Hello everyone, what to do....

[Magical mermaid]

So... I've always been interested to astrology since childhood. But both my parents are adopted....so I pretty much have no idea what I am were I or where my parents came from, but I've ALWAYS felt that I didn't belong, I've always felt different. (I remember all my dreams especially the ones as a child cause I had. Few that impacted me and have stuck with me to this day, I can remember it like a pic, and I can remember how I felt as well) . So that has made me even more curious. I feel a connection to something somewhere, I just don't know who or what or where it is, idk. I'm very confused in my life right now. I don't talk to anyone I know cause I scare them when I talk about me, and how I feel and what not, but who do I ask these questions?? Isn't that really the question???!!?