Not Sure What to make of this

[CcolTonS7]

Yesterday I fell asleep early, around 7pm, but woke back up at about 9:30pm. I turned on the tv, ate some pizza, by the time 11 o'clock came around I decided it was time to try to get back to sleep, I had stuff to do in the morning.

So as I usually do, I went to meditation. As I silenced my mind something different happened that I never felt before, at least not in the same way. It was like a building tension in the middle of my forehead. Figuring it was my third eye I decided not to think too much about it and decided to just keep meditating and accepting the sensation as a part of the experience.

Before I knew it I was in the dream world, I was still on my couch (where I've grown a habit of sleeping... for the tv) laying down. And then, it felt like someone was in my house, like I heard something. I got up from the couch, my house was unusually dark, all the lights were off. I went to go check the back door as I walked through the hall way and infront of the door all I could see were the whites of someones eyes.

After that I was wrestled and taken down the hallway into my fathers room where suddenly I was the height of a small child, the room was warmly lit, like morning time, my father was laying in bed peacefully sleeping, but there was a man, the man who came into the house, who's eyes I saw in the dark, the one who drug me into my fathers room, was sitting at the foot of his bed by his side staring at me. Smiling at me, the kind of smile that said "go ahead and try doing whatever you want it's not going to work."

The man was dark skinned, possibly hispanic, had dark hair, light rimmed glasses (like 90's but slimmer), wearing a yellow shirt. I stood there staring at him, begging him in my heart not to hurt my dad because he didn't deserve to get hurt. But he just smiled at me, he was going to do what he wanted to do. I felt so powerless, I couldn't do anything, until I ran out the door.

It was dark again, I remember trying to get out the front door as fast as I could. I unlocked the dead bolt, ran outside and tried to yell for help but my attempts were useless. All I could muster up was this awkward muted yell in my throat that didn't seem to go anywhere. I ran up to a house and knocked on the door, but the house was empty and it had no walls. It was just a frame with furniture in it.

I ran down those steps, went to the street to seek out safety. I kept trying to yell, forcing it as best I could.

When I finally got out the word help, I woke up.

As I awoke I found myself still making that noise in my throat.

Back on the couch in the dark. I woke just as I did in the dream. I looked at the clock, I don't remember what time it was.

I don't remember if I got up to go check things out or if I laid back down.

But i remember not much time went by.

and I remember waking up this morning and wondering to myself what the hell that was.

I can't tell if it was a message, or a spiritual attack or maybe even a little bit of both.

I've ap before. It's a gift in my family. This was uncomfortably close to home.

And that man, it was like I was powerless to him.

He was sitting on the left side of my dad, and coming from a christian rooting I can't help but wonder if that might have some significance.

I also wonder if it's a spirit in my house maybe.

Based off of how I was able to describe this, what category do you think this sort of experience falls into?

[Crystal Ambassador]

I'd think it's closer to the dreams category, but it's a pretty fine line.

I've had similar dreams before; not the specific details, but the feeling and the voice-muted "help" that is extremely difficult to get out, wakes you up, and is still happening when you wake up. It's a recurring dream for me, though the content changes.

Is it possible you have a form of PTSD, or other memories of a similar helpless state?

[CcolTonS7]

No, don't get me wrong I've had feelings of helplessness but what human being at some point doesn't?

Lately I've been feeling as if I am getting messed with, as if I'm being kept in the dark about something and/or deliberately getting driven to frustration so others can see me at my worst.

But as I do in all my times of distress and even gratefulness I sought out my higher power for guidance and as I have been listening and following the spirit I hear the answer the universe has given me.

Shamanism has been presented to me in multiple different ways, and since this experience it has presented itself to me even more strongly.

As if the universe is throwing information into my face and screaming at me to read that article, watch that video, listen to what that person says, pay attention to that dream and it's all information that has helped me understand not only what I am going through but also who I am.

Since this experience, and receiving the information from the spirit I realize that I have been on a shamanic path without even realizing it. It was as if I just knew and I let the spirit lead me. The only trouble is I lost sight of what I was aiming for, I forgot why I was on this journey in the first place. But without having gone through it I would not have been able to learn the difference.

I had never experienced such a helpless state as I had in that 'dream.' However now that I have experienced it and felt what it's like to be in that state I have grown and learned from it. It prepares me for the future so if I ever do come into an event in which I feel powerless or helpless I will be stronger than I would have before, because I had gone through it before. Experiences and emotions are just as real in a dream as they are in waking life.

And yet I'm not totally convinced this was a dream. I was in my home just as it was, I walked down the hallway just as I would. It was dark, then what came out of the dark brought me into the light of my fathers room, where I saw a man sitting beside my father with my fathers and my own life in his hands.

A dream, my dreams, tend to be more abstract than this was. It's usual for them to be very vivid to the point where sometimes I can even feel the elements around me. The other times I have astral projected was always within the boundaries of my own home or other places beyond. I can tell the difference.

But this was unique in that it was a sort of mix between an astral like state and a dream like state. I was in the boundaries of my home, nothing about my home was altered, only the daylight in my fathers room and my perceived height altered.

I think maybe this doesn't fall under astral projection, but I was definitely in a different place where a message was being given to me. Maybe it would fall under the vision category, or message.

[Crystal Ambassador]

It sounds like it could be in either category; if the mods deem it one way or the other, they'll move it.

It's pretty deep and insightful, to be aware of intuition/guidance as well as the benefits of what you've experienced and how it can help in the future. You also said that you had lost sight of the reason you were on your journey; did you remember?

You mentioned Shamanism, which was curious, and specifically that it's been presented to you before. Towards the end you also mentioned the dream/astral projection was very vivid. To me that sounds like it could be an unintentional Journey, and something in the recesses of my mind seems to recall that this can happen with people being called to that path. Do you have any interest in practicing it, other than what you've been doing?

[Sunshine111]

That would have creeped the hell out of me for sure, would have taken it as a warning sign/message and have resulted in some sort of blessing or ritual for protection.

In other words, would have acted on it and used my energy that way instead of trying to explain it scientifically.

My recommendation is to make up your own mind about "what that was" , what you think and believe that was and act upon it, irrelevant to "what that was", whether that was something or nothing that can be explained or not.

Do what makes you feel safe and protected.

[CcolTonS7]

Originally Posted by Crystal Ambassador

It sounds like it could be in either category; if the mods deem it one way or the other, they'll move it.

It's pretty deep and insightful, to be aware of intuition/guidance as well as the benefits of what you've experienced and how it can help in the future. You also said that you had lost sight of the reason you were on your journey; did you remember?

You mentioned Shamanism, which was curious, and specifically that it's been presented to you before. Towards the end you also mentioned the dream/astral projection was very vivid. To me that sounds like it could be an unintentional Journey, and something in the recesses of my mind seems to recall that this can happen with people being called to that path. Do you have any interest in practicing it, other than what you've been doing?

I do and I don't. But, I think I've been on the path. I've had visions before, that's why I handled this last one probably better than the average person would, I was prepared for it. Talking it out is helping me make sense of it.
It's like this feeling I have that not only has everything happened in my life for a reason, but I'm also being prepared for something.

I had a teacher, not an official school teacher, not an official teacher at all acutally, but she was a teacher the universe provided me, she was a healer in the community, the only one. She read my aura, healed my energies, all without costs, it was a spirit thing- not a money thing. She encouraged my curiosity and thirst for spiritual knowledge.

Then I had a second teacher from the universe, very similar to the first but on a different level. With her it wasn't one on one, it was in a group setting because she was a real teacher but she dove into spirit on the first day and was very bold when it came to expressing her spirituality. She taught me how to meditate with purpose and live my truth. Not only that, but she validated many of the philosophical, spiritual, and scientific ideas and truths I have found through my own journey that before I was uncertain of because I thought of it all by myself.

I fear I might sound a little arrogant, I don't mean to.

It's just a little exciting you know? Like, how being guided by my intuition has reflected so many paths before me that were unknown to me until I started making steps on it.

I got to the akashic records three years before I even knew what the akashic records were. I was explaining my experience to someone and they told me that's what I did and they were amazed.

I told a monk about it and he was surprised. he said, "wait... YOU saw that? YOU found that?"

You see? Do you see who I am?

I'm aware, and you want to know something? The amount of spiritual potential I have is frightening. The power I have to manifest things in this world is almost unimaginable and definitely unbelievable. Literally, if I told you you wouldn't believe me and you'd tell me to go straight to the nuthouse.

It's like when you're exposed to such a high energy of awareness, you remain connected to it whether you like it or not, and what you feed into it alters not just your own reality but the entire world. My thoughts aren't my own, they ripple throughout the cosmos and alter the world.

My words are like water that thirsty mouths drink--so I have to make sure I speak with purity.

[Lynn]

Hello

A dream within a dream. You have a habit of the TV being on and sleeping so part of what is on TV will come into your subconsciousness when sleeping. Part of your brain is in that waking state here listening to the TV and the other part is in that "I want to shut down" sleep state.

The man in your Father's room could be a spirit or guide. Is there maybe a message for your Father from this man ? You could well feel powerless as the message was not for you but you walked into that path.

You mention that there is a family line of being sensitive this could be you walking up to more of it or being ready to open to more of it.

Lynn