Unconditional love and the practicalities of life

[Tanemon]

I'm posting this because, like many or most people on this forum, I've experienced states of unconditional love. And like most, I've had to make my way in the world and navigate through situations and individuals or groups of people who could hinder or harm me or my loved ones (family, female partner, child).

My mother used to teach us that we should "look for the good in people" - pretty similar to what Sourcerer has included as his 'signture' (quoting Babaji): "Recognize God and goodness in every face."

In life, most of us will encounter people who - because of their needs or personal drives - may exploit us, steal from us, blame things on us (that we didn't do), and so on. The outcome of my meditation and other spiritual methods & practices over 20+ years has been to automatically see the good or divine that exists, often under the surface, in people. Which, at times and with certain people, has left me open to being used, and being stolen from. This can leave you not only disadvantaged but resentful.

Yes, resentments can be healed in a person (though that takes time, often), but I'll go on to explain my topic...

Up to a point, I guess we can each tolerate some abuse from others. Still, I feel that (for example) for a parent who must be responsible not only for him- or herself but for kids, there is often less room for being cheated out of the compensation for his/her efforts. Your personal "economics" is a matter of practicality.

Hence, I feel that while being able to contact and feel/appreciate Source - and recognize it in other people - the ability to sense the particularities of the human character of individuals is also important.

Your thoughts?

[Mr Interesting]

Yesterday I sold something on the internet and the people came round and handed me an envelope and told me to open it and count it. I said I don't have to... they said why not. I said it's not my karma if it's not what was asked for but yours.

It wasn't a matter of trusting them but trusting myself.

If one is truly, and excuse my pushing out the sacred texts, is in love you cannot be hurt and as Jesus said 'render unto Caesar that which is Caesars'

[Tanemon]

Originally Posted by Mr Interesting

Yesterday I sold something on the internet and the people came round and handed me an envelope and told me to open it and count it. I said I don't have to... they said why not. I said it's not my karma if it's not what was asked for but yours.

It wasn't a matter of trusting them but trusting myself.

If one is truly, and excuse my pushing out the sacred texts, is in love you cannot be hurt and as Jesus said 'render unto Caesar that which is Caesars'

I agree that if a person cheats, steals from, assaults, unnecesarily defames, or otherwise harms another person, the karma affects the perpetrator. That's a topic, but that's not quite what I'm wanting to discuss.

Okay... Example: if someone steals from me and my family, there's immediate harm to my family. The theft may impact our ability to pay our rent or mortgage, it may impact our ability to afford food or electrical power. Etc.

I also understand the idea that what you get, when you're "cheated" or stolen from, is your karma. Nevertheless, people all over the world and in all ages have attempted to guard themselves and their families from being cheated, assaulted, etc. It's a form of "discrimination wisdom" (to use the Buddhist terminology).

This is the tricky balance I want to discuss... Openness/unconditional-love as balanced by, or intertwined with, character assessment.

Originally Posted by Tanemon

I agree that if a person cheats, steals from, assaults, unnecesarily defames, or otherwise harms another person, the karma affects the perpetrator. That's a topic, but that's not quite what I'm wanting to discuss.

Okay... Example: if someone steals from me and my family, there's immediate harm to my family. The theft may impact our ability to pay our rent or mortgage, it may impact our ability to afford food or electrical power. Etc.

I also understand the idea that what you get, when you're "cheated" or stolen from, is your karma. Nevertheless, people all over the world and in all ages have attempted to guard themselves and their families from being cheated, assaulted, etc. It's a form of "discrimination wisdom" (to use the Buddhist terminology).

This is the tricky balance I want to discuss... Openness/unconditional-love as balanced by, or intertwined with, character assessment.

Hi brother. This is a very intelligent thread! I will say this; that I bless you and your family. Peace.

Originally Posted by Mr Interesting

Yesterday I sold something on the internet and the people came round and handed me an envelope and told me to open it and count it. I said I don't have to... they said why not. I said it's not my karma if it's not what was asked for but yours.

It wasn't a matter of trusting them but trusting myself.

If one is truly, and excuse my pushing out the sacred texts, is in love you cannot be hurt and as Jesus said 'render unto Caesar that which is Caesars'

Trusting SELF. Indeed.

[Gem]

Originally Posted by Tanemon

I agree that if a person cheats, steals from, assaults, unnecesarily defames, or otherwise harms another person, the karma affects the perpetrator. That's a topic, but that's not quite what I'm wanting to discuss.

Okay... Example: if someone steals from me and my family, there's immediate harm to my family. The theft may impact our ability to pay our rent or mortgage, it may impact our ability to afford food or electrical power. Etc.

I also understand the idea that what you get, when you're "cheated" or stolen from, is your karma. Nevertheless, people all over the world and in all ages have attempted to guard themselves and their families from being cheated, assaulted, etc. It's a form of "discrimination wisdom" (to use the Buddhist terminology).

This is the tricky balance I want to discuss... Openness/unconditional-love as balanced by, or intertwined with, character assessment.

I don't know about Karma, but there is a need for protection, or self care, or the protection of children, and in life, no matter what the spiritual ideals say, there is a pragmatic practicality in dealing with circumstances, so where trust is idealized there's also people who harm and are out for whatever they can get, so prudence has a lot of merit.

I feel it is important to discriminate. People with good intentions are often easily taken advantage by people with ill intentions. So, love them at a distance, lol. You can pray for them. If you feel responsible for people who are draining and toxic to your well-being, you may hurt yourself more than you know. You are human and are therefor susceptible to harm. Take care of yourself, so you can take care of others that matter most to you.

Tanemon - have you seen Sorcerer's recent thread on unconditional love?

http://www.spiritualforums.com/vb/sh...ad.php?t=48506

I take up this very issue you address here, i.e. of being open to being abused, by giving an example that affected me. I did gain insight and direction from the example I gave there - I hope it helps but I see now that silent whisper has given a helpful post (directly below) on the abuse situation .

It would appear that if we come from a higher spiritual perspective, then we cannot be harmed from what occurs to our ego. It is very noble to practise unconditional love but a very tall order, I find, to achieve such a state. Many members are also doubtful but it is a worthy goal if you feel it can be attained from a pure, higher perspective where you will be protected from your ego.

Originally Posted by Tanemon

I'm posting this because, like many or most people on this forum, I've experienced states of unconditional love. And like most, I've had to make my way in the world and navigate through situations and individuals or groups of people who could hinder or harm me or my loved ones (family, female partner, child).

My mother used to teach us that we should "look for the good in people" - pretty similar to what Sourcerer has included as his 'signture' (quoting Babaji): "Recognize God and goodness in every face."

In life, most of us will encounter people who - because of their needs or personal drives - may exploit us, steal from us, blame things on us (that we didn't do), and so on. The outcome of my meditation and other spiritual methods & practices over 20+ years has been to automatically see the good or divine that exists, often under the surface, in people. Which, at times and with certain people, has left me open to being used, and being stolen from. This can leave you not only disadvantaged but resentful.

Yes, resentments can be healed in a person (though that takes time, often), but I'll go on to explain my topic...

Up to a point, I guess we can each tolerate some abuse from others. Still, I feel that (for example) for a parent who must be responsible not only for him- or herself but for kids, there is often less room for being cheated out of the compensation for his/her efforts. Your personal "economics" is a matter of practicality.

Hence, I feel that while being able to contact and feel/appreciate Source - and recognize it in other people - the ability to sense the particularities of the human character of individuals is also important.

Your thoughts?

When we are invaded, taken from, abused....there is a point where we may choose to let go, not only of the emotions that bind us to the event, but the actual energy that binds us to holding onto the event...When we clear ourselves fully within, one just knows, one is no longer bound by the old past patterns.

Loving your pain, loving you is letting go...the only one caught up in not loving themselves unconditionally.........is YOU..You are the love, when you heal the pain of the past and clear yourself fully...

The other and future others who may have in the past abused you..are now responsible for finding their own space of love in the infliction on you. Your part is done..

You clear the past in you..to find unconditional love for self...the rest is not your story of love...

YOU ARE THE STORY OF UNCONDITIONAL LOVE...when you no longer need the story in you your are just UNCONDITIONAL LOVE.

pain and stories bind us...letting go of binds is all in you...:)

From your perspective the story is now transformed one with you...

You have the power to transform any event in your life...fully.