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Go Back   Spiritual Forums > Religions & Faiths > Wicca

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  #1  
Old 27-05-2015, 07:11 PM
jaynewars
Posts: n/a
 
Exclamation Posted this in the Welcome board as well.

I posted this in the welcome board but seeing as I'm trying to discover Wicca and bring myself into the religion, I thought maybe someone would have an idea as to whats going on....

Hello,

I'll start off by introducing myself I suppose. I'm Mary, I'm the ripe young age of 18 and I've been haunted since I was young. I've never been religious, and I've had depression since I was young, I think it started when the psychiatrist told me I had ADHD and that I was not a normal child (This was at roughly 8 years old)

Well, I wouldn't say "haunted." I'd say "in constant fear and peril." And that is why I have come here.

I guess you could say I was 6 when it started. My family moved into a haunted house in Toronto, Canada. It was right down the street from a school that was supposedly haunted as well, the other kids on the block and at school would constantly tell me ghost stories about how an old man died, or murdered people, etc. I had no issues with the school- I assume the other kdis were just trying to scare me.

I felt awful as soon as I saw the house for the first time. The first night there I had a dream of an old white man in a cardboard box buried under the floor boards. From then on I heard footsteps at night, breathing in my ear, voices in the walls or I would feel them beside me.

We had only lived there a few months when my landlord rented out the basement suite to a single mom with two kids. If my fear of "Ghosts" (I'm going to use this word loosely) wasn't bad enough, these two teenage boys tormented me even further.

I'm sure you're all aware of the folk tale "Bloody Mary", you know, you go in the bathroom and shut off the lights and spin.... you get the picture. I can't even type it all.

Well, when they moved in they would constantly try to convince me that I, a young (now) 7 year old girl, was the embodyment of her and that one day I would go crazy and kill people like she did, and then I would be trapped in the mirror forever.

THis was constant, to the point where my parents didn't let us see them anymore. But of course I went looking for them.

ONE DAY, they locked me in the downstairs bathroom with the lights off. Then began to chant. My first instinct was to bang on the door but instead I fell to the ground and covered my ears with my hands and closed my eyes so I heard and saw nothing. They left me in there for a few minutes before their mother caught them.

Mind you, I was 7. One of these boys was already 20 years old.

Ever since the bathroom incident, I've seen her in my dreams. Sometimes even when I blink her face appears. Which is decayed and bloody, not a pretty site. Or sometimes, when I blink or shut my eyes for a moment I just see a set of eyes looking at me. Or I feel someone behind me, or standing in a corner.

In the years after this, I've had many "ghost" experiences. In the passed 4 years I've had an aunt, a mother, and a grandfather die. Each have come to me. I live in my grandfathers house, I notice him around the house frequently. He's not a problem for me. I know it's him, whether it be Energy or a ghost. Whatever form he is in I feel him smile all the time.

Pair this (minus my loved ones that I've encountered) with now an EXTREME irrational fear of bathrooms, and ESPECIALLY mirrors (now, if it's passed 10pm I can't look into a bathroom mirror, I'm scared of what the reflection may be), I'm now seeking to bring inner peace to myself.

I'm sorry if this is vague or all over the place, please PM me if you want more details.

I just don't know how..

I've recently picked up a book or two on Wicca and I feel as though it may be the religion I'd like to follow. This is why I put quotations around "ghosts", as they could be just left over energy. But if they are just energy, why do I get the image in my mind, constantly, of dead people?

My brain is like a zombie playground and Bloody M. is the school bully. Just constantly sitting in the back of my mind. My friend, and who I believe to be my soul mate, once told me that B.M. doesn't come to people unless they ask "her" to. Does that work with energies? I think it does, but Am I just attracting a negative energy? And why did it only start after my bathroom episode?

I'm so confused, in my beliefs, in my life, everything is so confusing and it's making me want to pull all my hair out.

Please, someone take the time to respond and help me figure this out.
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  #2  
Old 27-05-2015, 07:32 PM
PassionOfHybrid PassionOfHybrid is offline
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Join Date: May 2015
Posts: 900
 
Yes, you are attracting them. with words.

By simply stating that you are "haunted", that also will attract them.

do not create an opening for them.
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  #3  
Old 27-05-2015, 07:54 PM
jaynewars
Posts: n/a
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by PassionOfHybrid
Yes, you are attracting them. with words.

By simply stating that you are "haunted", that also will attract them.

do not create an opening for them.
I don't really know how I let them in to begin with.
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  #4  
Old 30-05-2015, 04:42 AM
Jenny Crow Jenny Crow is offline
Master
Join Date: May 2013
Posts: 2,194
 
Hi Jaynewars,

It sounds to me like you have mediumistic tendencies - you're quite aware of people who have passed on. If you don't want them coming to you, it's OK to ask them to leave. It's rare that they would want to do you any harm.

For your fear of bathrooms have you thought of getting any counselling? It must be awful to live in so much fear.

If you go to Wikipedia (just Google Bloody Mary and it will come up) you'll see that you have to ritually summon Bloody Mary and you haven't done that so I would assume that it is your fear that's producing images of Bloody Mary in your mind.

While you're still in this state of fear I really don't think it's a good idea to start in on Wicca. Read about it, sure, but don't start practicing until you're more stable (I don't mean that in a derogative or insulting way ).

It would probably help to meditate when you can and visualize yourself surrounded by a beautiful, calming white light - like an egg around you - this will help to protect you.

It just occurred to me that you said the boys (why would a 20 year old lock a 7 year old in a bathroom - seems to me there's something weird there) were chanting and you covered your ears but can you remember ANYTHING that they were saying? It is possible, but only very slightly, that they MAY have summoned something that's left a residual haunting with you.

Jenny Crow
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