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Originally Posted by PilotOfTime
There has been something on my mind that I can't seem to let go:
I've been trying to become attuned with the spiritual world for a little while now, and I've only had a little bit of luck communicating with other beings. However, sometimes I can't help but wonder what they know about me beyond what I have purposely revealed. I am aware that archangels, guides, etc. have the ability to telepathically/emotionally communicate with us, but sometimes it worries me. I often fear judgement because I am very ashamed of my past and I'm so self-conscious. I would love (more than anything) to be 100% open with someone and have the shame lifted away. But here's the main issue: I'm not used to that feeling of "unconditional love" that many people have mentioned in the presence of their angels and guides, and I don't know how to fully let them in. I'm not sure how to handle the vulnerability when it's such a foreign experience. 
Some advice would be wonderful. I'd really appreciate it. |
I have a problem with feeling shame and embarassment. It's something that you can't get over unless you work at it all the time. Just because someone loves you unconditionally it doesn't mean that you would stop judging yourself through their eyes. Unfortunately.
The only way to "work on it" is to just slowly overtime expand your thinking and your knowledge about human nature.
For exampl, my guides said that people are not "bad", but they are "babies". In other words, when you feel bad about yourself and think that you're ugly (from your perspective), the guides use the perspective that "you're just a baby, so of course you can't do things yet"... And babies are always cute to mothers.
I was suprised when I heard guides say: you are very special and we have so much love for you (referring to the people). And I did not understand. We are so "ugly" (in behavior), why would they even love us? Turns out, immaturity (which we perceive as ugly) is just a stage of being a baby. And mothers love babies even though they bite and fall and poop and can't even clean themselves. And fight (when toddlers). And disobey. And... such a bother to take care of... I mean they require so much patience and time trying to watch over them.
But do mothers still want them? Of course. Do they still love them? Of course.
Also, my guides said that whatever strength you have, it is there BECAUSE of the weaknesses that you have. In other words, if your weaknesses were gone, you wouldn't be you and you wouldn't have whatever strength you have (because sometimes weakenesses cause our strenghts to come through).
PLUS, even the "bad" is necessary in order for some to learn "good". So the "bad" are like serving the purpose. They are there for a reason. How could you learn patience if there was no one trying your patience, for example?
Plus, the units of consciousness (of which we ALL are made up of) take turns forming themselves into good "persons" sometimes and "bad" persons at other times.
it's like when you play "cops and robbers".... One of you has to play the bad guy, otherwise, there is no game.
Bad people (or whatever people who did something they are ashamed of) are actually deserving a medal. I mean it really doesn't feel good to be "bad" or to be doing stuff you are ashamed of. But you have to exist (for a purpose). You have to play the "bad" guy. And it's not easy. Good people can have the rewards of feeling good about themselves. But bad people have this mission of being bad and even have to feel bad about themselves after they cross over because they are so ashamed. It's painful to be bad. But someone has to do it. So the units of consciousness which form themselves into a bad person (or a weak person) should be proud of themselves because they are doing all of us a favor and then have to bear the burden of guilt and shame for being bad or weak.
Think about it. You are born this way. You can't change yourself. And what you have? It's guilt, it's shame and you have to live with it. It's not an easy job. And then later you will feel even more guilt and shame about yourself (even if you know that you're unconditionally loved). And you have to go through counseling to get over that.
it's like imagine this perfect pure person. And imagine that she was sold into prostitution. Imagine how soiled she will get. How ashamed she will feel. And how others will look down at her. But it's not really her fault. It's just her fate. She is just unfortunate. Or imagine mothers who try to feed their children and sell their bodies. People look down at them, but they should be pitied instead.
People are proud of those who are all pure and good. But usually this is only the case when they are in the pure and good situation and they never get "soiled" by the bad situations of the world.
Pure and good is tested when you're placed in some OTHER situation. Imagine that you live in a world of killers and you're pure and good... and yet, you have to adjust and adapt and work within that system.... That's no fun.
So, people who have weaknesses and who are bad are actually pitied (not judged) because it's not easy for them. Especially since they can't feel good about themselves. And they were not the ones who placed themselves into this kind of life, it just so happened.
But the guides said that we ALL will be good eventually. Just like children grow up, so the "bad" people turn into good eventualy (over lifetimes).
So there is no reason for them to be ashamed of us because they know better. So that's why to them we are precious, like babies are precious to mothers.
And like I said before, we are all made of the same stuff. The same living energy. And sometimes it forms itself into bad forms and sometimes into good forms. And it's like taking roles and playing a bad guy in a game because someone has to do it. Life or existence is not possible without the bad. There is no such thing as creating perfection in one instant. there is no such thing as knowing all without having to learn it. So that's why bad is a necessary ingredient of existence. And whoever says that bad does not serve a purpose does not undersatnd that existence cannot be, that learning cannot take place, without the "bad".
So the best thing to do is try your best, undersatnd that you can only do so much and realize that those in higher places know all this (what I said) and do not feel the need to judge you. Because if they judged you, it would be like YOU, as a mother or a father, scoffing and judging your infant for not being able to walk. If someone judges for that, they are dumb themselves. And the guides are usually not that dumb.
But I brush it off.. they're not bothered about all that stuff. They just watch you and guide you.
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