How to love without fear?

[wolfgaze]

I know it's uncomfortable to do, but you have to explore the fear inside you and shine the light of awareness on it sufficiently - expose it fully so it can be consciously processed... Important to realize that in truth it's not the external circumstances that are responsible for the fear response - it's your internal circumstances which are influencing your thoughts, feelings, and perception of the external circumstances you are experiencing. Once you eventually process and resolve what's transpiring within you - the external circumstances can remain the same and you will find that you are now able to perceive everything in a new light and absent any fear.

[ForgedInFire]

Originally Posted by hellabomer

I am also waiting for the perfect timing and I might tell him everything. But since then, I am trying to control my anxiety. It's so easy to understand when it's my ego talking, and now I feel so strange having a voice in my head which is not even that much reliable.

There is no such thing as perfect timing. Stop living a lie..either stand in your truth and tell him or expect all the fears you refuse to face to manifest in your life. If you continually focus on all the bad things this is what you are telling the universe that is what you want to happen and it will reward you accordingly. I dont understand why people dont get this.

[Somnia]

Talk to him and tell him how you feel...I wouldn't advise cutting your communication without a reasonable explanation...If all of a sudden you cut off all communication/ties with him he will be left wondering what happened and I also believe you will have unresolved feelings on the situation if you run away from it out of fear...It's better to be straight forward and communicate with him about your feelings, even if he may not reciprocate them you will have a clear answer on where the two of you stand at this moment...

[hellabomer]

Originally Posted by ssdm1

Yes it is.

My story is I've know my twin for many years and we were together romantically when we were young, but then separated for many, many years. We recently reunited and I still do not think I'll ever be with him the way I want and that does still hurt even today. We text and talk on the phone, and he told me everything happened the way it did for a reason. He is happy with where he is in life even though he went through some very tough stuff. I see that there is a reason for everything, but I still don't know what that reason is, or how that affects the future. All I can do is try to trust the reason will be revealed and just be happy he is my friend and in contact. Never easy.

His phone number is even 1 digit different than mine, thus if you add 1111 to his number, you get mine. How's that for a sign?

I did tell him how I felt the other day and somehow that went right over his head. At least I feel I dodged a bullet and can still work on our relationship.

I am also trying to trust the reasons and God. It's hard, but I know, deep down, that whatever is happening, is happening for good.

[hellabomer]

Originally Posted by wolfgaze

I know it's uncomfortable to do, but you have to explore the fear inside you and shine the light of awareness on it sufficiently - expose it fully so it can be consciously processed... Important to realize that in truth it's not the external circumstances that are responsible for the fear response - it's your internal circumstances which are influencing your thoughts, feelings, and perception of the external circumstances you are experiencing. Once you eventually process and resolve what's transpiring within you - the external circumstances can remain the same and you will find that you are now able to perceive everything in a new light and absent any fear.

Yes, I am aware the if something triggers me, it's because something is lacking on the inside. But you know, a human is conditioned to always look for the danger outside, and not inside. That's why it's a bit hard to turn all your attention inside yourself. I am trying. I have started meditation again, and I am trying to rely on that higher power (no matter how scary it seems). Keeping positive thoughts is the hardest path, but I am hoping that through continuous practice, I will be able to turn my thoughts around.

[hellabomer]

Originally Posted by wraithklewn

There is no such thing as perfect timing. Stop living a lie..either stand in your truth and tell him or expect all the fears you refuse to face to manifest in your life. If you continually focus on all the bad things this is what you are telling the universe that is what you want to happen and it will reward you accordingly. I dont understand why people dont get this.

I agree with you. But what if you know that the other person is even going through a very hard time in their life, too? And that even if we jump into a relationship right away, it won't be that fulfilling due to the continuous issues that arise inside me or him. I think that more than being together, this TF relationship is about facing our issues head on. My issues are not related to the fears on the outside, I have always been an insecure, doubtful and controlling person. And for the first time, I am trying to surrender and go with the flow. Going with the flow also demands patience, I guess.

[hellabomer]

Originally Posted by Somnia

Talk to him and tell him how you feel...I wouldn't advise cutting your communication without a reasonable explanation...If all of a sudden you cut off all communication/ties with him he will be left wondering what happened and I also believe you will have unresolved feelings on the situation if you run away from it out of fear...It's better to be straight forward and communicate with him about your feelings, even if he may not reciprocate them you will have a clear answer on where the two of you stand at this moment...

It's true that it will be left unresolved. This action would be just a way to run away from my fears. I think that I will try to hold on and see where the Higher Power takes me.

[Shivani Devi]

Originally Posted by hellabomer

My TF and I are close friends. Call me stupid, but I want to block him from all social medias and stop talking to him. I am so scared that there will come a day when I have to accept another girl in his life (Even though nothing like that has happened but anxiety!) that it makes me feel like I should rather destroy everything myself. In this one week, I have got 2 direct signs from God that I should focus on unconditional love towards him. It's like, God is asking me to jump in the river and he's saying that he'll make sure that I won't drown, and I am just standing at the edge, not believing a word.
I can't trust God, I can't trust my TF, I just can't trust anyone right now.

Hello, my friend.

This is a difficult situation I am going through myself right now, so I can feel for you and your pain.

My TF and I are more than just 'close friends', but what you are describing about God is what is holding me back from total commitment to a relationship.

Just put your TF 'on hold' for a while - a week or so, but say you need some time to think (I can't talk to mine when I get like this either) and ask yourself something very important - doesn't unconditional love for God also include unconditional trust?

You don't have to believe a word that God says if that love is really there; all you have to do is just let go and surrender to it...let yourself drown in that river...it's scary, very scary at first to totally lose who you think you are and believe yourself to be, but it comes back...trust me.

After this, re-assess your relationship with your Twin Flame. Most times the emotions we are afraid of, is feeling undeserving of love or even scared of the emotion itself as it pertains to human beings because loving God is natural and easy by comparison.

Trust your heart in this and all the best.

[Marie]

Why wait? It gets worse and worse. He either does, or not.