Please Heal Me

[Dargor]

Unfortunately I can do nothing but agree with you, because you are totally right about this world and it's inhabitants. Just like me, you see the world as it truly is and that is something admirable. So why would that need to be fixed? So you can start seeing rainbows and unicorns everywhere? That won't change anything at all.

To anyone else who might feel the need to ''correct'' me: be free to call me a pessimist, misanthropist, or whatever else you want but I don't care.

[Shivani Devi]

Originally Posted by SlayerOfLight

Unfortunately I can do nothing but agree with you, because you are totally right about this world and it's inhabitants. Just like me, you see the world as it truly is and that is something admirable. So why would that need to be fixed? So you can start seeing rainbows and unicorns everywhere? That won't change anything at all.

To anyone else who might feel the need to ''correct'' me: be free to call me a pessimist, misanthropist, or whatever else you want but I don't care.

Thank you for the confidence..

It isn't so I can see the world as rainbows and unicorns...It is so that I can communicate with others who are still at that level without feeling like a huge hypocrite because I "know different" and this is what I struggle with on a daily basis..when "as it truly is" STILL comes across to another as "how you perceive it to be" simply because they are unable to see it that way and there's absolutely nothing I can do about that but not talk to a living soul because they are "not ready to understand it yet" and talking about the weather, Sports, land values, the royal wedding and what was eaten for lunch bores me to tears.

[captainamerica]

I will think about it more and let you know but I just wanted to let you know first that I am totally here if you need me, for anything,my friend.

There are many fake aghoris in Benaras/Varanasi (India) only in it for the money but those who are real , I consider them to be Shiv ji himself.The real aghoris have tremendous healing power as you know.

I am trying to meet one, maybe you can meet one in the city in India. If you cannot afford it then If I meet one then I'll ask the Aghori Babaji to heal you. I promise I'll remember to ask Babaji when I meet one.

I have a Yogi Babaji in my village should I ask them to try to heal you? He does not listen to me every time, he cannot even be my guru because he is restricted to be anyone's guru, but I'll try my level best that he listens to my request to heal you and he even helped me heal my mental problems many times and sometimes he gives insights that proved to be valuable to me as I applied them.

How frequent are the anxiety attacks ?

That is all I got for now but I'll think more about it.

[Shivani Devi]

Originally Posted by captainamerica

I will think about it more and let you know but I just wanted to let you know first that I am totally here if you need me, for anything,my friend.

There are many fake aghoris in Benaras/Varanasi (India) only in it for the money but those who are real , I consider them to be Shiv ji himself.The real aghoris have tremendous healing power as you know.

I am trying to meet one, maybe you can meet one in the city in India. If you cannot afford it then If I meet one then I'll ask the Aghori Babaji to heal you. I promise I'll remember to ask Babaji when I meet one.

I have a Yogi Babaji in my village should I ask them to try to heal you? He does not listen to me every time, he cannot even be my guru because he is restricted to be anyone's guru, but I'll try my level best that he listens to my request to heal you and he even helped me heal my mental problems many times and sometimes he gives insights that proved to be valuable to me as I applied them.

How frequent are the anxiety attacks ?

That is all I got for now but I'll think more about it.

Thanks my dear...and yup, I DID give comment tonight about all of those "fake Aghoris" in the Hindu forum.

You are indeed privileged to have these beings at your disposal, when I am limited to my "soul family" in the Astral..

Not that this is necessarily a bad thing, but I tend to come back down into 3D reality with a crashing, soul numbing thud...and the more times I get healed by my "ancestral Aghori tribe" the more difficult it becomes to try to assimilate in the world of monkeys, just to eke out an existence here.

I appreciate your friendship and I am also yours...and I guess that it "takes a Hindu to know a Hindu" and I really should be looking into associating more with "my own kind" to balance this out.

The anxiety attacks only happen when another imposes themselves upon my privacy without understanding anything...or gets in my way just for fun when I am actually trying to make a go of something.

[Dargor]

Originally Posted by Shivani Devi

Thank you for the confidence..

It isn't so I can see the world as rainbows and unicorns...It is so that I can communicate with others who are still at that level without feeling like a huge hypocrite because I "know different" and this is what I struggle with on a daily basis..when "as it truly is" STILL comes across to another as "how you perceive it to be" simply because they are unable to see it that way and there's absolutely nothing I can do about that but not talk to a living soul because they are "not ready to understand it yet" and talking about the weather, Sports, land values, the royal wedding and what was eaten for lunch bores me to tears.

I know what you mean, and I am aware how tempting it may be at times to spout out how you feel about society and the world when being around other people. But trust me, it's not worth the time and energy because they'll never understand anyway. They always compare their own life with the lives of others. For this reason, as surprising as it may be, in real life I would rarely if never say the same things I have said on this forum. I have kinda learned to adapt and blend in with the people I occasionally hang around with while keeping everything to myself most of the time, except when someone really provokes me, but that doesn't happen a lot. Also, keep in mind that there's nothing hypocritical about this. You aren't forced to think highly of others who are less advanced than you. Most of the time such people willingly choose to be 'stuck' in their own delusion without thinking out of the box anyway.

[captainamerica]

Originally Posted by Shivani Devi

Thanks my dear...and yup, I DID give comment tonight about all of those "fake Aghoris" in the Hindu forum.

You are indeed privileged to have these beings at your disposal, when I am limited to my "soul family" in the Astral..

Not that this is necessarily a bad thing, but I tend to come back down into 3D reality with a crashing, soul numbing thud...and the more times I get healed by my "ancestral Aghori tribe" the more difficult it becomes to try to assimilate in the world of monkeys, just to eke out an existence here.

I appreciate your friendship and I am also yours...and I guess that it "takes a Hindu to know a Hindu" and I really should be looking into associating more with "my own kind" to balance this out.

The anxiety attacks only happen when another imposes themselves upon my privacy without understanding anything...or gets in my way just for fun when I am actually trying to make a go of something.

If you do have the opportunity to come to India do let me know,I would love to meet you.

Ok ,please let me know your full name (real), via a PM if you do not want to reveal it publicly.No other detail is needed.

If you can tell me your real name then I'll ask my babaji in my village (his name is Siddh Babaji) for insights regarding your problems ,why you are feeling it ,for how much more time it will last and I will also ask him to remotely heal you as he has healed me in the past before,you won't be needing to meet him but since you are a good and spiritual person maybe he will come to meet you in your dream once or twice like he met me before.His future predictions are almost always detailed and always right until and unless a higher will (such as that of Shiv ji) interferes.

Only your name is needed,nothing else is needed.

Please let me know if I could be of your help this way ,my babaji loves to heal other people whenever he can.

I understand if you do not like my suggestion for some reason

[anthony c]

hi Shivani Devi

The Good news is there is not something wrong with you other than the normal issues and fears we all have. There is something right with you and more specific you are doing something right in meditation.

What you are going through is normal but is a very tough way of healing. Your meditation practice is letting issues and stuff arising from your subconscious and your past and it's trying to tell you something. When you see issues with the world or other people it really is a reflection, like your looking in a mirror and seeing your own issues.

Like i said it's normal for this to happen if someone is practicing meditation and this has happened to me many times. You got to figure out what your subconscious mind is trying to tell you like what the issues is for example and if it is caused by someone who betrayed you, stabbed you in the back or if something happened in your past with money, a relationship with girlfriend/boyfriend that stabbed you in the back or betrayed you. Something like that.

When you figured this out you have to forgive yourself and the one that done this to you and the issue will go a way. Unconditional love and love is how to heal these issues.

It's how these things work unfortunately, it's does not always feel good and it can persist till you worked these stuff out and if you suppress these issues they will just come up another time.

Hope this helps
Good luck!!!

[NoOne]

Originally Posted by Shivani Devi

I am a walking conundrum...A spiritual person who has an intense hatred and loathing for everyone and everything. The gross vibrations on this Earth-plane are making me physically and mentally ill and I don't know what to do about that.

I do meditation and that works only because I do it in isolation and by myself...but as soon as I go out and see all of the emotional manipulation to get gullible people to part with their money..when I see "in your face" greed, when I experience dishonesty to obtain access to personal and private information, when ignorant people try and "show me up" through disagreement without presenting a conflicting argument, when people scramble over each other to get the best life has to offer...everything I have gained in meditation and prayer goes totally out the window...I start getting anxiety attacks, I start getting physically ill and then all of the negative thoughts come about as how I wish this world would end very quickly because all of this scum does not deserve to live.

What is happening to me and is there any way it can be cured or reversed? Thank you.

Hi Shivani,

I have been reading through some of your posts (my God, there are a lot of them, haha )

I get your problem, I think we all go through something like that at some point in our lives.

It seems to me you are in need of some sort of spiritual breakthrough.

My question is this: Have you ever received Shaktipat from an authentic Guru?

If not, I could maybe arrange one from the same source I got it from.

I’d have to ask though.

I am in contact with an earlier incarnation of Durga Devi, who gave me Shaktipat and saved my life in the process. She is a pure manifestation of Shakti, one of the earliest ones on this planet.

Your screen name alone would indicate that this is perhaps what you seek.
Let me know if you’re interested and I’ll see if I can arrange it.

[Shivani Devi]

Originally Posted by NoOne

Hi Shivani,

I have been reading through some of your posts (my God, there are a lot of them, haha )

I get your problem, I think we all go through something like that at some point in our lives.

It seems to me you are in need of some sort of spiritual breakthrough.

My question is this: Have you ever received Shaktipat from an authentic Guru?

If not, I could maybe arrange one from the same source I got it from.

I’d have to ask though.

I am in contact with an earlier incarnation of Durga Devi, who gave me Shaktipat and saved my life in the process. She is a pure manifestation of Shakti, one of the earliest ones on this planet.

Your screen name alone would indicate that this is perhaps what you seek.
Let me know if you’re interested and I’ll see if I can arrange it.

Thank you, sweetheart...I mean absolutely no disrespect to your kind self or your teacher, but finding a Guru is something that I feel I need to do on my own, as I have had many offers of indoctrination over the past few years and others have explained to me how much it has helped them, but I have not yet learned to understand how any of that could relate to my individual case.

Having said that, I am in pure bliss right now and I think I may have accidentally stumbled upon something which just shifted my whole awareness.

Before I sleep, I usually listen to a deep trance hypnosis to place me into a total hypnagogic state, where my subconscious mind is very suggestible to healing energies.

I find the ones by Trigram Healing very effective for this:

https://m.youtube.com/user/TrigramHealing/videos

Anyhow, I was doing the hypnosis session on nerve cell and DNA repair.. really getting into it and the trance became so deep, I couldn't come back out of it when he counted to ten...I figured I would just naturally go to sleep and just sleep the trance state off...but my subconscious mind was WIDE open..

It just so happened that I was playing this hypnosis session directly from my YouTube playlist and I had the list on "shuffle" and the thing that came up next, having DIRECT access to my subconscious mind, just blew me (and any attachments and associations with an individual persona) totally out of the water:

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=rbOvjBchKkg

I listened to the Nisargadatta Ultimatum Pointers whilst I was in a deep hypnagogic state.... Shaktipat not required. lol

My Consciousness expanded to the ends of the universe and then I became that which gave rise to consciousness..yet there was no I!

What a trip! Suffice to say...
I needed that!

It has been quite a while between drinks..

[LadyMay]

I don't know if this is helpful, but as others have said, I think it's natural to feel this way when you see horrible the world can be.

BUT, I remind myself that to see change I need to start by being the change I want to see. I know it's only little and takes time, but it's the only thing we can do, so I try it to the best of my ability, and try to remember to see the good things no matter how small. It is hard yes, but I have been feeling much more content since I have been trying this.