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Go Back   Spiritual Forums > Spirituality & Beliefs > Healing

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  #21  
Old Yesterday, 03:04 AM
Badcopyinc Badcopyinc is offline
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This is a beautiful post.
Reminds me of an osho quote.
He equated sadness as being the roots of a tree and the branches being happiness. The deeper the roots the taller the tree and the taller the tree the deeper the roots. Signifying the balance of life using sadness and happiness.

I feel as though all trauma is teaching us to enjoy the opposite that much more.

Much like therapy when you accept what happened and surrender to it so to say the more you heal then move on from it and go deeper into self. The more you go deeper into self the more power you have. The more power you have the happier or more at peace you are.
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  #22  
Old Yesterday, 04:51 AM
starnight1 starnight1 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Badcopyinc
This is a beautiful post.
Reminds me of an osho quote.
He equated sadness as being the roots of a tree and the branches being happiness. The deeper the roots the taller the tree and the taller the tree the deeper the roots. Signifying the balance of life using sadness and happiness.

.
without dark night, there will be no sun rise:)
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  #23  
Old Yesterday, 04:56 PM
wanchain wanchain is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Seawolf
Yes it included family. It was one of the big steps in my healing journey. It's seems to be a big part of alot of people's recovery who have developmental trauma. No one told me to do it, it was a natural part of the process. It's difficult though and I'm glad I had support from my therapists, recovery friends and people on the internet.

Hmm ... This one is a bit challenging for me too, because it is a question of cutting off from my roots, or sticking with them. Or stay somewhere in between.

I find that I made a lot more progress (and with greater ease) when I was away from them. We keep in touch, but our interaction is much reduced.

Wanchain
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  #24  
Old Yesterday, 04:58 PM
wanchain wanchain is offline
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Join Date: Sep 2014
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Badcopyinc
This is a beautiful post.
Reminds me of an osho quote.
He equated sadness as being the roots of a tree and the branches being happiness. The deeper the roots the taller the tree and the taller the tree the deeper the roots. Signifying the balance of life using sadness and happiness.

I feel as though all trauma is teaching us to enjoy the opposite that much more.

Much like therapy when you accept what happened and surrender to it so to say the more you heal then move on from it and go deeper into self. The more you go deeper into self the more power you have. The more power you have the happier or more at peace you are.

That analogy is really fitting! Thank you for sharing! ^_^

Yes, I agree with you on going deeper. This inward journey is really rewarding!
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  #25  
Old Yesterday, 05:12 PM
Seawolf Seawolf is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by wanchain
Or stay somewhere in between.

I find that I made a lot more progress (and with greater ease) when I was away from them. We keep in touch, but our interaction is much reduced.

Wanchain

I have to do what is made clear to me I need to do even if it's hard. For me it was complete separation but I can't speak for anyone else. I was being retraumatized by any contact at all.
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  #26  
Old Yesterday, 10:35 PM
wanchain wanchain is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Seawolf
I have to do what is made clear to me I need to do even if it's hard. For me it was complete separation but I can't speak for anyone else. I was being retraumatized by any contact at all.

Hmm ... is it a temporary separation or a permanent one?

With blood relations, there is a link at the vibrational level--the emotions and thoughts in the molecules--such that when you shift at the molecular level, they will shift too, although to a lesser degree. For example, when the intensity of my rage went down, my father's also went down.

But at the neurological level, I find that they cannot shift unconsciously. If they are habituated to behave in a certain way, then they will still do so, unless you start to behave differently in front of them, then they will have to adjust to your new behavior. I think this requires a bit of conscious effort on their part.
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  #27  
Old Today, 01:25 AM
Seawolf Seawolf is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by wanchain
Hmm ... is it a temporary separation or a permanent one?

With blood relations, there is a link at the vibrational level--the emotions and thoughts in the molecules--such that when you shift at the molecular level, they will shift too, although to a lesser degree. For example, when the intensity of my rage went down, my father's also went down.

But at the neurological level, I find that they cannot shift unconsciously. If they are habituated to behave in a certain way, then they will still do so, unless you start to behave differently in front of them, then they will have to adjust to your new behavior. I think this requires a bit of conscious effort on their part.
It had to be a complete separation for me. I tried minimal contact and temporary separation for a long time and it didn't work. But again, I can't speak for anyone else. That's where things went naturally for me. I tried to hold on and every time it resulted in very bad retraumatization. The only way for me to get better was to detach completely. That's when the healing went to a new level for me. It took me a long time and lots of pain because I guess I had to go through all that to finally realize it wasn't going to work. A part of me inside thought maybe one day this person will love me, or maybe I can fix this person, or my guilt or loneliness kept me going back. In the end I had to make a determined final decision, there was no other choice. Anger is very useful in that situation. I don't think I would have been able to do it without support either, it's not an easy thing to go through.
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