Dress Appropriate For Modern Times

[MIND POWER]

Originally Posted by 7luminaries

Yer spot on Holly...men will date but most give up as soon as they see the light of sincerity and authenticity in your eyes, LOL...because you're not giving them the signal you'll be on offer 24/7 very soon. I.e., you're actually trying to have a normal conversation -- and you're not sexing them up, fingering your hair and your neckline, licking your lips, making eyes, touching them or yourself all the time, and otherwise acting/speaking overtly provocatively. Really lame, but true. Most women's casual clothing is already cut to be fairly tight and reasonably provocative but bonus points for many if the woman reveals a lot of skin on top or wears skintight trousers or tights with a lot of bum cleavage, or leaves off undergarments. This spells out "I'm already halfway on offer" to the snake brain trying to sniff out its next fix.

Keep the faith, as they say

BUT also spot on you and Sky123, on everything else about Islam.
Men are required by Islam to be modest in dress, behaviour, gaze, intent, and thought -- just as women are. To be honest...if everyone minded their own game and took responsibility for themselves, that's the end of it right there.

But in every culture, the burden of morality is dumped on women. It's just currently usually much more blatant in many non-Western cultures, but not always. Look at all the misogyny coming to the fore in the US, sadly. And look at the prosecution statistics for rape against all the reported rapes and test kits, in any country, pretty much. Traditional Islamic culture is extreme and barbaric toward women but then again, Western culture is too when as you say a man expects and demands penetration within a month or so of casual dating. That too is really just brutal and barbaric, the whole assumption in the West that women are mindless holes, disposable and subhuman, so no need to get to know us.

Peace & blessings
7L

Women sells her virginity to highest bidder.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ftBJYbY1PG0

Western women selling themselves in Dubai to be exploited.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zd2xxN2jc04

I am not sure whether you truly believe what you are saying 100% 7luminaries, when you have women around the world behaving in such ways as in those video’s I have posted! In such ways that deeply disturbed me and upset me as a man! You know? because I kind of fancy you! (And as women you all need to recognize the part you are playing in your own demise!) It has once been said that women are the devils gateway, and you are more prone to be manipulated by evil! But no matter what, human man will always follow, forgive and protect you (There will always be man who exist like this!) Because the truth of the matter is, we are all still deeply in love with you! I can’t stand feminist, but I know on a genetic level whether I like it or not? That I am a feminist! And the greatest feminist that have ever lived where men! Because when the tough gets going baby, it will only be man that will save you!

We where there for you in the beginning, and we will be there for you in the end! Not any archangels, not any aliens or some trickster entity (Not even your fellow woman!) Human man in his fallen state, because even in this state we are quite a big deal! What all women need to understand is that in the whole greater scheme of things, you are not the weaker sex totally! And the reason why you are not the weaker sex is because man will always have a weakness for you, which you don’t understand 7luminaries! It’s beyond lust, and it has nothing to do with sex! You see? Women are the only thing throughout the history of mankind; you are the only thing that we love enough to die for! (This gives you a lot of power to influence us!)..Would die for me baby?

[Holly]

Originally Posted by markings

I have so many problems with this post. With an attitude like that you *will* not have sex again, ever.
It is really disappointing to see how low an opinion, and by implication low respect, you have of men.

That 50% thing really sucks. How much do you want for yourself, 90%, 99%? And you call men selfish?

Why are men expected to understand and accommodate woman but there is virtually no understanding and accommodation of men in return?

No, Markings, I'll never have sex with someone who wants to use me again ;) And if it turns out the world is full of ONLY the type of men who want to use me, then no, I won't have sex again, and that's fine by me. If you'd read my other recent posts, you'd see that I am an outspoken supporter of men's rights, and I feel men have been utterly oppressed by women recently. They also get used by women a LOT and a lot of men end up in the same sitation I've been in where they've been used and objectified. Don't take the post so LITERALLY. It's a generalisation. It's been largely my experience. I'm obviously not saying EVERY SINGLE MAN IN THE WHOLE UNIVERSE is like that. (Lord almighty LOL I'm going to start putting a disclaimer at the top of my posts because the AMOUNT of TIMES I have to type this up in response to knee-jerk reactions.)

I've often said on here that you dont know somebody until you've seen them through every season once. As I said, I am not a very good judge of character. I don't TRUST my own judgement as I'm too easy to lie to, because I have a trusting nature. I've learned by bitter experience that I have to test people and judge their nature for myself over TIME. If I don't do that I will end up hurt again. If you knew me at all you'd know I have absolute respect for men and their bodies. If I didn't, I wouldn't have managed to sustain my relationship with Azrael all these years. Do you think an archangel would be in a relationship with someone who disrespected him?? The trouble is that a lot of men don't have respect for me and mine, or even for themselves! It's very hard to find one who does (a human one anyway.) And because a lot of men actively LIE to get sex or sexual pleasure in other ways, I find it's safer for me to insist we wait so that I can't be deceived again.

I'd rather be able to just take every man at his word. I'd love that. The world would be better if ALL men and ALL woman didn't lie, if they were transparent like angelic beings are and we could all trust one another. That's my ideal world. But THIS world is not like that. Because a few men (and women!!) lie to get sex, women end up HAVING to treat everyone the same in the first instance to ensure their own physical and emotional safety. It's not fair, no. But for me it's necessary. As for wanting all the pleasure myself, well, having all the pleasure yourself isn't the point of loving sex. Put it this way...archangels tend to "get off" on being touched and given pleasure with absolute and ultimate love, by someone being entirely selfless. It has to be selfless, as that is true love. Does that give you an idea of my attitude towards the man I love??

Markings, I was RAPED when I was 12 years old, before I'd even reached puberty, by a friend at a sleepover who just wanted sexual pleasure and was willing to harm me to do it. I trusted that person utterly. I was utterly betrayed. You are criticising me for being careful but if you had been through that I imagine you'd be careful who you choose to get close to, too! I learned that ANYONE who is horny and wants to orgasm may hurt me. That's been my experience in non-consensual AND consensual situations. That said I know some men and women who I trust utterly. But I've KNOWN THEM for YEARS ;) And that's the key. Knowing someone fully.

[markings]

Originally Posted by Holly

I'd rather be able to just take every man at his word. I'd love that. The world would be better if ALL men and ALL woman didn't lie, if they were transparent like angelic beings are and we could all trust one another. That's my ideal world. But THIS world is not like that.

Who has to change that the world looks more like your ideal one?
Your post reminds me of Bill Maher's comment about sharing one's innermost fantasies. He finds the suggestion ludicrous because as he says "we (men) find yours boring and you (women) find ours offensive". He is not far from the truth.
Even Oprah, on one of her shows a few years ago couldn't take the guest couple husband's fantasy and basically ignored him while the wife got support for her fantasy from just about everyone.
What is left to us men but to lie when we are asked what do you fantasize about? And that often goes for other things as well.

[Holly]

Originally Posted by markings

Who has to change that the world looks more like your ideal one?
Your post reminds me of Bill Maher's comment about sharing one's innermost fantasies. He finds the suggestion ludicrous because as he says "we (men) find yours boring and you (women) find ours offensive". He is not far from the truth.
Even Oprah, on one of her shows a few years ago couldn't take the guest couple husband's fantasy and basically ignored him while the wife got support for her fantasy from just about everyone.

My world will change as I change. But until then I apply these limits for my own wellbeing. Personally, I don't mind what men fantasise about. Assuming he doesn't tell me he wants to torture me because it would turn him on. Like one guy did. That was definitely offensive. NORMAL fantasies (not psycho ones LOL) are normal! And not a problem IMO.

Originally Posted by markings

What is left to us men but to lie when we are asked what do you fantasize about? And that often goes for other things as well.

That's the point though. The lying. I don't lie to Az. He knows literally MORE about me than I do! And I know things about him that he'd be more comfortable if I didn't. Az has fantasies. Sometimes they're just about as dirty and physical as a man can possibly get and I go..OMG NO WAY am I ever doing that! Other times they're fantasies I share. I don't EXPECT them and he doesn't EXPECT his. We do what we're both comfortable with. HE can get by without lying. It means he has to be truly vulnerable to me, and trust me. What excuse do human men have, except that they're afraid to be vulnerable??

Which reminds me, IMO many women can be EVERY BIT as ignorant and are VERY guilty of objectifying themselves, other women and men! Women actively feed this culture by dressing like..well...prostitutes frankly, in some cases. Sometimes women are WORSE than men. They ASK to be treated that way. They've been asking for string-free sex for so long that its become a cultural norm. Now the majority of guys expect it as routine! If women stopped asking, men would behave differently because the truth is MOST guys don't actually want to hurt us, they want to love us. They take their cues from us.

I have my own answer to the problem. I don't believe in limiting others. I only limit myself, or apply limits we BOTH agree on. I just have open relationships. I want to wait for marriage but I'm not saying HE has to, unless he wants to. That's my compromise. I think if a man is free but he still comes back to you at the end of the day, still eats with you, sleeps with you at night and shares his life, he truly loves you for you Same for a woman.