Need advice on talking with my son about spirituality, empath and awakening

[Anala]

I am humbly requesting advice.

My son who is 24 and away at college will be coming home for the summer. We talk weekly and he is becoming more aware of his empathic abilities. He is describing anxiety from feeling everyone’s emotions. So, I put this out to you all and your years of wisdom and experience.
What would you have wanted someone to say to ease the stress of feeling so much?

Are there books for young people?

Are there chat groups for young empaths?

I am most likely too close to this to really help in an affective way. He and I are cut from the same cloth.

I should explain he wears several labels, autism, genetically unique, ptsd, nde, medically fragile and a few that are only his to share. The labels vaguely provide a frame of reference, but do not define who he is.

Thank you for taking the time to read this.

Hi Anala

May I suggest that perhaps you can introduce him to gentle meditation techniques? Something that will allow him to learn, if it is possible, to not find emotions so overwhelming. In Buddhist meditation, for example, one sits and focuses more generally on the body and allows what comes to come, gently, allowing what is to arise, abide and then go. Maybe over time, such practices will give him more strength to deal with emotions that arise.

I am not familiar with your son or autism so speak in a general sense.

Wishing you and him the very best.

JL

Not so sure too much can be done. It isn't something that therapists and psychologists can help with. They can waffle and make suggestions that are rarely practical simply because a) they can't get to the individual's raw data (what, in actuality, has given them this blessing or curse, depending how you look at it), and b) will try to bend a person's "problem" to fit one of their preset solutions (which often reflect their own problems).

However, having maligned (!) therapists a possible solution could be to see himself in a quasi-therapist role, to appreciate the emotional stresses, the joys and pains and feel that he's in a position to help by way of understanding and sympathy without necessarily suggesting a solution (even if there is one). Then there are meditative exercises in which he can draw back and see a sufferer from a distance; to realise he probably can't do anything for them except if necessary listen as they talk. Often, talking through a problem casts light on paths to its resolution.

It's important to realise that the impetus for people to "do something about" their emotions has to come from themselves. People own their emotional problems, so one can be empathetic/sympathetic but can rarely be more than an observer.
And of course, try to expand one's circle to take in emotionally stronger, more optimistic people.
From my own experience, I wish there was a magic bullet. But there isn't.

Wishing both of you well...

Hi Anala

Yeah it's a doozy when it hits like this, I'm empathic and very emotional so...

The first thing to try is not letting it happen in the first place, envisioning helps there. It doesn't natter what is envisioned as long as he chooses the strongest vision. For instance, what he's feeling from others can be seen as a stream or torrent coming towards him from other people, so what he could envision is putting a mental dam between him and other people to stem the flow of energy coming at him. It takes a little practice initially but even building the mental damn - tell him to create as much detail as he can, it'll make it more 'real' in his mind - will take his mind off his feelings as well. Or being a rock in the stream where the water flows past. If the anxiety is rising inside him he could hold is arms out with his palms up to let it flow from where it originates, through his body and out of his hands, the light rising to the Universe. What worked for me in public was putting my arms straight down by my side and aiming my palms at he other person, concentrating on giving people their energies back. Again it's strength and detail, and the key words are energy/water, flow and out. If he's into Star Wars or superheroes then he could envision being a Jedi, if he can envision that stronger. What that process does it it also strengthens the mind a little and can give him a sense of control that he's probably lacking. It's easy to feel like a victim to your emotions sometimes, I know I did.

There's masses of information out there for young people and their emotions if you drop the 'empath' or 'Spiritual', empathic/Spiritual emotions are just he same as regular emotions, but they're experienced in an empathic/Spiritual context. There are also plenty of empath chatrooms for young people, so it's just a case of signing up and trying one or two.

What might also help is giving vent to his emotions, because the build-up only makes things very much worse. If his emotions are building up then they could affect his mental health further, as well as his physical health and self esteem. Take him to boxing or martial arts classes or even the gym, anything physical so he can work out those emotions - even to the point of exhaustion if need be. I was a very angry young man so I know how it can feel.

Blessings in the hope you can find something that will help

[Emm]

Originally Posted by Anala

I am humbly requesting advice.

My son who is 24 and away at college will be coming home for the summer. We talk weekly and he is becoming more aware of his empathic abilities. He is describing anxiety from feeling everyone’s emotions. So, I put this out to you all and your years of wisdom and experience.
What would you have wanted someone to say to ease the stress of feeling so much?

Are there books for young people?

Are there chat groups for young empaths?

I am most likely too close to this to really help in an affective way. He and I are cut from the same cloth.

I should explain he wears several labels, autism, genetically unique, ptsd, nde, medically fragile and a few that are only his to share. The labels vaguely provide a frame of reference, but do not define who he is.

Thank you for taking the time to read this.

A piece of advice I had around that age was when things become overwhelming do one thing at a time quietly and leave the rest because the rest is not your job. Hand it over to the universe/god... whichever way you'd like to phrase this...and the rest will work out. You can put it in the same context with others emotions...emotional dramas are ripe at that age especially in a tertiary environment...and being autistic I'm guessing can feel like sensory overload...he needs to look after himself first, find out his own limits then find a quiet space to re-energise. We're no good to anyone if we ourselves are unable to cope so I feel I would advise to know himself first.

Its all a learning curve and being a parent is hard especially in letting go. So many times I've had to remind myself of that...its ok to be there for them when they need to vent but they do find their own answers eventually. I hope all goes well when he comes home.

[Anala]

janielee,

ntroduce him to gentle meditation techniques? Something that will allow him to learn, if it is possible, to not find emotions so overwhelming. In Buddhist meditation, for example, one sits and focuses more generally on the body and allows what comes to come, gently, allowing what is to arise, abide and then go.

I did not know about this and Buddhist meditation. My elder is Buddhist and wants to spend time with him, so...

Lorelyen,

Not so sure too much can be done. It isn't something that therapists and psychologists can help with. They can waffle and make suggestions that are rarely practical simply because a) they can't get to the individual's raw data (what, in actuality, has given them this blessing or curse, depending how you look at it), and b) will try to bend a person's "problem" to fit one of their preset solutions (which often reflect their own problems).

We have experienced this with him and he has found a couple of amazing people to trust with his psyche. He will have a couple of check in appointments while home.

It's important to realise that the impetus for people to "do something about" their emotions has to come from themselves. People own their emotional problems, so one can be empathetic/sympathetic but can rarely be more than an observer.

. I will hold on to these words. It Is a good reminder!

Greenslade
[QUOTEThe first thing to try is not letting it happen in the first place, envisioning helps there. It doesn't natter what is envisioned as long as he chooses the strongest vision. For instance, what he's feeling from others can be seen as a stream or torrent coming towards him from other people, so what he could envision is putting a mental dam between him and other people to stem the flow of energy coming at him. It takes a little practice initially but even building the mental damn - tell him to create as much detail as he can, it'll make it more 'real' in his mind - will take his mind off his feelings as well. Or being a rock in the stream where the water flows past. If the anxiety is rising inside him he could hold is arms out with his palms up to let it flow from where it originates, through his body and out of his hands, the light rising to the Universe. What worked for me in public was putting my arms straight down by my side and aiming my palms at he other person, concentrating on giving people their energies back. Again it's strength and detail, and the key words are energy/water, flow and out. If he's into Star Wars or superheroes then he could envision being a Jedi, He will like this! if he can envision that stronger. What that process does it it also strengthens the mind a little and can give him a sense of control that he's probably lacking.][/quote] Visualizing is a good idea, it is his strong suit.

Emm

A piece of advice I had around that age was when things become overwhelming do one thing at a time quietly and leave the rest because the rest is not your job. Hand it over to the universe/god... whichever way you'd like to phrase this...and the rest will work out.

This is a good reminder.

Its all a learning curve and being a parent is hard especially in letting go. So many times I've had to remind myself of that...its ok to be there for them when they need to vent but they do find their own answers eventually

.
Yes, it is!

[John32241]

Originally Posted by Anala

I should explain he wears several labels, autism, genetically unique, ptsd, nde, medically fragile and a few that are only his to share. The labels vaguely provide a frame of reference, but do not define who he is.

Hello,

That is quite an array of energetic influences. As a parent myself I have been guided to just be that loving person in my son's life. He does not want spiritual, or any other kind of advice, from his dad. Just love and 100% acceptance.

Now your son may be different and actually want some direction from you. May I go so far as to say that boys and girls are different. What works well for that intuitive lady most likely will not be as productive for that male instinct/inclination driven person. The guy uses gut based feelings and logical reasoning. Empathic energies for him may not be the same as they are for you.

I find that for any one the best source of guidance and direction will come from within them in the form of spiritual guides or their higher self. So that would be my first goal or objective. Encourage you son to become self empowered. Then the various issues in his life can be delt with through expanding his self awareness.

I hope that these thoughts will be helpful.

John

Thanks John.

[Anala]

[quote=John32241,
May I go so far as to say that boys and girls are different. What works well for that intuitive lady most likely will not be as productive for that male instinct/inclination driven person. The guy uses gut based feelings and logical reasoning. Empathic energies for him may not be the same as they are for you.

I find that for any one the best source of guidance and direction will come from within them in the form of spiritual guides or their higher self. So that would be my first goal or objective. Encourage you son to become self empowered. Then the various issues in his life can be delt with through expanding his self awareness.

I hope that these thoughts will be helpful.

John[/QUOTE]

John,

They are helpful. Thank you!

My son has expressed the logic side, as he describes himself as “Spock like”. At times he is frustrated we are not all like Spock. He usually describes his anxiety with people as his brain trying to predict all of the possible behaviors of everyone in the room. That is why the “feeling everyone” discussion and the word “empath” was a bit surprising. I appreciate the perspective of the gentlemen in the room and you as a father.

I think it will be an interesting summer, for all of us.

[John32241]

Originally Posted by Anala

I think it will be an interesting summer, for all of us.

Yes it will be.

All of us are able to talk with our higher self and the higher self of those we love. You can call it praying if that is your inclination. The thing to ask for are insights from the divine on the best ways to encourage you son. Knowing that you are doing your best in that respect will help you.

Trust in what you intuitively get and show interested in him. Love like that is magic.

John