Say what you need to say

[Aloneyetnot]

Although I have never been a huge John Mayer fan, this particular song gives me all the feels. It has been a while since I've posted here. I tend to gravitate this way when I need to let my feelings or thoughts out somewhere, so thank you for continuing to be "that place" for me.

As I've posted before, my twin and I are friends. We have known each other for about 16 years. We are in contact, however he is the one who comes and goes because his feelings for me overwhelm him. We are both married; me happily and him so-so. He knows we have a special connection, but not that we are "twins."

My twin has not has positive relationships with women. His mom was not exactly nurturing, he goes in cycles with an unhealthy marriage, and he's never had a truly healthy relationship with another woman. He tends to let women walk all over him.

That being said, he is not a man who expresses himself well, yet there are a few things he has said to me that I hold in my soul. To me, they encompass exactly what this type of connection and journey is all about.

"I will love you always, until the end of time."

"I accept you for who you are, what you stand for, and everything that is part of you."

"I have this love and admiration for you that will never die."


It is an understatement to say that I feel grateful to have such a connection with another human being. I don't fully understand it, but I appreciate it for what it is. There are so many things I'd love to say, but I keep my words dormant and show my mutual care and love through my words and actions in a different way. My wish is that everyone could hear such words spoken with genuine truth. Love and joy to all.

In light,
AYN

[H:O:R:A:C:E]

here's the tune:
John Mayer ~ Say what you need to say
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nSS0wtjrm1U

[H:O:R:A:C:E]

here's what i wanna say:
will.i.am ~ This Is Love ft. Eva Simons
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9I9Ar6upx34

and this:
Ellie Goulding ~ Burn
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CGyEd0aKWZE