Struggling to find work that fits me, issues with mental health

AstraeaLunaAvani · #1 16-10-2018, 11:55 PM

I am seeing a therapist but it isn't helping me at all so i thought i'd get some feedback from people who might understand me.

I am an introvert and I have also been having some anxiety/mental issues regarding work. I have found that I am too sensitive, I find work draining and stressful no matter what job I have. I quit working 4 months ago but i will run out of money eventually so I've been trying to find another job but it is freaking me out not being able to find anything. I have have like 13 jobs in just the last 10 years.

I am seeing the therapist but like I said, that doesn't seem to be working out. I tell her how loud busy fast paced situations overwhelm me, my brain can't handle that much stimulation. I need calm in my life as much as possible, and it's very hard to find a job that can give me that. I also have a bit of social anxiety and a phone phobia so working in customer service and doing phone work is out of the question. So far she doesn't have an answer for me, she just says she feels for me and can see how i feel stuck right now.

Is there anyone else out there like me who has trouble finding work for these same reasons?

Baile · #2 17-10-2018, 01:21 AM

Impossible to work for a living when you are overwhelmed in life. Even interacting with unconscious co-workers can be really difficult. That is tough.

So you can't get on medical/disability benefits for your condition? I would suggest work with seniors, or work with animals. Something that is needed if you want to be self-employed: offer a shopping/transit service for seniors and shut-ins. Do their shopping for them. Taxi them back and forth to the shopping center and help them while they shop. One-on-one work with people who are older, wiser and calmer, and who would appreciate a helping hand or sympathetic ear. Or animals who only require love.

Long-term therapy is helpful for serious emotional issues. It sounds like you are just ultra-sensitive. I am too since I recovered from depression. I haven't been to a movie or restaurant in years, it's too much being in a room with noisy, unfamiliar energy. I bought a house in the country, in nature. 99% of my social time is spent with the birds, animals, trees ocean and sky. That's my therapy and it has worked for me. All the best, you seem like a lovely soul and that is all that counts. It's just unfortunate you aren't free to just be that in life, it's heart-breaking really.

kuurt · #3 17-10-2018, 02:38 AM

Yeah I have this problem too. I have been unemployed for a long time. Most jobs I can't see myself doing. I've got bad social anxiety. My doctor told me that maybe I should try getting a job at the library. I have fearful and anxious feelings about getting out there and getting a job. I've also had like no friends or relationships in a long time because I don't get out much.

I need to get a job though, not just for money, but because part of me does want to be around people. I've been praying about it. That is something you can try. Pray for a job that you would enjoy.

AstraeaLunaAvani · #4 17-10-2018, 04:48 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Baile

So you can't get on medical/disability benefits for your condition? I would suggest work with seniors, or work with animals. Something that is needed if you want to be self-employed: offer a shopping/transit service for seniors and shut-ins. Do their shopping for them. Taxi them back and forth to the shopping center and help them while they shop. One-on-one work with people who are older, wiser and calmer, and who would appreciate a helping hand or sympathetic ear. Or animals who only require love.

So far my therapist has not mentioned getting on disability, nor has she suggested medication or medical marijuana for my anxiety. I am not cut out for working with people, but I do like some animals (just not a dog person, lol) I love cats though. I have been trying to find a cat sitting job but a lot of them don't really pay (they're mostly housesitting jobs who let you stay there instead of paying you).

Quote:

Long-term therapy is helpful for serious emotional issues. It sounds like you are just ultra-sensitive. I am too since I recovered from depression. I haven't been to a movie or restaurant in years, it's too much being in a room with noisy, unfamiliar energy. I bought a house in the country, in nature. 99% of my social time is spent with the birds, animals, trees ocean and sky. That's my therapy and it has worked for me. All the best, you seem like a lovely soul and that is all that counts. It's just unfortunate you aren't free to just be that in life, it's heart-breaking really.

Thanks! And sorry you had to go through this too, sounds like you were worse than me. I can go out to movies and restaurants, as long as I don't have to work in public places. I would LOVE to live where you are and be surrounded by nature, that was my goal but I don't have enough money.

AstraeaLunaAvani · #5 17-10-2018, 04:51 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kuurt

Yeah I have this problem too. I have been unemployed for a long time. Most jobs I can't see myself doing. I've got bad social anxiety. My doctor told me that maybe I should try getting a job at the library. I have fearful and anxious feelings about getting out there and getting a job. I've also had like no friends or relationships in a long time because I don't get out much.

I need to get a job though, not just for money, but because part of me does want to be around people. I've been praying about it. That is something you can try. Pray for a job that you would enjoy.

Sorry to hear that, sounds like you have it worse than me! Did your doctor put you on disability in the meantime, or give you any medications for your anxiety? I would love to work in a library too but those jobs require degrees, you wouldn't think they would but all the ones I've seen do. Plus you still have to help the patrons so you don't really get a break from customer service (that's my biggest thing I can't do).

Baile · #6 17-10-2018, 10:59 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AstraeaLunaAvani

And sorry you had to go through this too, sounds like you were worse than me.

Thanks. I was on medication for a time but it wasn't for me. So I went the holistic healing route. It took seven years before my anxiety in public places finally went away. I can go to a restuarant, but it is still very difficult to be there in the noise. I spend almost all my "away from home" time either kayaking, walking, biking, ocean viewing, or bird watching. None of which requires interacting with or listening to humans!

Im actually happy, just damaged forever I guess. But in a good way I think. Having dealt with this holistically was key for me. It allowed me to go inward for a time to truly see and understand myself, and my relationship with the world. As a result I have lost interest in most mundane human things, and shifted to a deep love and appreciation for nature. That is the key IMO and BTW: LOVE. I have read some of your other posts. Just love them. Love your friends who hold different views than you. And if you can't stand their views and cannot love them, say goodbye and let them go. That is also an act of love because it frees them as well.

Love your funky trailer. Love its needy repair state. Do what you can to fix it, with the small amount of money you have, all with love. Life in all its manifestations, is love. We just need to open our eyes and hearts to see it. That is what anxiety and depression is: the soul having lost the ability to see all the love in the world; having lost that joyful innocent-soul connection to life in the way we as children naturally had it.

Baile · #7 17-10-2018, 11:41 AM

One more thing, to clear up possible confusion:

I mean it when I say life in all its manifestations, is love. But that doesn't mean we have to accept and put up with life in all its manifestations. With unpleasant and unwanted manifestions of life, we can lovingly acknowledge it for what it is, and then lovingly walk away from it. I walked away from people many years ago. I couldn't stand (and still can't) certain forms of human behaviour. But in the years that have gone by, I have learned to love humanity. But on my terms. I enjoy pleasant conversations with happy, conscious people. And I walk away from noisy people and crowds, and unfriendly and unfocused energy. Which is self-love. I love myself as well, and I lovingly choose for myself that which brings me joy and inspires my soul.

AstraeaLunaAvani · #8 17-10-2018, 06:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Baile

Thanks. I was on medication for a time but it wasn't for me. So I went the holistic healing route. It took seven years before my anxiety in public places finally went away. I can go to a restuarant, but it is still very difficult to be there in the noise. I spend almost all my "away from home" time either kayaking, walking, biking, ocean viewing, or bird watching. None of which requires interacting with or listening to humans!

I am into holistic healing too, although so far nothing has helped my anxiety because I think it stems from the whole work issue I have. If I had a steady income that I didnt have to suffer to receive, and could live in a calm place where I can be surrounded by nature like you are, then I think it would naturally dissolve.

Quote:

Im actually happy, just damaged forever I guess. But in a good way I think. Having dealt with this holistically was key for me. It allowed me to go inward for a time to truly see and understand myself, and my relationship with the world. As a result I have lost interest in most mundane human things, and shifted to a deep love and appreciation for nature. That is the key IMO and BTW: LOVE. I have read some of your other posts. Just love them. Love your friends who hold different views than you. And if you can't stand their views and cannot love them, say goodbye and let them go. That is also an act of love because it frees them as well.

Love your funky trailer. Love its needy repair state. Do what you can to fix it, with the small amount of money you have, all with love. Life in all its manifestations, is love. We just need to open our eyes and hearts to see it. That is what anxiety and depression is: the soul having lost the ability to see all the love in the world; having lost that joyful innocent-soul connection to life in the way we as children naturally had it.

That's pretty much what I do, I love them as much as I can. And I got rid of the boyfriends that were not good for me so now I am able to focus on myself!

AstraeaLunaAvani · #9 17-10-2018, 06:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Baile

One more thing, to clear up possible confusion:

I mean it when I say life in all its manifestations, is love. But that doesn't mean we have to accept and put up with life in all its manifestations. With unpleasant and unwanted manifestions of life, we can lovingly acknowledge it for what it is, and then lovingly walk away from it. I walked away from people many years ago. I couldn't stand (and still can't) certain forms of human behaviour. But in the years that have gone by, I have learned to love humanity. But on my terms. I enjoy pleasant conversations with happy, conscious people. And I walk away from noisy people and crowds, and unfriendly and unfocused energy. Which is self-love. I love myself as well, and I lovingly choose for myself that which brings me joy and inspires my soul.

Yes! Me too!

It's getting easier to walk away from things that don't serve me!

Baile · #10 17-10-2018, 07:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AstraeaLunaAvani

Yes! Me too!

It's getting easier to walk away from things that don't serve me!

That's great to hear. Years ago it was often tough to do. Then, after decades of being beaten up, it got to a point where I just did it without thinking about it, because my survival depended on it.