Jokes in the Sanctuary! (Joyous laughter is great medicine!)

#1 02-03-2011, 04:09 PM

Here goes, friends. Brace yourselves!

-Kar

"Church Bells"

On hearing that her elderly grandfather had just passed away, Katie went straight to her grandparent's house to visit her 95 year old grandmother and comfort her.

When she asked how her grandfather had died, her grandmother replied, "He had a heart attack while we were making love on Sunday morning."

Horrified, Katie told her grandmother that 2 people nearly 100 years old having sex would surely be asking for trouble.

"Oh no, my dear, " replied granny. "Many years ago, realizing our advanced age, we figured out the best time to do it was when the church bells would start to ring. It was just the right rhythm. Nice and slow and even. Nothing too strenuous, simply in on the Ding and out on the Dong."

She paused, wiped away a tear and then continued, "And if that damned ice cream truck hadn't come along, he'd still be alive today!"

Perspective · #2 13-03-2011, 03:32 PM

Thanks for the laugh, Simon! Laughter is great medicine!
I've got one for you...

My daughter's 5th-grade class had been studying astronomy.
One morning at breakfast, she announced, "On Friday we're having a quiz on the moon."

That's when her little brother piped up, saying, "Are you gonna let her go, Mom?"

#3 17-03-2011, 04:10 PM

SK - you are amusing to the core.
I'm stalking all your threads... (did I say that out loud?)
namaste

#4 18-03-2011, 04:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Simon Karlos

Here goes, friends. Brace yourselves!

-Kar
She paused, wiped away a tear and then continued, "And if that damned ice cream truck hadn't come along, he'd still be alive today!"[/size][/b]

You got me on that one!

Blessings
Abikisses

#5 24-03-2011, 11:46 AM

I would like to say that I wrote that joke myself, but...

#6 24-03-2011, 11:49 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Perspective

Thanks for the laugh, Simon! Laughter is great medicine!
I've got one for you...

My daughter's 5th-grade class had been studying astronomy.
One morning at breakfast, she announced, "On Friday we're having a quiz on the moon."

That's when her little brother piped up, saying, "Are you gonna let her go, Mom?"

Heh. Very welcome, and thank you!

Smart boy there!

Squatchit · #7 27-03-2011, 12:17 PM

HAHAHAHAHA.

I shared this before the SF crash so it's now lost. Here it is again...my favourite joke.

Question - What is the world's most common owl?

Answer - A Teat.

#8 27-03-2011, 12:20 PM

Did you know that if your parents didn't have kids the chances are you wont either?

G

Smiler · #9 27-03-2011, 12:52 PM

LOL .. Simon .. Laughter is the best medicine ever ! Thanks ..lol lol lol

:)

BlueSky · #10 27-03-2011, 08:19 PM

****...............thanks!