Destiny Retrieval

[Shivani Devi]

Originally Posted by H:O:R:A:C:E

Yoda was a leader, but the force ["an energy field created by all living
things, it surrounds us, it penetrates us"] which gave him life isn't a being.

Until I realised that saying what the Force cannot be, was limiting the power of the Force (i.e God is omnipotent and omnipresent so there is no negation of being).

Formless can assume form and the space of 'nothing' can give rise to 'something'. This is where Shiva dwells.

It was Ramakrishna who said "I want to taste the sugar and not be the sugar"...and then later, he asked for a sword from his Guru to kill goddess Kali (because the goddess was getting in the way of him achieving total enlightenment).

I have been offered the Sword a few times and I have refused to take it...and thus I must suffer the trials of Christ.

[Shivani Devi]

Originally Posted by H:O:R:A:C:E

this addresses your question:

through my personal observations, i've determined that to have a body requires that you do something.
[it's logically impossible to exist in a state of non-doing... "if you choose not to decide, you still have made a choice".]

Oh yes, the decision of indecision...acting by omission....I'm a past master.

We don't really have any control over anything at all, do we? we only think we can make things go our way, but they don't.

...and Shiva just chimed in with "the lesson here, is to think about things 'going your way' with as much faith and devotion as you think about Me and they will".

So, now I understand it and I have a direct connection with the Divine which is totally awesome, beautiful, amazing and whatever other adjective there is...I shouldn'[t lament my life.

AUM NAMAH SHIVAYA

[SerpentSun]

Originally Posted by The Necromancer

I have that one all figured out, my friend.

People call other people 'selfish' when their own selfish needs are not being met and they use the term to elicit a guilt response to get their own needs met.

Hence the reason why you experience the emotions you do, it is a 'human trick' and they learn these very early in life.

I saw through all the bull**** as soon as I was old enough to walk and talk - I was dangerous, so everybody just avoided me and I became a loner...I can also talk to the spirit world and recognise them by energy signatures.

I tend to ignore them mostly now because I kinda said "cut the bull and take me to your leader" and they eventually did (I went through a lot of "leaders" though) LOL

This is why Shiva is called Maha Deva. Devas are the 'shining ones' they are all the Angels...and Maha means "Great" so Shiva is the 'Great Angel' and in my books, that's close enough for a 'God"....raising vibrations way over the top.

Oh all these synchronicities with the numbers....

Haha life can sure be a head trip.

When I was younger, I thought I could see through all the lies and tricks of this world. And I did indeed see a lot for my age. But year after year, I'd have these "mini-epiphanies"; like my already-opened eyes were being further pried open. The layers of understanding seem to be like an onion.

And like an onion, understanding can both lend flavor and nourishment as well as make the eyes burn and water. Sometimes I just want to be "normal"....See what others see, want what they want, understand their humor and their memes....But then I feel like it's all an awful screenplay that I simply don't want to be a part of.

I just want the feeling of being part of something.

I'm like half-asleep rambling right now, but I'm too happy to get offline and face my nightmares. Sleep will come when I die. Speaking of nightmares, my mom and I even fight in my dreams, although our real fights are never so bad. She is the main person who calls me selfish though, which is why I assume everyone else thinks I am. Lies are easier to believe when mommy says so.

I still love her though.

No passing out without love!

[Shivani Devi]

Originally Posted by SerpentSun

No passing out without love!

Yep, pretty much. lol

[dryad]

That could be part of the problem...If you were talking to dark spirits and you asked them to take you to their leader you might have got a dark aspect of Shiva (or equivalent). It's not always easy to tell the difference between dark and light.

You could probably do with a little more taoism in the mix. The human TV stuff is a result of going too far towards oneness and losing sight of the balance with manifested reality. Tao helps to bring that back into balance. You wouldnt even need to let go of Hinduism since you seem to have a balanced perspective on it... just don't hold on so tight.

I wouldnt call myself a shaman but if you want to start with chakra balancing and general healing I can do that for you. Astral energy retrieval is simple enough on the aura level and a lot of the time souls can heal themselves without needing the soul retrieval too. Just depends on the damage.

[Shivani Devi]

Originally Posted by dryad

That could be part of the problem...If you were talking to dark spirits and you asked them to take you to their leader you might have got a dark aspect of Shiva (or equivalent). It's not always easy to tell the difference between dark and light.

You could probably do with a little more taoism in the mix. The human TV stuff is a result of going too far towards oneness and losing sight of the balance with manifested reality. Tao helps to bring that back into balance. You wouldnt even need to let go of Hinduism since you seem to have a balanced perspective on it... just don't hold on so tight.

I wouldnt call myself a shaman but if you want to start with chakra balancing and general healing I can do that for you. Astral energy retrieval is simple enough on the aura level and a lot of the time souls can heal themselves without needing the soul retrieval too. Just depends on the damage.

Even if it was "Dark Shiva" or a spirit tricking me or whatever, the love that I felt, that was for Shiva (so it would have been pointless) - the whole 'Shiva thing' I had grown up with all my life, through the Vedas and the Shiva Puranas and the Shiva Samhita and countless works I read in original Sanskrit. I can recognise.

I knew Shiva through the Vedas as 'Maha Rudra' and I am already familiar with all of Shiva's dark forms, I even worship one of them...called Rudra/Bhairava/Veerbhadra.

Just because this is a 'dark aspect' of Lord Shiva, it doesn't mean it is seen as an 'evil' one. 'Dark Shiva' is only bad and evil to bad and evil men when He punishes them.

Shiva is called "Maha Deva" - the Great Angel and also Bhuteshwara - the Lord of the Demons.

So, it wasn't like I was going into this not knowing what I was doing, and the fact I saw people mutilate and mortify the flesh in His name made it oh so sweeter...

There's a lot to this, but it's all in my past, you are right....the shamans...the elders....the rituals...the training....it was all in my past.

[SerpentSun]

Originally Posted by The Necromancer

Yep, pretty much. lol

My Nintendo DS died, and now I'm online with my phone that has no paragraph spacing, so I think that's a sign it might be bedtime haha. I may or may not elucidate on my incoherent points in the morning. Glad something I said seemed to help though, that's a good thought to end the day on! :)

[Shivani Devi]

Originally Posted by dryad

I wouldnt call myself a shaman but if you want to start with chakra balancing and general healing I can do that for you. Astral energy retrieval is simple enough on the aura level and a lot of the time souls can heal themselves without needing the soul retrieval too. Just depends on the damage.

Oh yes please and I appreciate this. Thank you so much.

[dryad]

Well I agree that dark isn't always evil.... but if you want out of the dark the first thing you gotta do is let go of any dark shiva aspects your still attached to. Find him again in the light.

[Shivani Devi]

Originally Posted by dryad

Well I agree that dark isn't always evil.... but if you want out of the dark the first thing you gotta do is let go of any dark shiva aspects your still attached to. Find him again in the light.

*taken from a post I just made in the Hindu forums:

Ah well, back to talking about Shiva...and all I am becoming aware of now is to get this Shiva love to exist more in my life and not only when I turn my mind to it...or meditate...or focus on/feel Shiva, I need to turn my mind to it...meditate on and focus/feel Shiva more than I do.

At the moment, I meditate/pray for half an hour in the morning and half an hour in the evening....and wonder why I only go into Shiva bliss for half an hour in the morning and half an hour in the evening and for the rest of the day, I come back down to earth and I am grumpy, moody, irritable, lonely, bored, negative and I start acting out.

People say to me, how can you be like you are if you love Shiva so much? Can't you carry that Shiva love into everyday awareness? to do that, I must make it a part of my everyday awareness...

It seems like I have separated my 'spiritual life' from my 'physical life' and now the two are at loggerheads. I would like to know how to incorporate my love for Shiva into everyday existence and not just when I am peaceful, relaxed and in the mood to just let myself feel it.

So, this has been my problem all along...I need a constant reminder of this and I have tried wearing rudraksha, an 'om ring'....but I need to be reminded I am wearing all that too, to be reminded of Shiva love.

I guess I just need to do even more sadhana than I am doing...one hour a day isn't enough to be able to remember and exist in that state for the other 23 hours...when I am not sleeping or even in my sleep...I'd love to actually dream about Shiva, but funnily enough, I never have.

It's a process that needs to become 'automatic' and not manual...I need to drive the automatic version of the Shiva bliss-mobile.

...and ignoring Shiva's 'Dark Aspects' isn't going to help me....if anything it will only hinder me, as I worship and love Shiva holistically....both light and dark aspects...both Maha Deva (Great Angel) and Bhuteshwara (Demon Lord)...I couldn't love or worship Shiva any other way because my love is unconditional.

No, I just have to increase the amount of time I spend in fond remembrance of the Lord in any aspect and not only love Shiva, but be true to that love within myself...and although I love Shiva, trust is another issue entirely because sometimes I go to sleep at night wondering if I am going to wake up the next day when my breathing slows right down to about 2-3 breaths/minute and I feel like I am falling backwards into oblivion.

Another problem being that I have raised my energies (kundalini) improperly...it was an orchestrated and arranged 'accident' and it occurred as I was studying the floor-plan of the Borobudur temple in Java a few months ago...then all my lives came flashing before me, all in the space of about 5 minutes...

So, this is what is going on with me and why I can never seem to find 'spiritual closure' with this - because the past keeps on influencing the present...

Aum Namah Shivaya