Why is so difficult? My Heart understands but my Mind and Body miss him.

[Tiss]

Dear Toolite and Dezzymandius,

Your words are very healing. Thanks!

Much love to you,

TISS

Best wishes much Love, Light and Life.
Glory To God

I do feel so very much sympathy for you Tiss, I was told, or possibly read,

They are never truly gone while we keep them in here.

[Tiss]

Neville!

[Tobi]

Originally Posted by Tiss

I know that he is still with me, in many ways, now that he passed 2 years ago.

My heart knows that, I still feel all that wonderful feelings of our unconditional love, with the same strength. I am still deeply in love with him. It is amazing, and I have said this here before, I love him as the young and powerful man he was when we met for the first time, but also, I love him as the helpless but dignified man he was when he passed after his illness. I love him at all his ages and in all different situations...

But I still miss him so deeply, so breathlessly, so painfully that sometimes I believe that I will not resist. I still miss every detail of our time together, his hand in my hand, his loving embrace, his sweet words, his physical protection. When I recall our moments together I feel again all the physical sensations of love...

My body misses him, my mind plays tricks with me. If all about spiritual world and re-encounters were false?

I am now 2: the one who understands that he is always with me, and the one who misses him so much.

I cannot complain, I have a good life...with much peace, with much light, nice operative achievements, but with the only hope to join him again, to be one again. I would say, peace, no despair, but no fun.

Why is so difficult?

Thanks friends for reading,

TISS

Oh Tiss, I understand, I really do.
They still live, but they have gone from our everyday dimension in the physical sense that they were once with us.
Of course we miss them. Missing them in that way is painful sometimes.
All the things we did, the things we shared, the ordinary blessings of life together well-lived, have been taken away. Missing these things, and these dear ones hurts. It just does.
They may be happy, content, in spiritual life, but they are in another place -another dimension!

Sometimes it's easier. Such as when we feel their Souls occasionally draw near us. To me, it's as if my loved one never ever went anywhere, when that happens. The joy of the experience lights up everything, and at moments like that I realize -this is the Soul I love, and have always loved, with nothing missing at all. This was the same Soul who indwelt in that body I had got so familiar with. This is now that exact same Soul, but now wearing less "clothing" I think the message they try to convey with these visits, however space and time might make us feel separated -is that their hearts never really went anywhere, and that love is never forgotten.

But in my case when my loved one has to withdraw again to that natural new dimension, and I am still here, then I feel I miss that Soul again. I have found out that if I can attune my heart to them, I can send out my love, and the separation-gap narrows again. They truly understand our grieving, but hope that we can learn to relate to them in Soul for that short time we -the ones let behind -have yet to complete on our sacred journey on Earth.

But of course we miss them here with us. But hold on to the love. You will be re-united so long as there is love.
Re-encounters, whether they occur while you are in the body, and they are in the Soul, or whether they are encountered on the other side, are not false, so long as they truly sound the "note" or feeling/sense of that loved one's Soul pattern, which you are familiar with. Do trust in that.

[Tiss]

Dear all,

I was doubtful about opening this thread but now I think that it was a very good idea. I am recovering my perspective after reading your posts.

Tobi , thanks for sharing your wisdom and empathy, they are very helpful.

With gratitude,

TISS

You're welcome Tiss. I remember needing to talk about my feelings so much these first few years. I still like to talk about him.

He will stay with you until you are strong enough to let him go. He needs to adjust and move on as well, and he will when you are ready to let go. Time truly is a great healer. Do you have a journal you can write in? It was suggested to me and I wrote in it every day...even if it was one word that described my feelings. I did this for years, then I stopped. Looking back I can now see that was the first step in letting go....the last step, as I said earlier, was after 5 years. Around that time I had a dream about him and he was sitting in his favorite car looking so drawn and haggered. I felt bad and said "you can go, it's okay". The next dream I had (this is how he came to me over those 5 years and I used to wait for those dreams because I missed him so much), he was standing in a sunny field and he was all aglow with gold suit and his hair was so golden and I couldn't understand what that meant...there was a cat crossing in this field too. I changed after that...and came to the conclusion it was a sign he was happy and moved on to a higher plane of existence and he rarely comes to me in a dream....when he does it is in times of hardship and I need comforting.

Funny thing about love....I have found that it's all the same. The love for your mother, brother, pet, husband....a stranger on the street.....it's all the same. It's an act of kindness towards others. It's all there is and it's all the same. Love is Love. I think when that is understood you can let the people and things you love go. Because letting go is really just acceptance.

[Tobi]

We definitely have to have the grace to set them free, and trust that. We have to know that they are following their spiritual journey -which they will.
But while our true love will set them free, we don't have to "let them go" in the sense of moving completely away from them and waving farewell.(unless we want to, and they want us to. This can depend on many factors, including the nature of the relationship.

Souls on the other side continue to learn, to grow, and to raise their vibrations.
Doing this can sometimes make them feel "further away". People often say "He/she was around a lot at first, then went further, deeper, in to the Spiritual dimensions, and now they don't visit any more...."

But sometimes it's not that way at all. Their love is still there, it just becomes finer, and especially if they go to very "high" levels -although we will still recognize their energy, and their Soul pattern, it will be changed slightly, and may seem more "distant". The love will be finer, purer. Sometimes it can be harder to sense this level of contact. People left behind here on Earth are likely to feel that the beloved Soul just left...."disappeared into the Light".....but the reality can be that the beloved Soul's contacts are much finer, and harder to sense, especially for people who lead busy lives with a lot of distractions. The earlier contacts can be easier because their Soul still has a certain "solidity" about it, but as the journey for them progresses, they become finer.

But they will still be contactable, especially if love is sent to them, it will not in any way harm them, hinder their development, make them "earthbound" etc, and cannot drag them back or down in any way. Love cannot hurt any Soul, cannot hinder it or damage it, so long as it is pure love, has no agenda, no weights of suffering, no demands, and no negative 'clinging' vibrations. The relationship can continue in the spirit of love. And that relationship can continue throughout the whole life of the person living on Earth. They can -and often still want to -continue to commune with us at times, and not just because we are very low or down. But simply because there is love.

But if you are attuned to the changing nature of the beloved Soul's vibrations, and able to meet them half-way spiritually, then it's easy to tell if they are around or not. I they are, you will receive a "reply". If they are not, at that time, you won't sense them. But still send the love. Send them love as often as you like. Just send it out as a blessing, then let go of it and let it rise. Part of you will also rise with it and gain a new perspective outside of the grieving energies.
Thus there are many times they can still visit. And us going "half-way" spiritually, will make their visits to us much easier for them.

Sometimes a deceased loved one can be one of your Spiritual Guides. And will not leave you until you are ready to learn things in different ways with other Guides. Or may never leave you in this work! That depends on what you need to learn. It can be they will move aside to allow you to grow in ways that only someone else can help you with.
Go with the flow. If you sense them, thank them, and even ask them what their Soul purpose is? And what they would like? Ask them to show you so you are clear.
You may hear their answer telepathically, in intuition, or in dreams.

[Tiss]

Blessings Sslama for your advise. I am writing from time to time and makes me feel better, I began the day he passed every day, and now not so often, but it has been very healing.

But they will still be contactable, especially if love is sent to them, it will not in any way harm them, hinder their development, make them "earthbound" etc, and cannot drag them back or down in any way. Love cannot hurt any Soul, cannot hinder it or damage it, so long as it is pure love, has no agenda, no weights of suffering, no demands, and no negative 'clinging' vibrations. The relationship can continue in the spirit of love. And that relationship can continue throughout the whole life of the person living on Earth. They can -and often still want to -continue to commune with us at times, and not just because we are very low or down. But simply because there is love.

Tobi, it's great that you mentioned this, as many point out that if you do not let them go you are damaging them. It would be the last I would want for him, but I also believe that love cannot hurt any soul.

Thanks for taking time to write so helpful words.

Much love,
TISS

[Tobi]

True love without any selfish agenda (except to share in true love) does not hurt any Soul.

But we must also remember that they have their own journey to make and a new way of Being to adjust to on the inner planes. I feel it would be wrong to "call them down" to our level (or rather the level just beyond the Earth Plane)continually, as doing this could be damaging for them.

But to send love is a blessing to them. And wait on Grace for times they may be able to visit us. And to be happy and thankful if and when they do.

"Raising" one's own vibrations to meet them on a finer level would be a very creative thing to do. One doesn't need to go out of body or anything to do that, it's a state of Heart. Doing that would do them nothing but good, for it would set them free from any possible grieving they might be feeling for us, and help them not to worry.
Sometimes the ones who have passed on, especially if there's a strong bond in love, are very concerned about us, would want us to know they are OK, would want us to know they still love us, but also to respect and understand what they now have to learn and progress with. Also it takes quite a bit of energy to come down to lower levels, and they often have to go away again to re-charge.
If they feel duty-bound to hang around by our "calling them to us", if we are in dark grieving, and unable to raise vibrations, they can get too enmeshed with lower levels, and also drained of energy.
But love never hurts.