Would you date a separated but still married person?

[7luminaries]

Originally Posted by Raziel

URGH ...

It was put forth during innnerlight's post that there was an anti male theme, I actually defended a vast majority of the women on here in stating that it only really seemed to be a single posters theme.

If there are no breadcrumbs to follow then no single poster should have anything to worry about.

I only named Voldemort.

It was not presented as an offensive statement merely an idea to perhaps read the thread fully & note where the theme takes place.


Your free to be offended.

What are your favourite biscuits?

.

Raziel, I don't know who you have in mind nor how you may think what you said is supporting anyone.

As I see it, ALL the women here have spoken sincerely and thoughtfully for the OP's consideration, and not a single one deserves to be bullied or disparaged.
REGARDLESS if you agree with her or not. Shocker, eh?

I am asking you to cease and desist targeting ANY single poster here, and particularly to stop with derogatory labels, names, or otherwise disparaging them.

IMO it sounds like you hate women and you are looking to single out some particular woman to bash, so that you can claim there is a bad apple and you get to say who. Then having said who is bad, you can bash them freely as "anti-male", etc., whilst claiming you really are fine with women's thoughts and opinions. Just not the "bad ones".

If this is not your intention, then please cease and desist with personal (if unnamed) attacks toward the woman in question, whoever she may be.

I don't want to have to report these posts so I would like to give you the opportunity to leave off.

Peace & blessings
7L

[AnneC2013]

omg how do u report someone on this site for being so nasty on someones thread like as I reading Raziels post I feel like she is being an online bully to the orginal poster and to 7luminares.. this isn't right.. what happen to respect for others.. raziel you have no right to bully others maybe if you having issues u should resolve them and be positive before responding to others and if ur are board find another hobby. you need to stop responding to this post..

[cjcox859]

I don't see anything wrong with it at all as long as your not good friends with her husband or something.

[Raziel]

I have broken no rules & I made no personal attacks.

This is obvious unless anyone can actually name the poster that I am supposed to have attacked?

I responded to a posters question & do not intend to post on this thread again unless the OP provides a further update.

Please stay on topic & calm down.

.

[SaturninePluto]

It seems the original poster has not responded.

I have not seen male bashing at all in this thread.

I suppose it depends on how you define this?

What I read was- the advice to wait before jumping in with a man whom has told an individual he is separating.

I myself suggested the op simply wait.

Someone telling you they are separating actually doesn't even mean they are. Male or female.

We don't know how well the op knows this person.

We don't know this person or that they've even done anything wrong.

I haven't read male bashing.

But I have read a lot of continuous arguing and no not only from Raziel.

From 7 lum also- and with all due respect 7 and no offense actually intended, and with much love. We know how you feel about this already.

You've stated so countless times here in this thread and others too. And yes without a doubt you have a right to your view, your thoughts, and to be able to express them.

But please, so does Raziel.

I do very much feel the terms male bashing.

As well as - I think you Hate Women.

Are two very personal, very incorrect statements, being put forth.

Arguing in a discussion forum? Yes it happens occasionally.

It usually has a two person minimum of the good old back and forth.

I'd prefer not see any member on this thread reported.

But that isn't my choice.

I will say the Op has not responded, and every one of us have offered great advice here, I see nothing wrong with any of the advice given here not any of it. Some posters suggested simply to wait, and other posters suggested to live your life and not to fear living it.

Both of these suggestions sound very right to me.

We've all had our view expressed every one of us.

This should be enough.

How about we all ceasefire and leave it at that?

[Inika]

Men will sleep with you, and string you along for years with no intention of leaving their partner. Etc, etc

why i stand by my post on this thread lol. if a woman or a man is emotionally entangled with a previous to present already committed person to another. no one wins.
i wouldnt even want to touch that type of situation with my breath.

its stupidity. but people want lessons in life. gotta grow and evolve from what they think they want in life somehow.

the contrast of understanding yourself. your boundaries, what you will allow, accept, not allow accept. your values. do i want this? i'll try it to see if i do. and its how you learn what you want, will and wont accept.

hearts get broken. its part of learning our limits.

in time, people will learn not to settle.

words are sometimes way too cheap. are fallen for easily.

no man bashing or woman bashing. both genders make mistakes. its how they learn.

[7luminaries]

Originally Posted by Raziel

I have broken no rules & I made no personal attacks.

This is obvious unless anyone can actually name the poster that I am supposed to have attacked?

I responded to a posters question & do not intend to post on this thread again unless the OP provides a further update.

Please stay on topic & calm down.

.

Raziel,
I don't respond to patronising or to commands, so I recommend you save your mental energies for equitable dialogue that is more courteous and respectful of me as your equal

Throwing out unnamed attacks against "a single poster" is a veiled threat, and is intended to be read as "watch out women - ANY ONE OF YOU may be attacked at any time by me as I'm targeting one woman for all my hostility, disparagement and labelling/name-calling."

The fact that you are yet again trying to circumvent courtesy and persist in ad hominem persona attacks and name calling without addressing it directly to the poster is IMO even worse than harassing someone directly, in a sense. Because you instead imply that any woman who posts on the thread may be the target of your hostility...which simply broadens the scope of your attack and does not help you.

Whether the OP responds or not, I respectfully recommend you engage respectfully and leave off personal attacks going forward, in any form.

Peace & blessings
7L

[SaturninePluto]

Originally Posted by Inika

why i stand by my post on this thread lol. if a woman or a man is emotionally entangled with a previous to present already committed person to another. no one wins.
i wouldnt even want to touch that type of situation with my breath.

its stupidity. but people want lessons in life. gotta grow and evolve from what they think they want in life somehow.

the contrast of understanding yourself. your boundaries, what you will allow, accept, not allow accept. your values. do i want this? i'll try it to see if i do. and its how you learn what you want, will and wont accept.

hearts get broken. its part of learning our limits.

in time, people will learn not to settle.

words are sometimes way too cheap. are fallen for easily.

no man bashing or woman bashing. both genders make mistakes. its how they learn.

Yep. Exactly, it is how we learn. Each and every one of us, living and learning from our mistakes. Couldn't agree more.

Have I told you lately, how much I value your posts?

[Raziel]

Originally Posted by SaturninePluto

But I have read a lot of continuous arguing and no not only from Raziel.

From 7 lum also- and with all due respect 7 and no offense actually intended, and with much love. We know how you feel about this already.

You've stated so countless times here in this thread and others too. And yes without a doubt you have a right to your view, your thoughts, and to be able to express them.

But please, so does Raziel.

I do very much feel the terms male bashing. As well as - I think you Hate Women.

Are two very personal, very incorrect statements, being put forth.

How about we all ceasefire and leave it at that?

Cease fire .. I've been ducking bombs ... perhaps Voldemort is presumed to be a forum member?

But sure cease fire sounds good & thank you.

.

[7luminaries]

Originally Posted by SaturninePluto

I do very much feel the terms male bashing.

As well as - I think you Hate Women.

Are two very personal, very incorrect statements, being put forth.

Saturn I appreciate your sentiments and I agree that making an effort to resolve things diplomatically and respectfully is always for the best -- and that those efforts are never ill spent, regardless.

Yes, I said to Raziel that when he blames one [unnamed] woman out of all the women on this thread -- it is a personal attack, even if he doesn't name the woman. Additionally, at the same time this approach ignores all the other women's individual voices who all said similar things about being cautious and showing restraint. So this really is about either shaming and silencing the "bad woman" and ignoring all the other women, from my perspective. I.e., keeping us all silent, ignored, and in our place. Thank God this is not representative of most men, LOL...but sadly, it's still happens, as we see here.

Threatening to single any one of us out and attack her as bad, and bash her with name calling. This is IMO a pre-emptive strike, if you will, to try to beat the "bad" women and their voices into silence, and a warning to the rest to remain submissive and passive so they too don't get bashed or picked on.

This is neither courteous, nor tolerant, nor certainly kind or loving. IMO this is a textbook act of misogyny.

Now, I said to Raziel, if you didn't mean what you said, then that's fair -- and to please cease and desist with further targeting and name calling of any individual woman poster.

You're right that what I stated was my impression based on his statements here. However, I also said I may be wrong and in fact, I hope that Raziel is able to see my humanity, and yours, and so forth, and that going forward, there would never be a need for him to target any one of us nor disparage or belittle any of us, nor call us names.

Peace & blessings
7L