What Does Heart Chakra Opening Feel Like?

[Comet]

I have been healing the aftermath of an abusive relationship for some time. The hardest thing for me has been a constant 24/7 numbness / squeezing in my heart. Doctor said everything is fine, medications don't touch it, so I've been focusing on spirituality.

For almost a year I have been practicing forgiveness, since I read this is the key to the heart chakra. Since then I have encountered two distinct feelings. I am wondering which direction to focus on.

1) When I meditate on forgiveness because all perpetrators are suffering, I usually will cry and feel sad. It's emotional and heavy. It feels like the heart could maybe "unknot" if I break down enough?

2) When I meditate on releasing my shame and self-blame and low self-worth, I feel this amazing energy down the back of my head and entire spine, radiating from around / behind the heart area. Basically a sense of "I am good and loved and free to be myself". It feels like my crown chakra is showering my heart with infinite love. Nothing is heavy.

I am not sure which to focus on. Is forgiveness more of a sad heavy emotional unknotting with lots of crying, or a freeing surge of light and joy?

It is hard for me to know if I still need to process emotions, or if it's okay to just let go and feel joyful again. I am afraid I'm just "distracting" myself with this joyful energy, if there are emotions that need my attention.

Thanks!

[Shivani Devi]

Originally Posted by Comet

I have been healing the aftermath of an abusive relationship for some time. The hardest thing for me has been a constant 24/7 numbness / squeezing in my heart. Doctor said everything is fine, medications don't touch it, so I've been focusing on spirituality.

For almost a year I have been practicing forgiveness, since I read this is the key to the heart chakra. Since then I have encountered two distinct feelings. I am wondering which direction to focus on.

1) When I meditate on forgiveness because all perpetrators are suffering, I usually will cry and feel sad. It's emotional and heavy. It feels like the heart could maybe "unknot" if I break down enough?

2) When I meditate on releasing my shame and self-blame and low self-worth, I feel this amazing energy down the back of my head and entire spine, radiating from around / behind the heart area. Basically a sense of "I am good and loved and free to be myself". It feels like my crown chakra is showering my heart with infinite love. Nothing is heavy.

I am not sure which to focus on. Is forgiveness more of a sad heavy emotional unknotting with lots of crying, or a freeing surge of light and joy?

It is hard for me to know if I still need to process emotions, or if it's okay to just let go and feel joyful again. I am afraid I'm just "distracting" myself with this joyful energy, if there are emotions that need my attention.

Thanks!

Focus on the second, because when that is happening, the first one will totally resolve of it's own accord.

I focus on the love of a divine/greater being out there and my heart chakra springs to life with heaviness at first and then tears of joy.

All the best.