I just don't want to live, anymore!

[Shivani Devi]

Do you know what helps a lot, Blake my dear?

Whenever you do something or have plans for doing it, tell no-one. Do not share your plans, do not give any justification for your actions and learn the art of smirking and chuckling... acting all Dark and mysterious drives people crazy! Also, spend a lot of time on your own just meditating, doing Qi Gong and martial arts Kartas and you can even make a statement by meditating in a crowded, public place...I have sat in the middle of centre court at my local shopping mall, adopted the full Lotus position, Gyan mudra...then gone into meditation. This is not an act for the self conscious.

My goal is to totally hide my spiritual practices, work on myself and my energies until I lose half my body weight, replace fat with muscle...then get to the stage where I can set fire to newspaper or boil water with my bare hands...and if anybody asks me how I did that, I get to say "if I told you, I would have to kill you".