Becoming a fearless awake woman in the world

[awareness]

Shine on,
my Brave Goddesses,
shine on...

[Deepsoul]

Becoming a breatharian is important ,,so fire breath ,,dantien breathing ,,nadi nose breathing all help move and do different things to chi and spirit! Sorry in a rush

[Shivani Devi]

Then, there are those times God just does what He does solely to upset and anger my mother because it just amuses Him way too much.

The other day on here, the user 'Sugar-n-spice' told me to find my "inner b*tch"...she doesn't know that I have already found it and He just happens to be the Lord of the 4th Dimension and no other.

And so it was, a few days ago, I was in the car with my mother, listening to this nifty little tune which always totally trips me out on Bhairo-bliss:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kFc7NzeWP8M

Yep, learned all the words of it and was singing along...mum goes "doesn't that exhaust you singing that?"

In the middle of trance, I rolled down my window and to the passers by, I was yelling out "Bham Bham BHOLE!!' and "Har Har Mahadev!!".

Mum's there going '"stop it! you stop that right now!" and I'm like "why stop it?" she's like "those people...they all must think you're mad". Yeah, so Shiva goes "so, you gonna see them all again are you? I doubt I will".

Now, when Shiva gets started on my mother, I pity her...winds down the window again, passes the next lot of people..."Jai Shiva SHAMBHO!!" and mum's like "I told you to stop" and He goes "I heard you!" lol

Then mum goes "we're in Australia! not effing INDIA" and He goes, "so you think God only lives in India, do you?" *laughs*

Winds down window again..."Bham Bham BHOLE!!"

Mum: "What if the police catch you? They'll think you are drunk/high and arrest you"....then it was .like:"yes I AM drunk/high but they haven't invented a gadget which can measure it yet".

Mum: "Okay, would you PLEASE stop it? I am beseeching you and appealing to any degree of sanity you have left" and I was like "Good luck with that, but since you asked me nicely and did not TELL me what to do." *winds up window and turns CD player off*

[A human Being]

So sad that it's the person who sees things the way they are who ends up in a psyche ward, but I guess that's liable to happen in an insane world. Unfortunate, but I guess all you can do is accept that most people aren't ready to see as you see, and adjust as best you can. And take comfort in the knowledge that there's a community of people who DO understand

What a frightening thing to happen and I truly hope you're ok, relating to your immediate situations.

I can't claim to have had these experiences directly but am aware of what it's like to be entirely disoriented in time (and place for that matter) though my own doing in the quest to explore the depths. The process isn't allowed discussion here for good enough reasons. Let's just say it comes under psychedelia. Although one comes back to biological normal, things are perceptibly never the same.

However, there have been places with an intensely different psychic mood that triggered unexpected happenings, one being in the Caribbean.


What's a little surprising (could be you've just omitted any mention of it) is the absence of support from those who provided the means for your (highly meritable) meditation. That alone was some feat. Did you do it alone?

Lack of experience makes suggestion difficult but I doubt any psychiatric/psychology thing is going to be the answer. These people can cosh you with their drugs which doesn't alter the condition. (I can't use the word "problem" as it probably isn't). But at least one thing you can be consoled about - no matter what happened in past lives you're here now in a relatively safe place (but for the gross misunderstanding of parents) and what you're going through could be a huge catharsis.

Unfortunately it will take long to heal now it's opened up. Probably best to engage in everyday things as best you can - interests, hobbies, writing out your feelings (which can be a terrific therapy). And not to feel your awakening is bad or strange. It's there, it happened. It's good that you've moved on from the remote past.

Part of the trouble is words trying to explain experiences. Your meditation has given you a different view of the world and its rich interconnections. It sounds like it bears the seeds of some great wisdoms, a broadening of awareness, a very real awakening.



♥

[blackraven]

Originally Posted by bluebird21

Hi all, first I want to say this is a very sensitive thing for me to bring up... So please, respect and kindness are a must if you respond. Thank you.

I recently had an extraordinary experience of transcendence after doing a cleanse and practice. I did a month long meditation retreat at the beginning of the year and have been noticing shifts in how I experience myself since. I experienced breaking out of linear time and was completely in the NOW. In this place, there was no birth, no death, I was absorbed in Pure Awareness, and I was free.

I kept telling my mom I am you and you are me, that there is no birth and no death. She ended up bringing me to a psych ward because she was very freaked out (we speak different languages as it is...) and I was involuntarily admitted, not based on how I presented, but largely on all my mother's concerns. I was forced to take meds which made me horribly sick. I fought for my life and was let out of there eventually, on none of the meds they tried to give me, with no diagnosis. I've since gone back to experiencing linear time (identifying with my thoughts of past/future) and am more grounded (in my body.)

The experience of being so utterly misunderstood and traumatized to such an extreme has shocked me. I've emotionally shut down since this experience. I mean Jesus...

This experience has triggered tremendous grief. Memories of being an awakened woman in past lives in which horrible things were done to me have surfaced. I feel like a deer in the head lights emotionally, I'm not even meditating out of fear of feeling this wound of feeling like I can not be who I am in this world.

Ladies, how have you/are you healing the burned at the stake wound? Whatever it specifically was for you, the wound that says you can not be your wide awake big hearted witchy self in this world or else you will be severely punished. I know many have it...

I want to stop being so terrified.

Thank you.

Hi bluebird21. I do a lot of reading and I have to say the most inspiring book I ever read was "Meeting the Mad Woman - Empowering the Feminine Spirit". I put the link to the book below. I think you might find this a very good read at this time in your life. Best of luck to you.

http://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/bo...9780553373189/

[Sugar-n-Spice]

You are such a sweet soul blackraven *hugs*

And bluebird my last post was finished

[bluebird21]

Thank you all I greatly appreciate the tenderness and support.

[Sugar-n-Spice]

Yw bluebird *hugs*
And deepsoul putting on weight doesn't make you less of a hottie you just have to get adjusted to your changed self :)

[Deepsoul]

Ha Thanks Sugar, Yes new wardrobe and such ,,its not so muh that ,,but i was a walker ,,i walked cause iloved it so and seeing nature and doing yoga ,,big spiritual transformations though and the quote ,"Be still and know that I am God" is pretty appropiate ,,real busy and havent read mch of thread ,,but Thanks again Spicy!