Lack of excitement and feeling of loneliness

[pf2222]

I don't seek a purpose on life.
I don't care.
While I'm here though, I want to feel like I live.
And right now, or for that matter since I started working two years ago, I am not feeling alive.
The fault is not the work. It's my life in general.
I have no interests.
I care about nothing.
I'm lazy.
And so on.
I live so I can listen to music (metal and rap) and that's pretty much it.
I love anime, cartoons, movies, wanted to make my own anime but all of that became irrelevant to me. I don't care about it any more.
I hate sports.
I hate drinking.
I hate traveling.
I hate concerts.
I hate clubs.
I hate reading.
I hate caffes.
I hate bars.
I don't gamble.

I ocassionally write lyrics. But that's just a passtime activity.

I cannot hold a conversation properly. Not because I am shy but because I have no experiences going on in my life so I have literary nothing to talk about except work. A week ago I went out with 2 good couleages (not sure how to spell that) one is a girl I like and the other a guy.

Now liking the girl and still being single is an entirely different topic so try not to focus on that. It's mainly because I feel incopetent to live in a way...

Point is, that other friend was the conversation carrier. I hardly have any sentences popping into my head. Had we been alone I would've felt so awkward with the silent moments.


A different day I went with 2 friends out, went around shops just casually chilling and talking. Yeah we did talk, but I'm never an initiator.

So on and forth, with each outing like that I'm glad I was with people I care about but it always feels lackluster.

I am trying to go out more but we really have nowhere to go...

I feel lonely no matter that I have friends, and I am not excited at all in life. I want to do something but I hate every activity that comes to mind.

How do I fix myself lol?

[ocean breeze]

Originally Posted by pf2222

How do I fix myself lol?

I don't see how anyone can answer that for you. Why would you need fixing? What do you feel is broken? I don't see anything broken from what i'm reading. You're just different. Perhaps you're looking to fit in better and become more superficial.

I want to do something but I hate every activity that comes to mind.

I can see that. You've been here since February and only have 5 posts. I can only assume you must hate online forums as well. Nothing wrong in that of course. If anything perfectly understandable.

[BigJohn]

Originally Posted by pf2222

I don't seek a purpose on life.
I don't care.
While I'm here though, I want to feel like I live.
And right now, or for that matter since I started working two years ago, I am not feeling alive.
The fault is not the work. It's my life in general.
I have no interests.
I care about nothing.
I'm lazy.
And so on.
I live so I can listen to music (metal and rap) and that's pretty much it.
I love anime, cartoons, movies, wanted to make my own anime but all of that became irrelevant to me. I don't care about it any more.
I hate sports.
I hate drinking.
I hate traveling.
I hate concerts.
I hate clubs.
I hate reading.
I hate caffes.
I hate bars.
I don't gamble.

I ocassionally write lyrics. But that's just a passtime activity.

I cannot hold a conversation properly. Not because I am shy but because I have no experiences going on in my life so I have literary nothing to talk about except work. A week ago I went out with 2 good couleages (not sure how to spell that) one is a girl I like and the other a guy.

Now liking the girl and still being single is an entirely different topic so try not to focus on that. It's mainly because I feel incopetent to live in a way...

Point is, that other friend was the conversation carrier. I hardly have any sentences popping into my head. Had we been alone I would've felt so awkward with the silent moments.


A different day I went with 2 friends out, went around shops just casually chilling and talking. Yeah we did talk, but I'm never an initiator.

So on and forth, with each outing like that I'm glad I was with people I care about but it always feels lackluster.

I am trying to go out more but we really have nowhere to go...

I feel lonely no matter that I have friends, and I am not excited at all in life. I want to do something but I hate every activity that comes to mind.

How do I fix myself lol?

Seems like you have joined the Club almost everybody else has joined one time or another.

[inavalan]

Don't ask others. Ask your inner Higher Source of Knowledge!

Using self-hypnosis or meditation you can do that. Good luck!

[Honza]

It sounds like a deep sense of rejection which is leading to low self esteem. I can recommend a book called "You Can Heal Your Life" by Louise Hay. The book has sold over 50 million copies. It helps all manner of people.

People often join this forum to find ways of helping themselves and their life. I have been at rock bottom too. I found that I need to nurture and care for myself.

Best Wishes.