Earned Love Instead of Unconditional Love?

[Dargor]

Originally Posted by Ziusudra

Hmm.. Interesting.
It is sad that you are not able to recognize unconditional love being expressed all around you.

I see and feel unconditional love in many places, whenever someone expresses it by sacrificing self to protect, to help, and to save others, often strangers, without expecting anything back.

Unconditional love can be for the entire humanity, for an example.
Often humanitarians, heroes, spiritual leaders, healers, and etc. etc...

So, even none of us are perfect, there are others who love us unconditionally without even knowing us, just because we exist.
Isn't it wonderful?

Most of the time, kindness is rooted in selfishness. A kind deed (almost) has the same effect as drugs. People usually just do it to feel better about theirselves, plus they have something to brag about how much of a good person they are.

Be careful what you refer to as 'unconditional love', because you'd be shocked beyond measure if you found out their true motives.

[lomax]

Good post SOL.

[Ziusudra]

Originally Posted by SlayerOfLight

Most of the time, kindness is rooted in selfishness. A kind deed (almost) has the same effect as drugs. People usually just do it to feel better about theirselves, plus they have something to brag about how much of a good person they are.

Be careful what you refer to as 'unconditional love', because you'd be shocked beyond measure if you found out their true motives.

You bring up a good debatable point.
Yes, I agree that kindness can be rooted in self-rewards and yes, helping others can induce oxytocin and other positive effects in our brain.
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/b...science-giving

However, as you stated,

Originally Posted by SlayerOfLight

Most of the time, kindness is rooted in selfishness.

, so there are other times when it has nothing to do with "selfishness".
I don't think "selfishness" is the right word to describe "helping others" just because it makes one feels good.
Actually, this can be described as "self love".
Selfishness is doing something to gain something regardless of potential negative effects on others.

[Ziusudra]

I hate these duplications.......

[SpiritofZoe]

IMO that's a pretty cold message from someone who doesn't really know what love is, let alone unconditional love. Things like approval, rewards, consequences, etc those are conditional. True love is not conditional, and IMO people can learn to feel it, express it, and know the difference.