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Go Back   Spiritual Forums > Spirituality & Beliefs > Affirmations > Manifesting, Creating, & The Law of Attraction

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  #1  
Old 20-10-2010, 06:49 AM
White Wolf
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Question Asking for a specific person.

Firstly, I'm not sure if this belongs here or in the relationship discussion - but here seems the most appropriate.

In a nutshell, I'm 46, have been engaged, but never married - and earlier this year I finally admitted to myself that I do want to be married. (I'm also in a complicated situation with a lovely man, whom I fell in love with despite my best efforts not to...)

For several months, I have been working with the LoA to bring the right man [read: future husband] into my life, and even though I have met some delightful, interesting gentlemen, none of them compare to my current friend.

Yesterday, I finally decided to just "give in" and ask specifically for the relationship I have to blossom - providing it is right for both of us. At first, I felt very uncomfortable with my request, as in the past I have only asked for a specific thing if it was clothes, or jewelry, or a trip to a particular location / country, or a home in a certain area, etc. Asking for a specific human being seemed to be interfering with that person's rights.

That being said, when I woke up this morning, I felt a level of peace re: that relationship that I've never felt before. I'm not assuming we'll get a "happily ever after" scenario, but something has altered for the better. (I haven't actually spoken with him since I asked, so I have no idea if he's feeling any different toward me.)

Has anyone else had that type of experience? Did you end up with the person you asked for?

Normally if I ask for something, and it's just not for me, I get a very strong feeling, very quickly, and let the desire for whatever it is go. But this is the exact opposite; it feels so right! It's frightening me a little, and I'm not sure how to deal with these feelings.

Any thoughts / advice would be deeply appreciated.

White Wolf
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  #2  
Old 20-10-2010, 07:17 AM
Falling Star Falling Star is offline
Ascender
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: Eastbourne England
Posts: 666
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Sometimes we are given reassurance by guides in our sleepstates, we may not remember this but we wake with the feeling inside. As you described a sense of peace within.
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*ONLY LOVE IS REAL*

*We find the path of wisdom....along the trail of tears*

*Your vision will become clear only when YOU look into YOUR heart. who looks outside, dreams. Who looks inside AWAKENS*- Carl Jung
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  #3  
Old 20-10-2010, 07:21 AM
White Wolf
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Falling Star,

That makes a lot of sense. Thank you.

White Wolf
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  #4  
Old 20-10-2010, 07:32 AM
Falling Star Falling Star is offline
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Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: Eastbourne England
Posts: 666
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You are welcome......You know we must always believe that within love....all things are possible!

When we wish to manifest from a place of love within.......most prayers or requests from the heart are always granted.

I wish you love and light WhiteWolf.

Is the White wolf one of your totem animals? it is one of mine, and i feel it to be sacred and pure.
__________________
*ONLY LOVE IS REAL*

*We find the path of wisdom....along the trail of tears*

*Your vision will become clear only when YOU look into YOUR heart. who looks outside, dreams. Who looks inside AWAKENS*- Carl Jung
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  #5  
Old 20-10-2010, 07:36 AM
White Wolf
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Thank you.

And yes, my totem animal is a large, snow white, female wolf.

White Wolf
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  #6  
Old 20-10-2010, 07:43 AM
JEN
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Hi Whitewolf. What a lovely dilema you have placed yourself in!! Life is interesting isnt it?

I understand your situation pretty well, actually, and do concur with your concern for asking for someone spacifically in case it takes from their free will, but I just dont think that can happen. You didnt put a spell on him did you?? I am guessing no - not an integral thing to do..... and I think you have heaps of integrity.

It may be as simple as the fact that you have made up your mind to take this relationship to full commitment, and it is YOUR perspective that has changed - thereby changing the dynamic of the whole relationship. I cant comment on this because I dont know what the previous situation was. Just food for thought.

However, taking the view that this guy is the one with the commitment phobia, I doubt you will be able to influence him in anyway that he doesnt want to be influenced!! and good luck to you, my love.

Just as an aside, I would also have to ask, (if he has never shown an inkling of commitment to a formal relationship), what payoff his non-commitment has played in your life. There is always a payoff..... ie, what belief in yourself does this situation reinforce, what does a non-committed relationship allow you, or allow you to be, etc. (I am sure you know the type of things I mean!!). Just food for thought.

From your posts I have read (which I enjoyed BTW), I get the impression that you are a very mature well balanced person who is pretty skilled in manifesting.... but I will ask you one question. Have you worked out WHAT marriage will provide you with, and when you did your manifesting list (or whatever you do), did you articulate these aspects and feeling It has been my experience that doing it this way, (the less prescriptive end result if you will), allows the universe/you to provide the necessary end result in as a creative way as it/you like. I mean just asking for 'marriage partner' might result in a quick wedding and even quicker divorce..... heaven forbid!

I am now 57, long time divorced and been on my own 27 years (with now 2 grown kids). I cant say I have truly had a successful relationship throughout that time....lots of fun and a few marriage proposals have come my way.... but poor loves just didnt cut it - compared to a life of freedom and no compromises.... SO I am really the last person to give advice on marriage. BUT I will say one thing: "dont tell him about it" - that would truly be an act of sabatage!!

I wish you the very best
JEN

Last edited by JEN : 20-10-2010 at 07:48 AM.
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  #7  
Old 20-10-2010, 09:47 AM
White Wolf
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Hi JEN,

Oh good heavens, no, I didn't put a spell on him. I simply revoked my previous request for "my perfect partner" and asked specifically for my friend by name, as long as it is right for both of us. (I really emphasized that last bit.)

As for the payoff I'm getting ... hmmm ... I'll need to think that one through carefully, but my first reaction was that it plays into my belief that "I don't deserve..." (Love. Happiness. Companionship.)

Thank you for saying I seem mature and well-balanced. And the "quick wedding - quicker divorce" scenario didn't even occur to me! Yikes.

It's good to know you are enjoying your freedom.

And don't worry, I'd never tell him I "asked" for him. LOL

White Wolf
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  #8  
Old 20-10-2010, 05:10 PM
LightFilledHeart
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Quote:
Originally Posted by White Wolf
Hi JEN,

Oh good heavens, no, I didn't put a spell on him. I simply revoked my previous request for "my perfect partner" and asked specifically for my friend by name, as long as it is right for both of us. (I really emphasized that last bit.)


White Wolf

Hi White Wolf my friend

I think you took a safe way to place your request. I always add the caveat "..with the good of all concerned and harm to none", which is similar.

In my years as a spiritual counselor, I used to tell people who came to me for advice on love and relationship this:

"Ask for your perfect right mate. Don't ask for Joe or Tom
or Phil... ask for your perfect right mate! You can't be unhappy with perfect and right"

The reason I said that was that we often want a certain person we have strong feelings for and think will make us happy, but who in truth will not. If we ask specifically for that person, we will likely get what we ask for, but it may not end up giving us the happiness we desire, whereas perfect and right is... well... perfect! And right!

I also believe, though, that sometimes we are strongly drawn to another individual because we have karma to work out with them. If that were to be the case, then pairing up with that person is exactly the right thing to do, even if it DOESN'T bring us the peace and joy we seek. Does that make sense??

Relationships are just so complicated, aren't they?? I believe their true purpose ... contrary to what WE think we are entering into them for!... is to teach and grow us, and as we all know, learning and growing can at times be a painful process

You are a beautiful light in this world, and what I wish for you above all else is fulfillment of your heart's desire... whatever that may be!

Love, light & blessings...

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  #9  
Old 21-10-2010, 04:14 AM
White Wolf
Posts: n/a
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by LightFilledHeart
Hi White Wolf my friend

I think you took a safe way to place your request. I always add the caveat "..with the good of all concerned and harm to none", which is similar.

In my years as a spiritual counselor, I used to tell people who came to me for advice on love and relationship this:

"Ask for your perfect right mate. Don't ask for Joe or Tom
or Phil... ask for your perfect right mate! You can't be unhappy with perfect and right"

The reason I said that was that we often want a certain person we have strong feelings for and think will make us happy, but who in truth will not. If we ask specifically for that person, we will likely get what we ask for, but it may not end up giving us the happiness we desire, whereas perfect and right is... well... perfect! And right!

I also believe, though, that sometimes we are strongly drawn to another individual because we have karma to work out with them. If that were to be the case, then pairing up with that person is exactly the right thing to do, even if it DOESN'T bring us the peace and joy we seek. Does that make sense??

Relationships are just so complicated, aren't they?? I believe their true purpose ... contrary to what WE think we are entering into them for!... is to teach and grow us, and as we all know, learning and growing can at times be a painful process

You are a beautiful light in this world, and what I wish for you above all else is fulfillment of your heart's desire... whatever that may be!

Love, light & blessings...

Hello LightFilledHeart

This is the first time in my entire life that I've asked for a specific person - and that in itself has left me reeling. I can't explain to myself - let alone anyone else - why I took such a step.

I asked for my "perfect partner" and within a few days (after an odd series of events) met the gentleman who is now my friend.

*ahem* Yes folks, sometimes I am seriously slow on the uptake. LOL Reading what I just wrote, light dawned. Maybe I just can't see the wood for the trees? I assumed that after meeting "the one" everything would magically fall into place - but maybe not.

Anyway, yes, LightFilledHeart, what you wrote about a necessary relationship not automatically being happy or peaceful does make sense. And thank you for your very kind wishes.

White Wolf
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  #10  
Old 21-10-2010, 06:31 AM
pre-dawn
Posts: n/a
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by White Wolf
In a nutshell, I'm 46, have been engaged, but never married - and earlier this year I finally admitted to myself that I do want to be married. (I'm also in a complicated situation with a lovely man, whom I fell in love with despite my best efforts not to...)
I really don't get this. There are thousands of woman who would be happy to be in that situation. Is being married really more important than a good relationship?
Quote:
For several months, I have been working with the LoA to bring the right man [read: future husband] into my life, and even though I have met some delightful, interesting gentlemen, none of them compare to my current friend.
.. and still you go on looking for someone else. This is not a good way to nurture what you have now.
Quote:

Yesterday, I finally decided to just "give in" and ask specifically for the relationship I have to blossom - providing it is right for both of us. At first, I felt very uncomfortable with my request, as in the past I have only asked for a specific thing if it was clothes, or jewelry, or a trip to a particular location / country, or a home in a certain area, etc. Asking for a specific human being seemed to be interfering with that person's rights.
One could rephrase this, I ask for A, but only if xyz. Are you aware that a 'but' negates everything that was said before, meaning that you don't really ask for A?

We men may be insensitive and sometimes stupid, but even in that state we pick up when something is not quite right. You may well up end with no one at all.

If you are seriously looking for someone else then untangle yourself from your current relationship first. If you don't want to do that then forget about others. To use the LoA while playing 'safe' is deceptive and the LoA will not work under such conditions or will return deception back to you.
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