Working on myself

[Enchanted_DreamFaerie]

I'm working on myself which is a good thing. Before I used to not do anything about it. Now I'm actually taking the courage to do little things for myself and trying to make myself a happier person. Healing from PTSD and trauma that happened in my childhood and being in a domestic violence relationship in my adulthood. I attracted the wrong types of people into my life and I knew how to set up proper boundaries.

So I took it upon myself to get rid of people in my life who weren't good for me and who made me feel horrible about myself. I love honesty more than anything and when people say something truthful I'm not hurt over it. However if it's abusive it's common for someone to be upset about it. When someone is honest with me, I may feel hurt inside. In a manner of minutes I end up forgetting about it, forgiving them and thanking them for their honesty.

One day one of my ex boyfriend's was honest with me about my destructive behavior and the pain that it caused him because I tried to numb myself. In the end I took his advice. Deep down though I always wanted to do it, I just didn't have the courage to try because I believe somehow I was scared or believed that I deserved to suffer. I don't deserve to suffer. Now I want to be happy and surround myself with happier people. Believe that everyone can heal and become happier people. It just depends on the person and sometimes it takes a little longer for people to move on past certain things that happened in their life. Not to long ago I watched a video on Youtube about a known survivor who is very optimistic, nice, caring and during the end he said something that made me tear up, "If I can just make one person smile one time a day I'm happy." I admire him and it's also given me the courage to heal and want to become a happier person. Love people like that and I smiled when he said that because now I have the strength to move on and now I can help others who are suffering and give them the courage to heal themselves. Never did I think I'd ever make it this far and boy I'm wrong. I'm dead wrong.

[Seawolf]

Congratulations on getting the abusive people out your life! I've done the same thing and feel like it was a big step. For people like us who've suffered alot, we have alot of motivation to heal. It takes time but I believe there is healing if we seek it and allow ourselves to get in touch with our bodies where the trauma is stored. Somatic Experiencing is becoming a popular tool to heal trauma, developed by Peter Levine. Also the recognition of Complex PTSD (CPTSD) is a big breakthrough today. People who've been traumatized at a young age attract more trauma throughout their adult lives until they can begin their recovery. The result is years and years of retraumatization which results in the symptoms of CPTSD.

Here's a page that lists some of the major symptoms

http://www.outofthestorm.website/symptoms/

I don't deserve to suffer.

You better believe it! Hell yeah.

[Enchanted_DreamFaerie]

Originally Posted by Seawolf

Congratulations on getting the abusive people out your life! I've done the same thing and feel like it was a big step. For people like us who've suffered alot, we have alot of motivation to heal. It takes time but I believe there is healing if we seek it and allow ourselves to get in touch with our bodies where the trauma is stored. Somatic Experiencing is becoming a popular tool to heal trauma, developed by Peter Levine. Also the recognition of Complex PTSD (CPTSD) is a big breakthrough today. People who've been traumatized at a young age attract more trauma throughout their adult lives until they can begin their recovery. The result is years and years of retraumatization which results in the symptoms of CPTSD.

Here's a page that lists some of the major symptoms

http://www.outofthestorm.website/symptoms/


You better believe it! Hell yeah.

Thank you for responding to my thread. I truly appreciate it a lot. It's hard for some people to want to talk about it or hear about it because it makes them feel uncomfortable. That's something I can understand. Thought it would be a good idea for me to express myself since I never used to have the opportunity to do so. Before I was so negative and was always so depressed all the time. In the end I got so tired of it and now I'm finally trying to move on with my life.

And yes, I don't deserve to suffer. Nobody does. Thank you once again.

Have a lovely week!! Thanks for the article.

[Seawolf]

Originally Posted by Enchanted_DreamFaerie

Thank you for responding to my thread. I truly appreciate it a lot. It's hard for some people to want to talk about it or hear about it because it makes them feel uncomfortable. That's something I can understand. Thought it would be a good idea for me to express myself since I never used to have the opportunity to do so. Before I was so negative and was always so depressed all the time. In the end I got so tired of it and now I'm finally trying to move on with my life.

And yes, I don't deserve to suffer. Nobody does. Thank you once again.

Have a lovely week!! Thanks for the article.

You're welcome! Thank you for having the courage to talk about this here. I agree it seems like it's hard for people talk about, and I can relate to that too. All my life I couldn't even understand it at all until recently. My emotions have been frozen all my life. Now i'm seeing a therapist that's very experienced with trauma and have been doing Kundalini yoga for PTSD, which is amazing. I can wake up feeling like hell, then do the yoga and instantly feel bliss in my mind. It's done in chair too which I like because I don't excercise much lol.

Thanks again for the thread and expressing your progress. It's like a breath of fresh air.