Difference between infatuation/limerence and a soul connection recognition?

[John Elessar]

Don't worry, this isn't a "Oh your 'soul connections' are all superficial short-lived attractions that are doomed to fade!" type of posts that we occasionally see here.

All I know is that in my case it wasn't an infatuation-I had experienced those with other girls before I met her (one of which I instantly killed within myself one day through sheer force of will after 2 years of only talking to her briefly once).

Not with A. I've mentioned here the instant feeling of familiarity before. We started clicking like mad, and I noticed that, whatever I was feeling, it was based on a deep feeling of peace even as I was strongly drawn and attracted to her anyway. I was always a hopeless nervous wreck around the opposite sex before, but not with her, at all.

Does that kind of thing ring true for you as well?

[marri]

Yes.

And it was not like there were not other relationships before and after him. We went through the usual ups and downs and periods of no contact. During that time, I was searching for that same feeling and experience in someone else. I would always compare them to him or even when I was with them, be thinking of him or in some way. I never ever found another like him. Now, after many years, I know it won't and that is ok.

[july14]

for me, men would fall into very strict categories. no interest of any shape, true friend material with no sexual attraction at all, just sex material, and the danger zone. interestingly, danger zone and friend material would never mix, and also this men-ometer would never fail.

met twin, and I felt the ease and familiarity I'd feel with a life long best friend, a turn on like never before, but without the nerves, and as the OP said, peace. like I had no urge to make myself look better, smarter or prettier than I am.

infatuation gets you all worked up, nervous even, and when the pink glasses fade away, you feel like you've been drooling over a frog lol

[dragoneyes]

hmmmm..
I'm still trying to figure out what my connection is anyway..

but I still get that jittery, nervous and butterfly feeling everytime I see him or even just see his name pop up on my phone if we haven't been speaking for a while

but I also get a sense of deep peace when we're together, but its like a mixture of a deep familiar bond with a giddy one. I'm not sure what i've been experiencing anymore. Infatuation, false twin, real twin, karmic connection.. who knows. I feel like i'm home when i'm with him, but he gives me this super giddy, happy, schoolgirl feeling as well...

I don't know how it could be infatuation still after almost 7 years.

[marri]

We had many many years together so it was not false nor infatuation.

The night we met, he was like no other. We laughed well into the night, finished each others' sentences and it was just bliss. There will never be another night like that.

When I was with him, I felt complete. I felt protected, calm, giddy, happy, like I was in some other universe with just us. But, there were a lot of things that came between us so there was also disappointment, anxiety, loneliness and incredible longing.

Nonetheless, we always came back together. We weathered every storm, always.

The three years before he passed were the toughest. He was angry, mean and sullen. But I stayed. I always stayed. Finally, he understood that I wouldn't abandon him.

About five months before he died, we went out to eat. He was very ill. When I went to pick him up, he could barely walk but he wanted to go. Within about 45 minutes, his energy lifted and he was feeling much better. We did that for each other. No, it was not vampiric. It was just that we needed each other.

Two nights before he died, I had to be away. I dreamed and dreamed and dreamed about him nonstop. He asked me to make a commitment to him. I hesitated only a second, actually I was going to say yes and thinking about how I could do that, the logistics. Then, suddenly, he was gone. Silence. I never had a dream again about him until a while after he had passed. Was it real or was it just a symbol of our relationship almost, almost almost going to finally say yes, and then.....we waited too long.

Now that he is gone, I do not feel whole. I still talk to him sometimes, sometimes I get mad, mostly I am sad and so wish he was here and most of the time I wonder how I will ever do without him. I always felt like Rose and Jack best captured our love- crazy, insane and takes us on different paths, but one that will last forever. I don't know what happens after death, but I can only hope that my love will be there for me at the top of a staircase, just like Jack was.

So, I do not think there is any litmus test or criteria to use to determine if it is a "real" tf other than time. If you laugh with your tf at 2 am in the middle of a storm, if get infuriated with each other but fear separation more than anything and always come back, then I would say that is probably a true tf.

[dragoneyes]

I'm so sorry to hear about your loss. I don't know what I would do. I worry about my twin everyday right now as he is going through what seems to be depression - also very angry, sullen and mean.
That's a wonderful story though, you can always live back through your memories and be thankful that you had that amazing love :)
not many people get to experience it.
All you can do is continue to talk to him the best you can , and trust that you will see each other again one day and it will be beautiful.
stay strong.

I love my twin more than I could ever love anything in this entire world.
i guess whatever it is it's special :) that's the only guideline I need right now

[LadyMay]

The peace comes because it's a heart connection, the infatuation comes from the sacral chakra where emotional attachment speaks loudest. When you're connected to your heart you just feel calm and contentedness, which is what you experience with a soulmate or twin-connection (after all the emotional purging).

[vis-à-vis]

Here’s one, it’s only hard to know what it really is when you're trying to know what it really is instead of accepting what it really is.. The experience only confuses when we're not actually living it, instead we’re processing it to the point of it being a completely different involvement. At the base, everything is love, right or wrong? Depending on your answer, possibly with timing as a filter, the symptoms of the experience will be felt or channelled into different areas of life needing the certain attention to wake up. The stronger the connection is felt on all levels, the stronger you are forced into further healing of yourself, unless of course you are already fully healed and will no longer need to conduit the love, you have already become. So however or by whomever you are given these reminders, being in peace or being a cleanser to rid yourself of the blocks which are keeping you from living in peace. Fundamentally the same thing which teaches, is the same thing you learn.