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Go Back   Spiritual Forums > Spirituality & Beliefs > Soulmates & Twin Flames

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  #1  
Old 12-10-2017, 05:10 PM
Delay_Reaction Delay_Reaction is offline
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Does healing occur in union or in separation?

<<To pre-face this post, anytime I refer to "being with your twin", I mean having some kind of regular contact with your twin and not necessarily in a romantic relationship. >>

I am starting to wonder when does healing actually takes place? When you are with your twin or when you are apart?

I am in a situation where I can establish regular contact with my twin, but I choose not to. If I did, it would feel like I was chasing her, expecting her to return my messages. It doesn't feel like I am learning anything this way.

When she contacts me, it's always pleasant and it genuinely feels like she wants to reach out to me. It's more natural for me because I am not the one initiating contact. But maybe she also just wants to satisfy her ego by keeping me on a leash? If so, then we aren't actually healing any wounds.

I guess my question is, if you truly know who your TF is, does it make more sense to heal yourself on your own or figure this out together with your twin? Or is it somewhere in the middle?

Would healing be expedited with regular TF contact? or Without?

Should you figure it all out on your own before attempting to establish some kind of friendship/relationship with your TF?

I don't see myself being friends with my TF at this time while she is in another relationship. It doesn't seem like an appropriate label either to say that we are just friends or more than friends. It's obviously more than friends but it feels wrong to label it.

I'm just curious if there are others who are wondering the same thing.

Is there any actual benefit to being together with your TF?
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  #2  
Old 12-10-2017, 05:54 PM
FairyCrystal FairyCrystal is offline
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I feel the answer is: both.
Typically you have already done a lot of work otherwise you wouldn't be near the vibration of meeting your TF.
Then there's the last -and often deepest and thus most difficult- remaining bits to heal. They tend to get triggered by your TF because they touch you so deeply.
I think it varies whether you then heal alone or together or a combination of the two. It depends where you were on your path. If you were quite ready to enter a TF relationship, then I think you do it both yourself and together. If you weren't quite that ready yet, you will likely separate, either temporarily or permanently this life. Then you work things out on your own.

When one is in a relationship I think that leaves you with little other option than to do it yourself, unless you can bear and feel like being friends-only.
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  #3  
Old 12-10-2017, 07:45 PM
Ariaecheflame Ariaecheflame is offline
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Both.


Usually I do my inner work 'alone'... we are married so... alone means I am in a seperate space of the home LOL or... one of us goes on a little holiday.

And then when we come back together... there is usually a new level of forgiveness and harmony... which only deepens the healing.

When we first started dating and I was heavily in my 'runner' stages... I would leave... many 1000's of km's of 'space' and healing would take about 6 months of alone time with regular phone contact haha.

Now days... it takes a few days of claiming our own seperate spaces for a bit.
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  #4  
Old 12-10-2017, 08:16 PM
Ariaecheflame Ariaecheflame is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by FairyCrystal
I feel the answer is: both.
Typically you have already done a lot of work otherwise you wouldn't be near the vibration of meeting your TF.
Then there's the last -and often deepest and thus most difficult- remaining bits to heal. They tend to get triggered by your TF because they touch you so deeply.
I think it varies whether you then heal alone or together or a combination of the two. It depends where you were on your path. If you were quite ready to enter a TF relationship, then I think you do it both yourself and together. If you weren't quite that ready yet, you will likely separate, either temporarily or permanently this life. Then you work things out on your own.

When one is in a relationship I think that leaves you with little other option than to do it yourself, unless you can bear and feel like being friends-only.


I find this idea strange - that you have to be of a particular vibration to meet your twin... it sort of got me thinking lol... so thankyou.

I feel that we are always the right vibration for our tfs - it is our unique universal signature which magnetisies them to us.

I feel like it is more... coming into harmony or intergrating our natural vibration here onnearth rather than raising it to a certain vibration. We are already a unique expression of the universe of love at our core...

I am just going to disect my own story a bit - to see if this idea makes sense to me lol!!

I did actually meet and hang out with my TF and my catalyst mirror from ages 14 - 17 and then our seperation (tf and I) where we lost all contact thought we had lost each other lasted for one year.
Our happiest time together before we lost contact was when we were both 15 - just before I spiralled very deeply into depression. We lost contact and missed each other - and started telepathic/empathetic communication... and I sort of just started to come good... but still deeply troubled at 18.

tf and I got together when we were 18 - and I was pretty happy at the time but still had not dealt with the deep trauma of my childhood... my depression would surface with a vengence every few months.

After I had my child - she had just started school and I suddenly had space for healing - my catalyst soul mate came back into my conciousness and set off this stream of healing.

Tf and I were mostly together through all of this healing - I ran away from him frequently and even moved out a few times - but he should just hold me in his love.
So even when we were seperated by 1000's of km's we were never really seperated.

I do wonder - why my story unfolded this way... and often I feel like this love saved my life.
Many times in the pit of despair - tf would hold a space filled with love - without it I wouldn't be here it was my lifeline which held me here on earth.

Another thing I have noticed - as I have done so much healing/ harmonising and balancing is my vibration is pretty much the same as it always was... lol - it is unique to me - it is the same soul essence which has always been there - it is more a matter that I am fully integrated, body mind and spirit with my souls true harmonic vibration. Where as before I was not intergrated with it.

So it makes me really realise that - the true frequency of TFs is always in harmony on a soul level - it is more the fact that the two souls begin to intergrate harmoniously on all levels within the earth plane 3d -

It is more about learning harmonious intergration within our bodies, minds and the universe and the TF. All things we were never actually seperate from.

So still a vibrational thing... but not in a sense of reaching a certain vibration... we have no where to go only full integration with our souls 'note' more in a sense of coming into harmony with the universe.
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  #5  
Old 12-10-2017, 08:31 PM
Badcopyinc
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If both are in early stages of growth/healing they will clash and ego's will flare.
when a low vibration person meets a high vibration person it teaches both a lesson.

the low vibration individual learns that the world doesn't control their situation they do.

and the high vibration person learns to maintain growth while not allowing their mirror to lower their vibration.

These lessons cause separation if resistance is present and during separation self reflection takes place and then both can proceed with change and growth.
this can be done together but only if neither is resisting. Both must learn to surrender to resisting. or to recognize anger and fear for what they truly are, issues with self.

after there is no resistance than healing can take place together or in separation. the amount of growth/healing relies on the individuals true goals and inspirations.
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  #6  
Old 12-10-2017, 08:34 PM
ssdm1 ssdm1 is offline
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Join Date: Apr 2016
Posts: 652
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Delay_Reaction
<<To pre-face this post, anytime I refer to "being with your twin", I mean having some kind of regular contact with your twin and not necessarily in a romantic relationship. >>

I am starting to wonder when does healing actually takes place? When you are with your twin or when you are apart?

I am in a situation where I can establish regular contact with my twin, but I choose not to. If I did, it would feel like I was chasing her, expecting her to return my messages. It doesn't feel like I am learning anything this way.

When she contacts me, it's always pleasant and it genuinely feels like she wants to reach out to me. It's more natural for me because I am not the one initiating contact. But maybe she also just wants to satisfy her ego by keeping me on a leash? If so, then we aren't actually healing any wounds.

I guess my question is, if you truly know who your TF is, does it make more sense to heal yourself on your own or figure this out together with your twin? Or is it somewhere in the middle?

Would healing be expedited with regular TF contact? or Without?

Should you figure it all out on your own before attempting to establish some kind of friendship/relationship with your TF?

I don't see myself being friends with my TF at this time while she is in another relationship. It doesn't seem like an appropriate label either to say that we are just friends or more than friends. It's obviously more than friends but it feels wrong to label it.

I'm just curious if there are others who are wondering the same thing.

Is there any actual benefit to being together with your TF?

It's somewhere in the middle. We both healed separately for 20 years. Today we heal together and separately at times. When together things come up quicker and more intensely, but I feel get cleared quicker. I can now clear something difficult in just a few days.

I know how you feel about this but are you sure about not initiating contact with her? I really like when mine contacts me first, let's me know he's thinking of me and keeping the connection.

As for actual benefits - I'm still wondering that one, lol.

The entire 30 years we've know each other we have been friends, as well as more than friends, while being in other relationships. As teens we would double date (him choosing my date, of course) - we were "together" but not. Today things are still the same. I invite him and his gf to attend things with me.

Always together but always apart.
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  #7  
Old 12-10-2017, 09:06 PM
gypsymystique gypsymystique is offline
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Healing occurs with both.
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  #8  
Old 13-10-2017, 03:12 AM
psychegrl psychegrl is offline
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I concur with everyone that it's both but would add that healing never stops. Just like with learning, there is always something more out there. New information to decipher and integrate.

We are always becoming. Each lesson will further teach us to love ourselves or that there is pain with unmet expectations.

Great post! ♡
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  #9  
Old 13-10-2017, 03:51 AM
Aloneyetnot Aloneyetnot is offline
Knower
Join Date: Jun 2017
Posts: 150
 
Excellent topic of discussion

Quote:
Originally Posted by Delay_Reaction
<<To pre-face this post, anytime I refer to "being with your twin", I mean having some kind of regular contact with your twin and not necessarily in a romantic relationship. >>

I am starting to wonder when does healing actually takes place? When you are with your twin or when you are apart?

I am in a situation where I can establish regular contact with my twin, but I choose not to. If I did, it would feel like I was chasing her, expecting her to return my messages. It doesn't feel like I am learning anything this way.

When she contacts me, it's always pleasant and it genuinely feels like she wants to reach out to me. It's more natural for me because I am not the one initiating contact. But maybe she also just wants to satisfy her ego by keeping me on a leash? If so, then we aren't actually healing any wounds.

I guess my question is, if you truly know who your TF is, does it make more sense to heal yourself on your own or figure this out together with your twin? Or is it somewhere in the middle?

Would healing be expedited with regular TF contact? or Without?

Should you figure it all out on your own before attempting to establish some kind of friendship/relationship with your TF?

I don't see myself being friends with my TF at this time while she is in another relationship. It doesn't seem like an appropriate label either to say that we are just friends or more than friends. It's obviously more than friends but it feels wrong to label it.

I'm just curious if there are others who are wondering the same thing.

Is there any actual benefit to being together with your TF?


I feel that everyone's posts are spot on... it's both. Your (and ssdm1's) comments on initiating versus not initiating contact are interesting. My tf has suddenly shut me out 3 times within a span of 15 years. Once for about 5 years, then three months, and most recently a year. In each situation, I'd reach out and would get no reply, out of nowhere. His main reason for "disappearing" is due to the fact that has such strong feelings for me. I've decided that the best way to protect myself from being hurt like that is to not initiate contact. If I don't initiate, he can't shut me out, thus hurt me. He seems to have picked up on that, and I'm sure he knows why. I know he'd love to have me initiate, but fool me once, fool me twice, and all that stuff. He always keeps coming back, wanting to validate that I still care while letting me know that he does. I've let him know that I'll always love him and be here, no matter what. We're both runners and chasers, but in different ways.

The one thing that never changes is that the healing process never ends.
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  #10  
Old 13-10-2017, 04:03 AM
Ariaecheflame Ariaecheflame is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by psychegrl
I concur with everyone that it's both but would add that healing never stops. Just like with learning, there is always something more out there. New information to decipher and integrate.

We are always becoming. Each lesson will further teach us to love ourselves or that there is pain with unmet expectations.

Great post! ♡


The great mystery is always unfolding - just as the universe is always creating.
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