how do you cope with Rejection?

[girlsearching]

Originally Posted by joyfirst

When someone rejects us, it is not because we are bad or they are unappreciative of our love.
I think rejection hurts, when we have some underlying beliefs, such as " I am not good enough, if he(she) rejected me", " I am not able to manifest falling in love with someone, who will love me back (aka -I am a lousy manifester), etc.
We can try to find those beliefs, and then question them (Katie Byron has a great method to do that), and then replace them with new beliefs "I am good enough" , "I am manifesting better every day", etc, by using them as an affirmation the whole day as a mental loop. I think it takes 1-3 months to install new belief, if you use this intensive method.

sometimes I feel as if I was never good enough for a guy, and I always assume that we must be un compatible with each other.

[joyfirst]

So here you have it - "I am not good enough", and that is what hurts, not the rejection itself. Ask yourself : " can I absolutely know, that it is truth?", and go through all other Katie Byron questions, although her work is easier to do with questions and beliefs about others.

[FruitLoop]

Acknowledge it wasn't meant to be and try to move on, it might hurt for a while and this is normal, but things happen for a reason.

I've been rejected and I've been the person rejecting. Neither situation is pleasant, but I learned a lot and sometimes you have to take heart from the lesson. One day you will look back and be glad things happened the way they did :)

[Renessme]

@girl searching, scarlethayden and joyfirst, it took a while before i reached that state lol i also had those insecurities and that oh i will never be enough monologue haha but yes, i have been the person doing the rejecting and the person rejected. When i was rejecting a person its not because i think there is something wrong with them but because i dont have any interest in them ---> i wouldnt know what to do with them, like i dont live tem in that way so why give in to their wish of say being in a relationship with them. The reason is always me when i reject someone and it is less gecause of them.

When i was rejected, i was in despair, it was a humbling experience. My huge ego didnt like it one bit. But it was what made me look more inside. And theb i realized he was not the only person who rejected me. I was subconsciously rejecting myself too, hence me rejecting people who would otherwise be good for me, and also me welcoming and subconsciously manifesting people who are not so good for me lol its like the universe had to physically show to me how i am rejecting myself by being rejected by this person. And after seeral rjections, not just in terms of love and romance but as person or as a career professiinal, i figured majority of the times, i was rejected because i do not fit with what they want, yes i may have some misgivings but hugely it was because they have nothing to do with me if ever. So it was less about me and more to do with the one rejecting, similar to how when i reject a person its not because he is this or that but because this is me. And this me cannot fit him in who i am now. Hope that makes sense lol

[Gem]

Originally Posted by joyfirst

So here you have it - "I am not good enough", and that is what hurts, not the rejection itself. Ask yourself : " can I absolutely know, that it is truth?", and go through all other Katie Byron questions, although her work is easier to do with questions and beliefs about others.

In all fairness, 'not good enough' was a suggestion that you initially made.

[Gem]

Originally Posted by FruitLoop

Acknowledge it wasn't meant to be and try to move on, it might hurt for a while and this is normal.

Cheers thanks... that's basically how it feels and I also thought it was normal.

I've been rejected and I've been the person rejecting. Neither situation is pleasant, but I learned a lot and sometimes you have to take heart from the lesson. One day you will look back and be glad things happened the way they did :)

Yep live and learn...

[girlsearching]

Originally Posted by FruitLoop

Acknowledge it wasn't meant to be and try to move on, it might hurt for a while and this is normal, but things happen for a reason.

I've been rejected and I've been the person rejecting. Neither situation is pleasant, but I learned a lot and sometimes you have to take heart from the lesson. One day you will look back and be glad things happened the way they did :)

you're right Fruitloop I like your username, reminds me of a fun person who you can act silly with. I have done some rejecting too it's not fun on both sides of the stick. But not everyone gets the person that they desire, I personally know girl-friends and guy-friends who seem to always end up with their interest though. The Force of law of attraction must be strong with them. a little star wars pun.

[Robinski78]

This rejection thing, is one of the strangest aspect one can encounter...

About fifteen years ago, I linked up with a soulmate and our relationship blossomed...

Then, after about five years, we started to have problems, mostly related to the lack of respect, her children showed to their mother...

Being some twenty seven years older than my SM, I suppose I could be considered as a member of the old school, where in some aspects of family life, children did as they were told and not as they wanted... Sadly (or so I considered at that time) my SM leant in favour of allowing all she's come to understand family life to be: to rule the day... Concequently, the relationship went to pieces and I very quickly felt I was no longer welcome in that family home...

Naturally, that saddened me, but without a second thought, I packed my bags and left...

Over the ensuing years, right up to the present date, our relationship has blossomed in an entirely different way, with a caring, friendly (separate life) companionship, bonding us together as might be in a brother/sister situation... We love each other to bits ~ from a distance: so to speak...

Her children, obviously, have long since left home, but their traits of disrespect linger on, still having a devestating effect on my SM...

But It is her choice to allow that to continue, although she does, from time to time, stand back from such ~ allbeit for short periods of time only...

Looking back, I saw no reason to be resentful about any part of that situation in any way and still hold similar thoughts as being paramount in my life...

So, for me, rejection is now nothing more than a tool of the 'life lesson' trade and to be honest, since accepting such a principle, it's added further peaceful characteristics to my way of life, which to this day: serve a very useful purpose...

[joyfirst]

You know, that is the reason, why I don't want a live in partner, because I don't want him to tell me, how to raise my child. I think, if you try to come between mother and her children (no matter how wrong their relationship looks to you), nothing good comes out of it. It is her journey, not yours.
I learned that with my friends. Before I would try to convince them, that their cancer can be healed naturally, and tried quite insistently. Never helped. One of them has passed on, from the chemo -it destroyed her liver. Yet, now I learned -freedom is more important than long life. She chose, what felt best for her. I should have stayed out of her business. Now I do. Well, more frequently anyway.
Trying to convince someone, when they are not ready to listen is a gentler kind of abuse.

Rejection. It has followed me all my life, but the worst rejection I have ever had was the day someone who I thought,( and had promised me) would never give up on me..... the day he told me he didn't want me anymore…..I died that day ….