Question about TF.s behavior

[Helix6]

Originally Posted by Tortoise Walks

This is very wonderful stuff... your having found a way to exit relationships with manipulators/sociopaths and now being in a place where you can recognize and will no longer tolerate or allow controlling behavior in your life and hopefully no longer taking their actions personally.



This neither here nor there... but just to clarify I was not suggesting nor implying recreational sex... nor does the presence of an open relationship *always* equate to recreational sex although often when describing/sharing about any kind of open relationship thats what people hear regardless what I say... *shrugs* The meaning and the intention of my sharing of being open and honest and free wrt love feelings (not just fleeting lustful fancies) as they arise is obscured and lost by layers of percieved storylines and perhaps social expectations.

Many people who have felt they met a strong TF/SM type of connection yet don’t have/share a longterm romantic relationship discover another authentic loving relationship with which to happily build a family with if thats where life takes them. And there are those who were already in loving relationships when TF/SM entered their lives. I don’t believe it always means the love/caring for the prior TF/SM/partner is null and void. Just that they were open and inviting to more love entering their lives outside of TF/SM who may not have been open to such a relationship. Or they were knocked over their heads with undeniable love for a surprise TF/SM connection. I guess this is where i see potential parallels with an open relationship... the propensity, ability and freedom to deeply love more than one person... whether expressed externally or not. Physically sexual or not... And the potential receptivity of existing love partners to hear unfolding truths of their partner with as much of a compassionate open heart as they can muster. Without shaming and blaming. Setting personal ego hurts aside...




TW

Yes controlling behaviors are kinda "pushing me away" Stuff. Especially when we are women, men get afraid. Lol. One told me lately just practicing dance :"hey you re kinda independent woman, you must submit yourself sometimes" lol wuuuut. Never !


Ahah concerning recreational sex I understood what you said, I was just thinkin about that because most of people are seeing this like an entertainement as I see something much higher...and I ve always been disappointed by people behaviors on this point. There is often no real share, just people thinking in a pure sexual way that makes me feel very often frustrated.
Thats why now I prefer not to do anything when I feel that the other person doesnt care about who I am...

I like your view about Love...and potential multiple persons to Love in very different ways. This is true Love and not ego limited Love that wants to possess one person.

BTW, I sent you some interesting PM :-)))

[Helix6]

Hey Im back...

Aww it just happened again..I have shivers. Feel a bit confused, "sad" about us. He keeps putting himself straightly offline while Im still not talking to him.
I was going to talk to a friend on messenger and I saw him online my Heart jumped out my chest. Of course he went offline in less than 2mn.

Another sync a few days ago ...I met a nice foreign couple and I asked them where They were leaving in the country...the guy answered the name of the street where my TF used to Live when I first met him some years ago. Lol
And I mean its not a big famous street...especially cause Im quite New in this city and i don't really know the name of the streets. And this one is like a little street far away from the center.

Lol it never stops.

So I was pretty good at focusing on my own path and development these last weeks (and it works pretty well! Awakening Stuff I talk about in "Spiritualiy" section). But seeing himself online made me thinking deeply again...

I can pretend to move forward but all the signs are still sparkling lol.

(i saw your PM Tortoise Walk will answer you :)).

[ForgedInFire]

Why not just delete him and free yourself from a person who seems to be just another toxic runner twin flame? Keep em around and they will eventually give you reasons to toss em away.

[Helix6]

Hi,

Sorry for my late reply, was a bit busy.

Honestly, I don't feel deleting him especially because he did that to me the very first time few years ago....deleting is just a way to control the situation. Furthermore it can really Broke the other and making feel him rejected. Dont wanna play this game.

If he is my TF as he seems to be There is no way of toxic relationship. Just triggering points to heal each other.

He was really caring with me; he is just full of fears.

From my perspective, Im surrendering to the Divine Timing.
I stopped chasing him for almost 2 months now. I really feel bored. I did All I could from my side and now its time to heal myself without having expectations.

Opening to other experiences eventually (but each time I do this he comes back at the exact same moment...energies flipping back and forth).

[Helix6]

I found this text below and it helps a lot. Each time Im losing faith or feel bad I read it and immediately get better:

Running and chasing are both ways of controlling the connection. The person who is “chasing” is trying to control by getting the other to acknowledge the connection. They are afraid that if they can’t get through to the other person or if they leave the other to their own devices, that they will be forgotten.

The person labeled as the “runner” fears being seen and losing control of the situation. Not responding to the other is a way for them to feel that they are retaining control of everything. They fear the other person seeing who they truly are or getting lost in the connection.

When you chase your twin, you leave them no other role than runner. What would happen if you stopped chasing? Dropped expectations? Just stood still? Allow this situation to unfold on it’s own and see what happens.

Twin flames are an energetic connection. The more you let go, the more the other feels it and is drawn in. This energy is flipping back and forth between you all the time, whether you are conscious of it or not.

If you are chasing, there is only a push force. Have you ever stopped your role and just stood still? Did you feel disconnected from your twin? This is because if you felt them going through the pull towards you, you would go right back to chasing and flip the situation back.

Eventually, balanced is achieved. Neither pushing nor pulling. Just allowing. This is what spirit is helping twin flames with now. This can also be seen as a balanced masculine and feminine, or union, within. At this stage, control is surrendered.

One of you will have to go first. That usually means the so called “chaser”. You will have to be brave and let go of control. Let go of all your expectations.

When you chase, you tell the universe that you don’t trust this situation. You aren’t trusting that the universe has a plan for you. You aren’t trusting that there is a reason behind all you have been through. You aren’t fully allowing your growth to happen.

You are sending the message that you don’t trust your twin flame. Your vibration is saying, “If I don’t stay on top of this, if I don’t oversee my connection and my twin, this person is going to be lost to me so I’d better focus all my energy towards them so they will see me.” This is a fear vibration and will not manifest your union.

They are you. How can they ever be lost to you? If you don’t have faith and trust, in the universe, in your twin and in yourself, how can your twin flame? How can your twin flame release their fears and control if you can’t? Your consciousness is connected. Have faith that your twin is working hard to get back to you. I know you want proof of this but proof doesn’t allow for faith and faith is what this process is all about.

You are being asked to be brave right now. You are not seeing the whole picture. At times, spirit holds back the full picture because, let’s face it, often we are our own worst enemies. Something much bigger than you can imagine is unfolding in divine time. Let go. Take a leap of faith and trust that something is going to catch you. Because you need to move on. To union that is.

[ForgedInFire]

Anyone that is a true twin flame and on the journey for some time knows this teaching is false and misleading. One of many that are similar from the twin flame religious cult that will cause endless years and decades wasted with zero progress and increased needless suffering.

[starstar]

Originally Posted by Helix6

Hey Im back...


Another sync a few days ago ...I met a nice foreign couple and I asked them where They were leaving in the country...the guy answered the name of the street where my TF used to Live when I first met him some years ago. Lol
And I mean its not a big famous street...especially cause Im quite New in this city and i don't really know the name of the streets. And this one is like a little street far away from the center.

Lol it never stops.


I can pretend to move forward but all the signs are still sparkling lol.

(i saw your PM Tortoise Walk will answer you :)).

That's hardly a sign. That is something you paid attention to because you are focused on the guy so much.

[Inika]

he avoids you and does not talk to you for over a month now that he's banged you.


keep walking.

[Helix6]

Hey,

I was thinkin of why he was running so hard at mac Donald (lol) and I Heard this song from Katy Perry - By the grace of God:

Was 27 surviving my return to Saturn
A long vacation didn't sound so bad
Was full of secrets locked up tight like iron melting
Running on empty, so out of gas
Thought I wasn't enough and I wasn't so tough
Laying on the bathroom floor
We were living on a fault line
And I felt the fault was all mine
Couldn't take it any more
By the grace of God (there was no other way)
I picked myself back up (I knew I had to stay)
I put one foot in front of the other and I
Looked in the mirror and decided to stay
Wasn't gonna let love take me out
That way
I thank my sister for keeping my head above the water
When the truth was like swallowing sand
Now every morning
There is no more morning oh I
Can finally see myself again
I know I am enough
Possible to be loved
It was not about me
Now I have to rise above
Let the universe call the bluff
Yeah the truth will set you free
By the grace of God (there was no other way)
I picked myself back up (I knew I had to stay)
I put one foot in front of the other and I
Looked in the mirror and decided to stay
Wasn't gonna let love take me out
That way no
There ain't no
Not in the name of love
In the name of love (in the name of love)
That way
There ain't no
I'm not giving up
By the grace of God
I picked myself back up
I put one foot in front of the other and I
Looked in the mirror (looked in the mirror)
Looked in the mirror (looked in the mirror)
By the grace of God (there was no other way)
I picked myself back up (I knew I had to stay)
I put one foot in front of the other and I
Looked in the mirror and decided to stay
Wasn't gonna let love take me out
That way

Wow...stuck again.

Apart from that, I again hear people always Talking the exact place he lives...always !! That makes me crazy ! Lol

Anyways, he (and so I) need a lot of healing I think and the Journey is not achieved.
I ve done enough myself I know I strongly have to focus on my path.

If we are meant to be together it will happen in Divine Timing.
I dont have to wait. I have to move forward! I know he is kinda afraid but i cannot do anything more.

He has to get over (soft) drugs, finding himself and understanding his Kundalini symptoms(which raised when we met back a few months ago) so as a logical person he doesnt understand at all what s going on because not having the tools yet to understand this is spiritual Stuff and not medical conditions (which have been checked-all is good).
In a sense he knows I m the triggering point. I think thats why He runs so hard.
After we met last time we had big sync again and he was afraid and stop replied to me after this.

[Helix6]

Hi hu...I’m back ! After exactly 2 months ( :) ) I must say...I’m definitely sure he is my twin flame.

Can’t be coincidences anymore...

I experienced again something triggering.

I was was trying to forget him lately, to move forward....
l met a guy ... after months. We started to date a bit..and we had sex.
Prior to that I heard a very intimate song in a shop that was like speaking from my twin flame sayin «* I will come very soon*» etc. Very spiritual lyrics also I remember.
Then I was dating the other guy at night and as I said we had sex...(but deep inside I knew he was a narcissist and toxic for me...).
The exact day AFTER, in the early morning....my twin REACHED OUT.
After almost 4 months of NOT even one little contact. Nothing.
And I wasn’t dating anyone for couple of months.

It’s the second time it happens. Last time I met a guy few months ago and we had sex, my RF reached out 2/3 days after !! It’s insane !
Now we can’t deny there is a bond, he is feeling my energy on a subconscious level. He doesn’t know if I met someone else or so each time.
It’s really like he feels when I m starting to really move forward. Always the push-pull dynamic !

Now I feel so stuck.
It’s really like the Universe doesn’t want us be not together at this time.

Last night I dreamt of me chasing for signs of him, and an unknown masculine voice resonated and said very strongly (but warmly) : «*Wait.*»
It woke me up! Suddenly.
It was really in a «*be patient you ll have signs soon*» way.

Indeed since last time I was very broken and hurt by my twin because he ghosted me. So I withdraw for months and didn’t chase anymore after him. I told him lately when he reached out that I was very hurt by his behavior. He read the message but didn’t reply. I’m happy to have said it. He knows I’m deeply hurt.

Im feeling he will reach out soon*to apologize because he knows he messed up.


What do you think of all these signs ?
It’s like I cannot move forward with someone else. Each time I try he s coming back.
I don’t feel like going with somebody else for now. I’m happy on my own. I need to balance myself. Being in my cocoon for a while .