Struggling to meditate

[Gem]

Originally Posted by george_amy

I'm hoping someone may be able to help me.

I've been told I need to meditate,

I don't think a reasonable person would tell you what you need.

which I'm more an happy to do and want to do more importantly. My problem is that I just can't seem to do it. I've tried several different methods but have been told to try guided, which I have. I have been offered help by someone but it means going to them and it will take me and hour to get to them and sadly I haven't got that time spare.

When I do attempt to meditate I just can't seem to shut off or if following a guided meditation I'm told to imagine something I just can't see it. It's not like I give up after five minutes either, I've sat there literally for an hour at times and all it's doing is leaving me feeling more agitated and stressed.

If you're still interested, george_amy, one of the first things you'll need is a reason to meditate.

Then there will be certain disciplines (sorry about the word but that's what they are!) you'll learn on the fly, deep relaxation, deep breathing, stilling your mind as far as you can, and developing concentration and/or contemplation. These things unfortunately take a little time for a newcomer, unless you're one of the gifted few who 'get into it' straight away.

Good luck, anyway.

[Dwerg]

Oh, one more thing. Feeling a need to meditate won't make it easier. Can't relax if someone pushes you and stress you to relax right? It's like telling someone who is really angry to just calm down, it simply doesn't work.

[sea-dove]

It's not like I give up after five minutes either, I've sat there literally for an hour at times and all it's doing is leaving me feeling more agitated and stressed.

Thats obviously way too long for you to be doing it. I usually suggest 20mins for actual meditation for a beginner and up to 10mins for progressive body relaxation techniques first. (so 30mins max .. this can be done once or twice a day).

Progressive body relaxation is when one in an unrushed manner goes over the body, slowly focusing on it part by part, tensing the muscles and then releasing, while thinking of the body part relaxing. Sometimes a very tense person may need to go over their whole body a couple of times in this manner before starting to do any other kind of meditaton. I suggest to do this first.

The other issue you seem to have is "trying too hard", hence feeling stressed and agitated. Dont try to do anything.. just be still and allow yourself to relax. This is the simpliest form of meditation.

When I do attempt to meditate I just can't seem to shut off or if following a guided meditation I'm told to imagine something I just can't see it.

If you cant shut off.. dont worry about it at all. Just allow yourself to observe your thoughts or just make yourself focus on one thing eg watching your breath and bring your mind back to that when its gone into thinking about your daily life stuff.

The most important thing about meditation is RELAX.

[Gem]

I usually meditate for an hour or more at a time, and use a timer which sounds at the end.

People think meditation is a nice kinda thing, but it's nasty and nice and everything in between. The stresses and anxieties and impatience that happen are maybe uncomfortable, but they give insight into a persons inner condition.

I've sat alone in a dark room and meditated for days, and I found that all the personal moody ups and down and stresses and calms that we think are caused by things that happen to us in our lives still go up and down in the absence of anything happening, and it becomes most apparent that we generate it all internally.

Hi Gem I have been a meditator for 30 years. Twice a day mainly. I have never ever missed once a day in those thirty years. Meditation is easy. It's people that complicate it. Here are some steps to follow.

Number 1. YOU do not need to silence your mind!!! No one can. You actually go beyond mind but you won't know you are there. What you will know is that you feel very peacefull.
Number 2. Never do more than twenty minutes twice a day.
Number 3 Never use an alarm at the end of your meditation, because it is bad for your nervous system. When you think the times is up just sqint at your watch or clock. Eventually you WILL get a built in clock that tells you when the time is up.
Number 4. You need two things for this meditation. Thoughts and mantra. That's RIGHT. THOUGHTS.


Following these rules will anable you to meditate EASILY.

So sit up, back straight, feet on floor. Close eyes. Take ONE deep breath, sigh the air away. Using a word (mantra) start repeating it in your mind. Peace is a good word.

So you say, on an in breath, PEACE, and on the out breath PEACE. Keep the breaths GENTLE and long. After a few you will find you start thinking. THATS RIGHT. Once you realise you are thinking, gently go back to your word. It's going back and forth from manta to thought that helps you trancend. This means going beyond thought. You will NEVER know you have done this. But as I said you will feel peaceful and the time will go quickly eventually. Practising this twice a day everyday will bring you many rewards.

[Gem]

Originally Posted by Rosemary

Hi Gem I have been a meditator for 30 years. Twice a day mainly. I have never ever missed once a day in those thirty years. Meditation is easy. It's people that complicate it. Here are some steps to follow.

Number 1. YOU do not need to silence your mind!!! No one can. You actually go beyond mind but you won't know you are there. What you will know is that you feel very peacefull.

I can silence the mind, but I don't mind the chatter either.

Number 2. Never do more than twenty minutes twice a day.

Disagree

Number 3 Never use an alarm at the end of your meditation, because it is bad for your nervous system. When you think the times is up just sqint at your watch or clock. Eventually you WILL get a built in clock that tells you when the time is up.

Timer doesn't bother me at all. I generally tend to know when it's about time to go off, but sometimes I'm surprised that it goes off very quickly and other times it seems to take a very long time.

Number 4. You need two things for this meditation. Thoughts and mantra. That's RIGHT. THOUGHTS.

I don't use imagination, mantra or any volition at all.

Following these rules will anable you to meditate EASILY.

Sometimes meditation is easy and other times it's pretty hard.

So sit up, back straight, feet on floor. Close eyes. Take ONE deep breath, sigh the air away. Using a word (mantra) start repeating it in your mind. Peace is a good word.

I don't think that's a sound methodology

So you say, on an in breath, PEACE, and on the out breath PEACE. Keep the breaths GENTLE and long. After a few you will find you start thinking. THATS RIGHT. Once you realise you are thinking, gently go back to your word. It's going back and forth from manta to thought that helps you trancend. This means going beyond thought. You will NEVER know you have done this. But as I said you will feel peaceful and the time will go quickly eventually. Practising this twice a day everyday will bring you many rewards.

I don't think that is suitable to me at all.

[jonesboy]

You are arguing over technique.

I can tell you doing more than 20 minutes at a time of "I AM" mantra meditation will send you into overload. Maybe not right away but it will. Now breath meditation is a different story and could be done longer.

But why?

The point of meditation is not to escape from life, it is to make life better. That is why it is best to do two quick sessions and then get out and enjoy it!

GEM,

Your method is different than others. I can tell you that Rosemary's method is simiular to many other methods.

The method I use from AYP.

The basics would be:
Start with 10 mins of I AM mantra.
Sit in a bed with pillows to prop up your back. You can cross your legs or not to start.
Begin by watching your thoughts and then after a few minutes begin with I AM. When you notice you are off of the mantra just gently return to the mantra at whatever level that may be.

I AM was chosen because the it's vibrational quality. It is important not to just make junk up because it sounds good. As an example an advanced version of the mantra works the crown with the vibrations. Unless you are very advanced just choosing a word to use could have some unwanted effects.