound like you've dodged a bullet with this chap tbh, he sounds far from stable. As far as being able to comprehend and accept the situation goes, bear in mind that acceptance doesn't happen on a purely mental level - it certainly can help to stand back from the situation and consider it from all angles so that you can better understand why he's behaved as he has done and what his actions have triggered in you, but you've also got to give your attention to what you're feeling without the distraction of all the mental stories, as hard as I know that can be. You might benefit a lot from meditation and journalling, if you don't do those things already

[Roxane9]

I like the reply above. You may be happy like me eventually that the person is gone. I can't even remember everything I went thru cause I'm on a different vibration now. and i find that person and his choices very funny. haha I thought it was my tf cause of things i experienced but now i would not even care if it was. (I highly doubt the person you talk about is heading for a 'fairy tale' life. It probably only seems like that cause it's just the beginning stage of a relationship.)

[DaisySunshine]

Thank you both. I know it's irrational but I feel better talking about it with people who understand. Honestly, if I had been the one to leave I would be able to think that. But I can't stand being the one left, and I really regret not walking away when I had the chance. I can't stand him thinking I was negativity and he's better off without me, and that everything is roses with her. I can't accept her being better than me; she is not.

[Roxane9]

Originally Posted by DaisySunshine

I can't stand him thinking I was negativity and he's better off without me, and that everything is roses with her. I can't accept her being better than me; she is not.

TF brings up negativity from what I understand. No offense, but it doesn't matter what he thinks. ha. It's not about him. The form is illusion. The essence is real. Focus on you and your journey. The universe will bring you what you need then to continue on the path. Chasers make runners feel too good about themselves I think. haha.

[ForgedInFire]

Originally Posted by Roxane9

TF brings up negativity from what I understand. No offense, but it doesn't matter what he thinks. ha. It's not about him. The form is illusion. The essence is real. Focus on you and your journey. The universe will bring you what you need then to continue on the path..

Oh yes they absolutely do this. And theres absolutely no better way then a 3rd party to really get the ugly buried someone has out and front and center. And this is made in agreement with all involved before incarnating. Some just dont get the memo here and their bitterness forces the other tf to go marry that 3rd person and have children and live a happy life with no interest or even a second thought of the bitter tf. Thats what happens when one blames the tf and doesnt do their inner work. It repel them to stay far away for as long as it takes.. a year.. a decade 10 lifetimes.. theres no hurry for any reunion. the soul doesnt have any such hurry for it like the human ego does.

[A human Being]

Originally Posted by Roxane9

TF brings up negativity from what I understand. No offense, but it doesn't matter what he thinks. ha. It's not about him. The form is illusion. The essence is real. Focus on you and your journey. The universe will bring you what you need then to continue on the path.

This is exactly right, imo (particularly that first line - um yeah, do they ever!). I know situations like this can send you round the bend, but it really is about you at the end of the day. So give your attention to what is being triggered in you, don't fixate on your TF (again, I know that can be easier said than done, and I don't mean to suggest that I don't still do it myself sometimes).

[Roxane9]

Originally Posted by ForgedInFire

Oh yes they absolutely do this. And theres absolutely no better way then a 3rd party to really get the ugly buried someone has out and front and center. And this is made in agreement with all involved before incarnating. Some just dont get the memo here and their bitterness forces the other tf to go marry that 3rd person and have children and live a happy life with no interest or even a second thought of the bitter tf. Thats what happens when one blames the tf and doesnt do their inner work. It repel them to stay far away for as long as it takes.. a year.. a decade 10 lifetimes.. theres no hurry for any reunion. the soul doesnt have any such hurry for it like the human ego does.

Yes and the point is neither needs the TF for their path. The chaser is making that mistake. The universe knows better than any human mind. Don't try to control it. There are endless possibilities for the same thing and the human mind will limit that. A tf experience will teach you to let go of attachment.