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18-02-2018, 08:09 PM
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Experiencer
Join Date: Jan 2016
Posts: 296
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What do you think of pin-up tattoos on a man?
I've separated from the father of my son years ago and have been on an online dating site.
So I've met this guy, we talked a bit and then decided to meet for a coffee. I was enjoying the time with him, but then at one point he showed me a tattoo in his forearm of a motorbike piston with a naked pin-up girl with high heels on it.
I was quite shocked, especially when he told me that he's done it only a month ago (he's 47).
I like tattoos and I have 3 myself, but I find this pin-up naked thing very tacky, trashy and also is objectifying women. Purely sexist.
It just put me off him immediately. I mean, how would I even explain to my 6 year old son that kind of thing?
He doesn't have children, so I guess that's not an issue for him.
What do you think about this sort of thing?
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18-02-2018, 09:07 PM
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Experiencer
Join Date: Jan 2018
Location: England
Posts: 268
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Tattoo's are creative art and a very personal thing to some. They can have meaning. I have a half sleeve from elbow to wrist on my forearm, it is not offensive to others, but it has meaning to me.
He obviously got it for a reason and perhaps in his mind he feels it is not offensive? Have you asked him the reason he got it; what it means? I often get that, especially when chatting to ladies
But seriously, it's part of who he is, and if you like who he is - his complete character - then this needs accepting IMO. His tattoo being tacky etc is your opinion, which you're entitled to, but it doesn't mean he on a whole is.
Put it this way. If I met a lady who absolutely blew my socks off and she had a visible tattoo that I deemed offensive - apart from asking her what her reason was for getting it and what it means to her, I'd absolutely not let it be the reason for not continuing dating her.
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18-02-2018, 09:11 PM
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Experiencer
Join Date: Jan 2016
Posts: 296
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Quote:
Originally Posted by OEN34
Tattoo's are creative art and a very personal thing to some. They can have meaning. I have a half sleeve from elbow to wrist on my forearm, it is not offensive to others, but it has meaning to me.
He obviously got it for a reason and perhaps in his mind he feels it is not offensive? Have you asked him the reason he got it; what it means? I often get that, especially when chatting to ladies
But seriously, it's part of who he is, and if you like who he is - his complete character - then this needs accepting IMO. His tattoo being tacky etc is your opinion, which you're entitled to, but it doesn't mean he on a whole is.
Put it this way. If I met a lady who absolutely blew my socks off and she had a visible tattoo that I deemed offensive - apart from asking her what her reason was for getting it and what it means to her, I'd absolutely not let it be the reason for not continuing dating her.
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Thank you.
Yes I did ask him and he said he just likes it. Didn't say any meaning behind it.
I like tattoos too, I've got 3 myself. It was this specific tattoo that made me cringe.
I did like him, after all we were together talking non-stop for 3 and a half hours on our first date! So maybe I am being a bit judgemental and will at least see him for a second date. Will think about it.
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19-02-2018, 08:28 AM
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Experiencer
Join Date: Jan 2018
Location: England
Posts: 268
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Quote:
Originally Posted by olhosdeamendoa
Thank you.
Yes I did ask him and he said he just likes it. Didn't say any meaning behind it.
I like tattoos too, I've got 3 myself. It was this specific tattoo that made me cringe.
I did like him, after all we were together talking non-stop for 3 and a half hours on our first date! So maybe I am being a bit judgemental and will at least see him for a second date. Will think about it.
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That sounds like a good first date!
I imagine you will start to not even notice it is on him the more you see him. It'll just be there, without any thought
Best of luck!
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19-02-2018, 08:38 AM
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If it really bugs you then have no further dealings with him. He's himself. He decided to have the tattoo. It signifies something you don't like and it will always be there unless he has it overwritten.
No point in continuing with someone if you can't resolve in your mind what other connotations the tattoo might also signify. Have you asked yourself why you responded adversely? I mean deeply, beyond the superficial "I don't like that." If you like tattoos - why?
Silly for him to say there's no meaning behind it. Unless he popped in the parlour and said "I want tatooing. Any design will do," he had some impetus to choose this design. As is increasingly well known, most men aren't in touch with their emotions. However, scantily clad girls in high heels are often associated with motor bikes through monotonously repetitive advertising. Something to do with supporting the male libido, But to me he's saying "he likes bikes and he likes to conform".
Freud would have said something about the piston design.
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19-02-2018, 11:16 AM
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Experiencer
Join Date: Jan 2016
Posts: 296
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Quote:
Originally Posted by OEN34
That sounds like a good first date!
I imagine you will start to not even notice it is on him the more you see him. It'll just be there, without any thought
Best of luck!
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Yes it was a good first date. Conversation was easy and flowing between us and I felt comfortable with him. And yes, also felt attracted to him.
It was just when I saw the tat I was like WOOOO!! What the f***? lol
He asked me on a second date right away when we were still together on the first one, so I guess I'll go on a second date with him and see how I feel about him (without considering the tattoo).
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19-02-2018, 01:08 PM
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Deactivated Account
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: ☘️
Posts: 10,271
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We are definitely in a more open minded time right now as far as self expression, so the tattoo really doesn't surprise me. There is a tattoo from a well known Miami artists that I absolutely love, it has a naked female with a fox mask on LOL. It's beautiful art to me. I have no desire to have it, I just like the uniqueness and artistic value and of course anyone that knows me knows I loves foxes...
I do have to say, I feel a big aspect in our choice in art and tattoos is a reflection of our deep subconscious emotions/desires/beliefs. Perhaps, your friend has an 'acquired' taste on women and metal LOL. Who knows! But what I think really doesn't matter. If your having a good time with the person and he is treating you with respect, than that is all that should matter in my opinion. In short, have fun!
Good luck on your second date, keep us updated; I'd be interested to know if the tattoo is in any way a reflection of his character or not. I mean, none of us know, right?! At any case, I believe in giving everyone a fair chance, as we are so much more than the physical
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19-02-2018, 01:38 PM
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Master
Join Date: May 2015
Location: UK
Posts: 1,181
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I have a pin up tattoo on my thigh and I am female, to me it represents empowerment of sexuality <3
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