please, I need help for my father

[Shine]

My father is 88 years old and my stepmother just passed away on valentine's day and we are having a church service this saturday.
dad is trying very hard to be strong and I feel he is keeping all his grief inside.
a family friend who spoke to him on the phone a few minutes ago made him cry. He hung up the phone on his friend. Its the very first time I've ever seen him cry my whole life.
I know he really needs grieve and trying to keep it in certainly isn't healthy.
the problem is that he doesn't want to cry in public or in front of me and told me he doesn't want anyone to say anything to him or touch him neither.
He can be pretty feisty when he's upset. I'm afraid the service which is going to be two hours my (step brother is doing the service) Then reception at the church to follow will be way to much for him and I don't know what to do. There could be 200 people coming.

what can I do? please send positive energy and prayers and any advice you can offer would be greatly appreciated

Love shine

[Ko'onthra]

He needs to grieve in his own way.Let him know he isn't alone.Say you'll be there for him. I am sorry for your loss. Light be with you.

[Shine]

Thank you Hi ko'onthra. Ive told him he needs to greive but he seems to think he needs to hind his feelings. I sincerely hope he has a few good cries while im at work. Otherwise im afraid of what the stress might do. :(

[knightofalbion]

Poor man.

Tell him from me, there's no shame in a man crying. I cried when my mother passed over. It was, I must confess, rather unnerving not to be in control of one's emotions. But whilst it was humbling, I didn't feel ashamed. I loved her and that love was being expressed, given rightful pride of place.

I think it's a good thing for a man to be humbled. I certainly feel the better for it.

Maybe having a pair of shades might help him? Just something to give him a perception of privacy if he feels he needs it.

I certainly think a non-drowsy tranquillizer e.g. librium, from his doctor or a natural herbal tranquillizer e.g. valerian/passiflora would help him.
And you too.

Having you there by his side will be the greatest help of all.

Wishing you well....

[Shine]

Thank you knightofalbion. He seems to be coping better these past couple of days. Im sure he will still have his moments though.
shades are a good idea.
thank you
love shine