Does anyone else really love to be alone?

[Dargor]

When I'm not hanging out with one or more close friends, I usually like to be alone because I am a misanthropic jerk. For instance, I always pick my seat in the bus that is the furthest away from other passangers and I get overwhelmingly annoyed when forced into a space with too much people. Although, realistically it's sometimes unavoidable.

[JosephineB]

Originally Posted by SlayerOfLight

When I'm not hanging out with one or more close friends, I usually like to be alone because I am a misanthropic jerk. For instance, I always pick my seat in the bus that is the furthest away from other passangers and I get overwhelmingly annoyed when forced into a space with too much people. Although, realistically it's sometimes unavoidable.

I do that with the bus seats too. And put my bag on the other seat. I'm not totally heartless though, I do move said bag if the bus gets busy

I do the opposite to manspreading if sitting next to someone, it's more a contraction.

[Pewdiepie]

I love to be alone until I start to miss those whom I once loved

I live with my family in a house (trying to desperately move out) and we actually have a neighbor who almost every day enters through the fence in our backyard, and knocks on our back patio door to chat with us with her dogs. It was OK at first, but now it is literally almost EVERY FREAKIN DAY that she does this! She is a Russian-American who speaks normal English and is a bit crazy. Our theory on why she comes over every day is that she has a drunk chubby husband who neglects her and so she wants to be more with us I guess??? By the way, every time she comes over she brings her psychotic screaming cocka-poodle (cocker spaniel and a poodle) 140 pound mastiff/pitbull who is the dumbest yet nicest dog you'll ever meet.

Your next step in this situation depends on what type of person you want to be, which you already described in your post. If I were you, I would just ignore her texts and only answer them at a select time of the day. If you don't want to create drama, your best bet is to be passive-aggressive and to ignore her texts and calls as much as you can. I had to do this with a friend once. He was very pushy in wanting to talk and hang out and I stood my ground while also holding back my desire to be mean. And now we are still friends, and he is a changed person who actually currently works for the White House.

First of all, when she is with you, what does she even talk about? Her problems? Life? Maybe first try to theorize why she is so needy towards you and then go from there.

[Lucky]

Thanks Pewdiepie, I can see how your frustrations with your neighbor are similar to mine! Her husband being drunk is likely the reason she comes to see your family every day. The neighbor lady I'm talking about is divorced and she's very lonely. All she ever talked about with me is her job and gossip. I mean, every detail of every day about her day at work. I don't mind being a friend to someone or holding space for someone but when they latch on to me like that I feel smothered. Even when I was single I didn't feel the need to constantly call my friends or hang out with someone. I loved being single and not having to answer to anyone actually. I don't know, I guess I'm a rare breed, but I just can't relate to people that constantly need people.

[Pewdiepie]

You should joke with her and say “Who are you going to talk to everyday once I move out?”

[blackraven]

Originally Posted by Lucky

Is this a test of me reinforcing my boundaries or just another case of someone clingy who just doesn't get it?

I would say it's both! If you feel you are completely done with your friendship, then It's already over because it takes two people being on board with any relationship for it to survive or work. I have pushed people away from me, perhaps unknowingly, because I no longer wanted to be in any sort of relationship with them. I'm not proud of how I went about pushing them away, but in the end it was for the best. I've been on the receiving end of others ending relationships with me as well. I hold past people I knew with high regard and hope the best for them in life. Some relationships are just too draining, harmful or dysfunctional.

You're in a tough situation living so close to her. But boundaries clearly need to be understood by this individual.

Best to you.

[Miss Hepburn]

I have never felt lonely a day in my life.
I adore being alone ....and Nov 14....I will be again!!
After almost 2 yrs...my sister is moving back to NY.
Alone at last!....again..

[Sarian]

I prefer to be alone. Sometimes i wonder if there is something wrong with me. For example. I love to trail run or walk. I go as early as I can in the morning to avoid people. My heart will sink if I see a car which means I might encounter a person on the trail. The lower portion of one trail can get busy as people rouse and get on with their days...if I see even one person, I feel constrained and suffocated. I will smile and say hello to people but I prefer to have absolute solitude.

I've had some moments where I thought perhaps it might be nice to have a relationship with someone again. I've been out of one for 3 years now, but men I've met want more and start planning and I feel like this noose is tightening around my neck...now I might have the thought pass through my mind but I imagine someone actually wanting more of my time other than dinner and I get fearful if not panicky...now I just avoid any chance of someone even asking me out. lol...

[Lucky]

Sarian, I know how you feel! I can't say I get panicky when I see people in general like if I'm out and about but I do get an unsettling feeling at times when I see people I know, I guess because I know they're going to want small talk and Im not always in the mood for that. It's partly my fault I guess...I am friendly and smile and say hi to people a lot...like an extroverted introvert I suppose...but once my boundaries are pushed I just turn cold.

[ThatMan]

Originally Posted by Miss Hepburn

I have never felt lonely a day in my life.
I adore being alone ....and Nov 14....I will be again!!
After almost 2 yrs...my sister is moving back to NY.
Alone at last!....again..

I know very well how it feels!!!! When I spent more than a year away from my family I was so happy and free that I can't express the joy in words, I love to be alone!! I found out that when I am all alone that's when I feel so much closer to the Creator... Soon I will be alone again and I will have a party for myself I know this my sound crazy but once I ate with the Creator, I prepared a meal for Him too That was the time when I wrote one of my most beautiful poems for the Creator.

Alone, at last!! That's what I said too!!!!